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Triple Bogey

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At work today I was on the till and I served these two blokes. When they were walking out the shop, one of them started doing an impression of how I speak. He was saying something in a stupid voice (mine) and the other one was laughing. The other colleague on the till looked at me, didn't say anything but we was both thinking the same thing - 'pair of wankers'

Anyway it didn't bother me too much but I remember when I started in retail in the mid 90's it used to happen all the time. And I mean all the time, every hour, every shift. Somebody, mostly youths but not always would make fun out of me. Do an impression of my voice, or call me whatever; gay, wanker, simple etc. There wasn't much I could do apart from stand there and take it. All the insults and honeysuckle for a few quid an hour.

So the abuse went on for months and escalated into physical abuse (somebody punched me the face) - Also because the shop was quite near I lived I started to get abuse outside of work. People would call names at me. Shout abuse when I walked to the shops. I was in my mid 20's then as well. So getting bullied was crazy. They would call me Mr Bean and call me gay. If I stood up the them I would get threatened with violence. It was a miserable existence. The shop closed at the end of 1995 and I lost my job. It was a relief in some ways. Two years later I got a job for the same company but in a different area of the city. It's my current job. I've had abuse but never as bad and I don't do nights. So it's always been a lot better.

Today brought it all back. How garbage my life was then back then !
 
This is influenced by my experiences at school, but the 90's seemed like a particularly bad time for this sort of thing.

I rarely overhear the level of aggression and nastiness in teenagers that was commonplace when I was growing up.
 
I can't believe how cruel people are sometimes. So what if people have different voices? This saddens me, I have like 3 students with speech problems, and no one says anything about it here. What immature jerks.
 
If that was me, just saying, I'd hit the wankers right in the face. No job is worth the abuse you suffered through. I am American but my aunt is from Newcastle originally.
 
That just makes me sad, no one deserves that kind of abuse :( It sounds like you at least had a colleague backing you up at work today. It's amazing how bad memories can come back in a flash, isn't it?

-Teresa
 
Don't let those idiots ruin your day.

They'll probably be drinking out of a gutter some day. That should be enough consolation for you. :D
 
swflyers93 said:
If that was me, just saying, I'd hit the wankers right in the face. No job is worth the abuse you suffered through. I am American but my aunt is from Newcastle originally.
Click to expand...

Yeah, the guy didn't deserve this but if he ended up hitting these idiots he could have lost his job but I'm sure he needed it to make money.

And they called him Mr. Bean? I've seen Rowan Atkinson play Mr. Bean on TV and there's nothing wrong with him. I think he's kind of funny and this is coming from a Yank.
 
Thanks everybody. Yesterday was rare, stuff like that doesn't happen much. Most of the customers are very nice and I enjoy talking to them.
I always think of my 20's as a really horrible time. I couldn't get a job and when I did it was some honeysuckle, part time job beneath me and I had to take all that
honeysuckle from those wankers.
 
Man, TB. I feel for you there. I'm glad you at least had your co-worker there to sympathize. I wouldn't say I've experienced quite the same thing, but some minor things such as people shouting abuse at me from cars. Usually teenagers, I imagine. I always think, stand and fight me, cowards. But they always just drive away. Fortunately that has not happened in a while and it was rare to begin with. I can only imagine how awful it must have been for you to get that every shift, every day and be powerless to retaliate, to stand up for yourself because you'd lose your job if you fought back and put them in their place. I don't advocate violence, but at the same time, people should understand that insulting others isn't free. That sometimes there are consequences. Treat others as you would treat yourself, and all that.

When you were punched in the face though, I believe that makes you entitled to fight back in self-defense. Also, that's something you could have reported to the police. It's criminal to just attack someone unprovoked. I think the cops would have been on your side.

