Midnight Sky said:
I've displayed my talent for poetry at least twice here.
It's old stuff. I haven't written anything new in about 5 years. Lyrics come to my mind all the time, but I don't write them down.
There's no motivation.
In order for anything I want to do, or used to be to be worth it, people have to think I'm worth it. That's not really happening and I don't like doing something that is going to get swept under the radar because I'm not a "notable" person, or popular in some way. So should see how I get treated by the modding community for Skyrim. They take nothing I offer seriously because I'm not a famous mod author. It's very very debilitating.
This also happens at work, and I get this from my mom a lot. If what I suggest does not "in theory" sound as if it will work.. it is dismissed automatically.
Oh yes, to quote what someone told me over facebook last year, "No one is going to care if you disappear because they don't value you".
I think I am done with this topic. There's not much more for me to say.
Sounds like negativity has got you down.
Being ignored by a modding community? I can relate, I studied games programming. I did modding for a server on zombie panic source. But people in general won't take my ideas seriously (curiously, I always find they're implemented later on).
It's sorta like this scene from Thunderbirds:
[video=youtube]
Brains proposes an airship, everyone laughs.
Then they build it.
It doesn't matter if they ignore you or not. If your idea definitely works and definitely solves the problem, you can sit smugly whilst they contort themselves trying to figure out 'some other way' (and I always love to watch people desperately try to avoid my solution in a futile effort). They will eventually fail because they aren't inclusive enough.
Then you can say 'I told you so'.
Eventually they learn (almost like dog training) to stop ignoring you and actually pay attention to what you say. You might get negative backlash, like the 'you're arrogant' comments (but to be frank if they had just listened I wouldn't have to point out how miserably they are failing their task: they are the arrogant ones because they think they can do things without including everybody).
Also, there's the 1/10 and 1/100 rule: on youtube, every 10 to 100 viewings will produce either one 'like' or one 'dislike' (10 viewings if the youtuber is popular, 100 viewings if they aren't). Which means there's a 99% of people who watch the video, but don't give an opinion. That doesn't mean to say they hated it, they may just not be bothered to voice an opinion (I can't be arsed to fight with youtube's 'log you out' system to log in to upvote one video).
So to speak, you might have a silent majority who appreciate your work who simply don't voice their opinion. Humans tend not to express appreciation (which is what I've found). The only way to know for sure is to stop doing something and to see if anyone panics or reacts. I went missing from a forum for a year, and when I came back, people I didn't even know were asking where I went.
So, don't worry if the popular (ad populum fallacy) people are jerkasses. Fame is short-lived. People who tread on other people to climb the ladder quickly find themselves on the bottom of it in due time. Skyrim will eventually become a defunct game in a few years time, replaced by some other game (in the same way Oblivion modding is now largely out of date).
Everything comes to pass.
As for poetry? Thomas Hardy, Simon Armitage. I particularly like their wordplay styles to convey a point of view that otherwise wouldn't make much sense (Thomas with the comment if he met a man in any other scene he wouldn't be shooting at him: that merely culture drives murder).
Poets often derive from their own personal experiences. You have fuel: make a fire.
