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jales

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okay just want to say;


when i came here the first person i met i made friends with.. and we emailed a lot and to me we became very close. then he met someone on this site and liked her so he stopped talking to me.

and he didnt tell me why; but his new friend posted about him saying he felt bad that someone from this site got attached to him blah blah blah. i was really hurt and decided that i will not come back to alonelylife.com

but then his new friend also wrote something else.

she wrote; as much as the people here can get on your last nerve... and as much as we dont get along at alonelylife (because we were fighting since then) DONT leave here until you find what you are looking for. Dont leave till you arent lonely anymore.

And i had no where else to go in any case.. so i took her advice.

it took me longer than a year after this time.. to meet the person on here who has become a part of me and who was what i was looking for. Before meeting him i did make a lot of other friends here though and i suppose it was all a process.

my point in all this: take her advice also... not just for this site but in general... dont give up until you have exactly what you are looking for.
Dont leave this place till you have what you came here seeking.
 
Well, even though I agree, I can't really say the same for myself. For instance, I like someone on ALL, but I don't think I'm going to try to attempt anything. It's not even the distance so much, because distance, one way or the other, can be overcome. Maybe if I weren't in the situation I'm in, having to take care of a household, then maybe I'd try. But, I'm not going to attempt anything. Even though, I'd probably be happy if I did, I'm just trying not to even get into it at all.
 
jales, your amazing and you deserve to find that person. Glad you have. You would have in any circumstances anyway. Its what you make of something. This thread is prove of that.
 
I feel positive after reading your post jales. thanks for that.
 
Thats what I came back hoping for. I hope I find..something atleast.
 
was well written, glad to see you've found someone jales, if anyone deserves it you did
 
I just wanted to say how great it is to hear about you finding someone after what had occurred before. I'm bumping this thread so more people can read about it.

I thought I found someone as well, but I ended up messing it up so bad and I will never hear from them again. I really hope I do someday, but that person will never want to have any connection with me so its only a fantasy. She wished to be left alone and I will do that, but I would be lying if I said I don't miss how things used to be between us. Seriously one of the most interesting people I have ever met is gone and it is my fault. Its going to be a tough few months.

I am really sorry for the way I acted and I hope she finds someone better in the end. I know she will.

As for myself, I just need to stick with being alone until I know I can interact with someone and not let my emotions get the best of me. To try my best to just go along with whatever comes and listen to anyone who wants to be heard.
 
Well i'm not sure what else to tell you except to remember that we all need people..

And that when emotions are very intense it is often not a good idea to bottle them up.

Talk to people about what you are going through.
And I believe that once you keep talking to people and you are real with people about who you are you will find good friends...who complete your life in a meaningful way.

I think at the end of the day that's a major part of what many of us seek.


DayvanCowboy said:
I just wanted to say how great it is to hear about you finding someone after what had occurred before. I'm bumping this thread so more people can read about it.

I thought I found someone as well, but I ended up messing it up so bad and I will never hear from them again. I really hope I do someday, but that person will never want to have any connection with me so its only a fantasy. She wished to be left alone and I will do that, but I would be lying if I said I don't miss how things used to be between us. Seriously one of the most interesting people I have ever met is gone and it is my fault. Its going to be a tough few months.

I am really sorry for the way I acted and I hope she finds someone better in the end. I know she will.

As for myself, I just need to stick with being alone until I know I can interact with someone and not let my emotions get the best of me. To try my best to just go along with whatever comes and listen to anyone who wants to be heard.
 
jales said:
Well i'm not sure what else to tell you except to remember that we all need people..

And that when emotions are very intense it is often not a good idea to bottle them up.

I agree and when my emotions have gotten intense with someone last time it ended the worst way you could think of. I thought I met somebody here, but she was the complete opposite of how she made herself to be. I let her know how I felt about things and I just got BURNED. I won't get into much further detail. I made a thread about it in the 'Miscellaneous' section.

Talk to people about what you are going through.
And I believe that once you keep talking to people and you are real with people about who you are you will find good friends...who complete your life in a meaningful way.

I think at the end of the day that's a major part of what many of us seek.

I am grateful to have the chance to interact with a lot of people here and talk to them about what I am going through. They have supported me so greatly during my breakdown and all the way to now. Really, they are the only friends I really have.
 
I'm not sure what to say except that I'm sorry you had to go through that and I hope that you do take the advice in this thread and stay until you aren't lonely any more.

Healing after going through something like what you have been through takes time and effort. Don't ignore the fact that you have to grow/heal from the pain that person caused. And don't try to heal entirely on your own but also you can't expect others to completely heal you.

I guess it's complicated and about balance. You will find what is right for you. Never stop having hope.


DayvanCowboy said:
jales said:
Well i'm not sure what else to tell you except to remember that we all need people..

And that when emotions are very intense it is often not a good idea to bottle them up.

I agree and when my emotions have gotten intense with someone last time it ended the worst way you could think of. I thought I met somebody here, but she was the complete opposite of how she made herself to be. I let her know how I felt about things and I just got BURNED. I won't get into much further detail. I made a thread about it in the 'Miscellaneous' section.

Talk to people about what you are going through.
And I believe that once you keep talking to people and you are real with people about who you are you will find good friends...who complete your life in a meaningful way.

I think at the end of the day that's a major part of what many of us seek.

I am grateful to have the chance to interact with a lot of people here and talk to them about what I am going through. They have supported me so greatly during my breakdown and all the way to now. Really, they are the only friends I really have.
 
Thank you, Jales. I agree and I do not expect everyone to just stop what they are doing and help me. That thought has never crossed my mind. Its just hard to for me to pick up and move along with things sometimes. I have met some great people here, but when I get away from this computer its tough to deal with the thoughts and knowing someone horrible is close by just living it up.

Gaining back hope will be SO hard though. I don't know how that will happen. I just had enough with everything.

You have been so great, Jales. Thank you for responding.
 
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