One thing though. Have you ever thought about trying to get a different, better-paying job? Is there a community college nearby that you could attend, take some courses and get some kind of certificate that could get you a better position? I can't help but think that some of the abuse you have received and the misfortune you've gone through has been, at least in some way, because you are in retail. People who work in retail, or just people who don't get paid a lot in general, simply aren't given any respect. It is unfortunately socially acceptable to joke about or make fun of people who work in retail or fast food or things like that, or to treat such people badly. And the low paycheck and mindless work, combined with how people look down on you, really hurts one's confidence. I know because that's how I felt when I was in those jobs. I felt like the reason I was in those jobs was because I was dumb, good at nothing, had no potential because if I was good enough, I'd be able to do something else. It really hurt my faith in myself.

Anyway, I hope I haven't offended you there, Bogey, but having a better title and a little more money in your pocket might be a little confidence booster. It might be worth it to pursue some kind of certificate and try to move up a little.
 
TheSkaFish said:
Man, TB. I feel for you there. I'm glad you at least had your co-worker there to sympathize. I wouldn't say I've experienced quite the same thing, but some minor things such as people shouting abuse at me from cars. Usually teenagers, I imagine. I always think, stand and fight me, cowards. But they always just drive away. Fortunately that has not happened in a while and it was rare to begin with. I can only imagine how awful it must have been for you to get that every shift, every day and be powerless to retaliate, to stand up for yourself because you'd lose your job if you fought back and put them in their place. I don't advocate violence, but at the same time, people should understand that insulting others isn't free. That sometimes there are consequences. Treat others as you would treat yourself, and all that.

When you were punched in the face though, I believe that makes you entitled to fight back in self-defense. Also, that's something you could have reported to the police. It's criminal to just attack someone unprovoked. I think the cops would have been on your side.

One thing though. Have you ever thought about trying to get a different, better-paying job? Is there a community college nearby that you could attend, take some courses and get some kind of certificate that could get you a better position? I can't help but think that some of the abuse you have received and the misfortune you've gone through has been, at least in some way, because you are in retail. People who work in retail, or just people who don't get paid a lot in general, simply aren't given any respect. It is unfortunately socially acceptable to joke about or make fun of people who work in retail or fast food or things like that, or to treat such people badly. And the low paycheck and mindless work, combined with how people look down on you, really hurts one's confidence. I know because that's how I felt when I was in those jobs. I felt like the reason I was in those jobs was because I was dumb, good at nothing, had no potential because if I was good enough, I'd be able to do something else. It really hurt my faith in myself.

Anyway, I hope I haven't offended you there, Bogey, but having a better title and a little more money in your pocket might be a little confidence booster. It might be worth it to pursue some kind of certificate and try to move up a little.
Click to expand...

Retail work was the only work I could get. I spent a decade unemployed. I couldn't get a job so I took this crappy job in a shop just because it was offered to me.

Working in small shops is the only work I have enjoyed as well. Never liked working in a office, warehouse or a large shop. Small shops have something about them, smaller amount of staff, a better spirit, good rapport with customers. I like my job now. I don't see it as beneath me. It's well paid for what I do. Hours are great, I can do everything I want to do outside of work.
 
I used to get the Mr Bean insult too - Dark Hair, big ears and nose, clumsy and spoke with a slight amount of gormlessness. I had it everywhere, school, college, even when I was travelling in Australia and I visited a remote outback school, one of the kids started shouting "BEAN!". Complete nightmare. I stood up for myself once at high school when I was being pushed down a flight of stairs I got to my feet and slammed my assailant into a wall with as much force as I could muster. Typically I was punished for this while my assailant got off scott free but just to see the fear in his eyes, the humiliation of "Bean" giving him his comeuppance meant that every second of that detention was worth it. If I ever have children, I will teach them that violence is not the answer, but it can be necessary to escape a situation and if some do gooding limp wristed prick of a teacher has issues with that then I'll explain to them why.

Retail work is diabolical for this sort of thing - the customers know that the staff are pretty much defenseless so will take out their frustrations and cruelty on those just trying to do a job, safe in the knowledge that any reprisals would be met with instant dismissal. I remember working in an off licence where I was alone and it was extremely busy, so one guy in the queue sent his friend to stand in front of me and mock me for everything the customer I was serving wanted "ooh 20 cigarettes - that'll take him at least half an hour" I just had to take it when all I wanted to do was grab a whisky bottle and smash it into the guys face repeatedly until he was dead. My hands were shaking so much because of the stress, not helped as I was semi paralysed after a brain haemorrhage but that didn't matter.

