How to protect yourself and that which matters, your heart

This is what helped me, take it with a grain of salt. It might be for you, it might not.

Some of you know me, some of you know I am an absolute hardass. Even fewer of you know the "inside me".
At first glance you will only see the hard, outer shell. Think of me as a lump of cotton candy surrounded by a gobstopper shell.

There's a reason for this.

I value what is inside. I have been through my "trial by fire". I have lived in some horrific situations, from a decade of homelessness as a child to living with neo nazis as an adult. (I do not share their ideologies by any measure, it was a cheap place to live and I had little resources to call on)

I am sharing this for a reason. I am sharing this because I have been through the depression, the loss of hope, the utter hell... and I came out the other side alive. I want you to know there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Not all of you have access to professional psychological resources, it is expensive.. but this does not mean help is not available.
A psychologist is a guide, not unlike a GPS. If you don't have one, you can use the roadmap and find your own way. You will still arrive at the destination.

Even with professional help, you are responsible for your own mental health, just as with your physical health.

The "gold standard" for treatment of anxiety, depression and such is often CBT, Cognitive behaviour therapy. You can actually give this to yourself.

The difference between coping and not, are coping mechanisms. Unfortunately it's sometimes easier to run and hide, to blame the world than to grab it by the "short and curlies" and make it work for you. That is just a cop-out. How you choose to deal with other people and the world will define how it affects you.

Some of you might say, "Easier said than done", and you are right. But I have done it and I currently counsel other people doing the exact same thing. I didn't do this overnight, it took time.

If you feel you are ready to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and make some changes to improve your life ... here you go.

Here are some resources on CBT self help:
Cognitive behaviour therapy - Full and free course. (Available in PDF on this site)
Depression CBT Self-Help Guide (Android App)
Self Help - Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

Another skill that can be of assistance, particularly if you are a student or handle dissemination of information is critical thinking.
Oxford’s Free Course Critical Reasoning For Beginners Will Teach You to Think Like a Philosopher
Critical Thinking - (Massively Open Online Course listing) (Free)
What is critical thinking?

This here is more from a philosophical point of view. It is presented in a documentary format, it is slow but contains some very valuable information. To be honest, the acting is really corny. The second half is better than the first. For me, this was life changing.
The Pandora Project - Are you ready to awaken
(1:50 long)

If it is a bit long you may appreciate some of the videos by Sadhguru. He is the funniest philosopher I have ever seen.

One of the big skills that came in handy for me was meditation. I practice mindfulness meditation which is derived from vipassana mediation.
Vipassana how to
A shorter, efficient version, mindfulness meditation
Benefits of mindfulness meditation

In short, the reason I am functional today is because of the above things. I learned that for me, if I continued to wear my heart on my sleeve, I'd only get hurt. I didn't want to give up that which I prized, my heart and emotions. So I learned to protect them while not losing them or locking them away.

I have since been screened for depression and general issues and have consistently passed with flying colours.

Honestly, in life.. I couldn't be happier. Things are great. Even when they are not, I know how to deal with them now.

Good luck.

Great thread! I agree with you completely.