I hope one day the tables will turn, the do-gooders who spend so long creating rules that ensure shop staff are easy targets will start creating rules that punish those dishing out the abuse instead. Sadly the nasty people also tend to be the wealthiest so who cares if the checkout assistant goes home to cut themselves because they are in so much anguish from the abuse they receive, as long as the manager hits his sales targets eh?
 
h3donist said:
I used to get the Mr Bean insult too - Dark Hair, big ears and nose, clumsy and spoke with a slight amount of gormlessness. I had it everywhere, school, college, even when I was travelling in Australia and I visited a remote outback school, one of the kids started shouting "BEAN!". Complete nightmare. I stood up for myself once at high school when I was being pushed down a flight of stairs I got to my feet and slammed my assailant into a wall with as much force as I could muster. Typically I was punished for this while my assailant got off scott free but just to see the fear in his eyes, the humiliation of "Bean" giving him his comeuppance meant that every second of that detention was worth it. If I ever have children, I will teach them that violence is not the answer, but it can be necessary to escape a situation and if some do gooding limp wristed prick of a teacher has issues with that then I'll explain to them why.

Retail work is diabolical for this sort of thing - the customers know that the staff are pretty much defenseless so will take out their frustrations and cruelty on those just trying to do a job, safe in the knowledge that any reprisals would be met with instant dismissal. I remember working in an off licence where I was alone and it was extremely busy, so one guy in the queue sent his friend to stand in front of me and mock me for everything the customer I was serving wanted "ooh 20 cigarettes - that'll take him at least half an hour" I just had to take it when all I wanted to do was grab a whisky bottle and smash it into the guys face repeatedly until he was dead. My hands were shaking so much because of the stress, not helped as I was semi paralysed after a brain haemorrhage but that didn't matter.

I hope one day the tables will turn, the do-gooders who spend so long creating rules that ensure shop staff are easy targets will start creating rules that punish those dishing out the abuse instead. Sadly the nasty people also tend to be the wealthiest so who cares if the checkout assistant goes home to cut themselves because they are in so much anguish from the abuse they receive, as long as the manager hits his sales targets eh?
Click to expand...

I'm sorry you had to go thru all that crap. My first job in retail in the mid 90's was very similar to what you describe. It was hell, I hated it. The job I have now was similar until I got rid of my night shifts. Some twat thru a beer bottle and it struck me in the eye. I had damage to my eye and was off work for 3 weeks. The fat fresia of a manager didn't even ring me up to see how I was. The night I was due to go back, some poor lad got murdered outside the shop. So I dropped my nights after threatening to quit.

Since then it has been fine. The customers are little old ladies and old chaps who want to talk about football.
 
Triple Bogey said:
Retail work was the only work I could get. I spent a decade unemployed. I couldn't get a job so I took this crappy job in a shop just because it was offered to me.

Working in small shops is the only work I have enjoyed as well. Never liked working in a office, warehouse or a large shop. Small shops have something about them, smaller amount of staff, a better spirit, good rapport with customers. I like my job now. I don't see it as beneath me. It's well paid for what I do. Hours are great, I can do everything I want to do outside of work.
Click to expand...

If you are happy, that's totally fine. Like I said, I wasn't trying to offend you but maybe offer another point of view on your woes having faced some of the same ones myself - particularly in regard to girls.

The thing is, you may not see retail as beneath you. Which, again, is fine. But a lot of people in society see retail people as beneath them, and think it's ok to bully them because of it. It's absolutely wrong of them to act that way, but that is how most people work, unfortunately. Also, a lot of women tend to look down on people who work in retail as well, as far as dating goes. It isn't mature and it isn't nice, but that's how a lot of people are.

That's why I was saying, maybe a change in careers could solve some of your problems and get people to treat you better as a result. I think it's easier to change yourself than it is to change society.

Has there ever been any other career that you've wanted to do? I'm just saying, maybe give it some thought. You could always just decide that you like what you're doing. I just thought it might be a good idea to explore all your options.
 
TheSkaFish said:
Triple Bogey said:
Retail work was the only work I could get. I spent a decade unemployed. I couldn't get a job so I took this crappy job in a shop just because it was offered to me.

Working in small shops is the only work I have enjoyed as well. Never liked working in a office, warehouse or a large shop. Small shops have something about them, smaller amount of staff, a better spirit, good rapport with customers. I like my job now. I don't see it as beneath me. It's well paid for what I do. Hours are great, I can do everything I want to do outside of work.
Click to expand...

If you are happy, that's totally fine. Like I said, I wasn't trying to offend you but maybe offer another point of view on your woes having faced some of the same ones myself - particularly in regard to girls.

The thing is, you may not see retail as beneath you. Which, again, is fine. But a lot of people in society see retail people as beneath them, and think it's ok to bully them because of it. It's absolutely wrong of them to act that way, but that is how most people work, unfortunately. Also, a lot of women tend to look down on people who work in retail as well, as far as dating goes. It isn't mature and it isn't nice, but that's how a lot of people are.

That's why I was saying, maybe a change in careers could solve some of your problems and get people to treat you better as a result. I think it's easier to change yourself than it is to change society.

Has there ever been any other career that you've wanted to do? I'm just saying, maybe give it some thought. You could always just decide that you like what you're doing. I just thought it might be a good idea to explore all your options.
Click to expand...

No I am happy where I am. I was dead lucky getting the job in the first place anyway.

Women don't like me because I work in a shop ?
Could be true. I don't know. I don't care to be honest. Women don't like me whatever. It wouldn't matter what I did.
 
TheSkaFish said:
Triple Bogey said:
Women don't like me because I work in a shop ?
Click to expand...

I don't know. I was just saying it's a possibility. Maybe the attitude is different over there, but it's definitely like that here in America.
Click to expand...

Yeah maybe both countries are different.

More and more males are working in shops these days anyway.
 
Triple Bogey said:
TheSkaFish said:
Triple Bogey said:
Women don't like me because I work in a shop ?
Click to expand...

I don't know. I was just saying it's a possibility. Maybe the attitude is different over there, but it's definitely like that here in America.
Click to expand...

Yeah maybe both countries are different.

More and more males are working in shops these days anyway.
Click to expand...

No, it's not because you are male. It's because retail is generally low-paying and seen as low-status. Again, it's crummy, but that's how a lot of people think, I'm afraid. That's another reason why I don't want to go back to it. Because I don't want to be treated that way. I'd be very frustrated and either become very angry, or it would just crush me and I'd feel very beaten inside.
 
TheSkaFish said:
Triple Bogey said:
TheSkaFish said:
Triple Bogey said:
Women don't like me because I work in a shop ?
Click to expand...

I don't know. I was just saying it's a possibility. Maybe the attitude is different over there, but it's definitely like that here in America.
Click to expand...

Yeah maybe both countries are different.

More and more males are working in shops these days anyway.
Click to expand...

No, it's not because you are male. It's because retail is generally low-paying and seen as low-status. Again, it's crummy, but that's how a lot of people think, I'm afraid. That's another reason why I don't want to go back to it. Because I don't want to be treated that way. I'd be very frustrated and either become very angry, or it would just crush me and I'd feel very beaten inside.
Click to expand...

20 years ago maybe but now with so much unemployment shop work is considered to be fine. And it's fairly well paid too. It's perfect for me. I would hate a Monday to Friday 9 to 5 job. It doesn't give you any free time to do anything. My hours are great. I have 3 days off a week. I do 29 hours, I start 8am Wednesday and finish noon on Saturday. So I can play golf, go and watch football and go on any photo trips. I would hate a job that doesn't allow me to do these things.

And to be honest I don't give a fresia what people think. It's me who counts, what I want is most important.
 

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