An outcry!

[BrokenInside]

Hello Folks!
I am a newbie here. My problem is slightly different but not unusual.I am not a neglected person and i have a huge social circle.My family and friends love me like anything yet i feel lonely. I have always been an introvert as far as my own feelings are concerned. People who know me, think i am a very jolly, lively and sensible girl but that's on the surface, deep inside i am a child who struggles with her woes every single day. My life hasn't been smooth but that's not the issue right now.I do have days when i don't feel like talking to anyone.I ignore phone calls, don't respond anyone on facebook but then i get back to normal state.And yes,I have already ruled out all personality disorders and other psychiatric conditions.
I have so many caring people around, even then i cant open up to any of them. I know i am being ungrateful but this love is not enough. I want to be understood by one person who can accept me with all my childishness and insanity. There is another problem that I am attracted to damaged people. A broken,struggling,quiet geek would attract me more than a handsome business tycoon.
I am sick of being lonely and i want to love and to be loved by someone madly. I don't know if anyone here feels the same way. Sorry about this novel, just wanted to vent out.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Vent away, welcome. What you are looking for isn't too much to ask, we all want someone who understands and gets us. Why do you feel you can't open up to the people around you?

 

[BrokenInside]

Gracious Probably because i don't want to show my weaker side to anyone. As i mentioned above that i am still a kid deep down. I did open up to two people in the past but somehow we couldn't make it through.They didn't like my clinginess

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Have you accpeted yourself with all your childishness and insanities?

Maybe you're loneliness is just a feeling you have gotten accustom to...

Would you simply just ALLOW yourself to FEEL GOOD and HAPPY.
Obviously outside conditions isnt dictating what you're feeling inside.

Making a gratitude and apprication list will assist you in generating
positive thoughts and feelings....
You can proactively or practice taking control over this.
It's as simple as counting 1,2,3....
It's so simple and easy...most people over look it or dont do it.
Kind of like one of those personal hygene or daily maintence....such as brushing your teeth.
Maintaining your spirit, positive thought and feelings. The inside job as well.

 

[BrokenInside]

Thank you for your response Lonesome crow I know all these things and i do practice em, that's how i get back to the normal state. I really appreciate the love and care people give to me. But i need a lover's love!

 

[Gutted]

Welcome to ALL. Where you can be as Childish and as Insane as you like! (Almost)

 

[BrokenInside]

I feel so privileged Gutted, Thank you

 

[Bill Compton]

Hello Folks!
I am a newbie here. My problem is slightly different but not unusual.I am not a neglected person and i have a huge social circle.My family and friends love me like anything yet i feel lonely. I have always been an introvert as far as my own feelings are concerned. People who know me, think i am a very jolly, lively and sensible girl but that's on the surface, deep inside i am a child who struggles with her woes every single day. My life hasn't been smooth but that's not the issue right now.I do have days when i don't feel like talking to anyone.I ignore phone calls, don't respond anyone on facebook but then i get back to normal state.And yes,I have already ruled out all personality disorders and other psychiatric conditions.
I have so many caring people around, even then i cant open up to any of them. I know i am being ungrateful but this love is not enough. I want to be understood by one person who can accept me with all my childishness and insanity. There is another problem that I am attracted to damaged people. A broken,struggling,quiet geek would attract me more than a handsome business tycoon.
I am sick of being lonely and i want to love and to be loved by someone madly. I don't know if anyone here feels the same way. Sorry about this novel, just wanted to vent out.

Wow, I totally understand this. I have friends and good family but really have off days. I'm not clinically depressed but I think I'm too nice for my own good, lay my heart out on the line and it just gets abused.

Maybe we just live in a world were being nice seems to get you less far but as you said that your attracted to broken people I am too. A lot of my friends (in particular the girls) think I always attract nightmare people, but for me someone with a big heart is so much better than the a self-indulged ignorant person. Still I've lived in London so I've seen selfishness and loneliness at its worst...

We all want someone to love and I guess its about finding that right person who loves you unconditionally and makes you happy.... if anyone knows where I can find such gem message back!

 

[BrokenInside]

Wow, I totally understand this. I have friends and good family but really have off days. I'm not clinically depressed but I think I'm too nice for my own good, lay my heart out on the line and it just gets abused.

Maybe we just live in a world were being nice seems to get you less far but as you said that your attracted to broken people I am too. A lot of my friends (in particular the girls) think I always attract nightmare people, but for me someone with a big heart is so much better than the a self-indulged ignorant person. Still I've lived in London so I've seen selfishness and loneliness at its worst...

We all want someone to love and I guess its about finding that right person who loves you unconditionally and makes you happy.... if anyone knows where I can find such gem message back!
[/quote]
You are so right Bill our heart just gets abused. My friends say that i am too sweet to be real and that's why many new people i meet, raise their eyebrow when i try to be nice with them.
I wish i could buy him from store...aahh

 

[Bill Compton]

Wow, I totally understand this. I have friends and good family but really have off days. I'm not clinically depressed but I think I'm too nice for my own good, lay my heart out on the line and it just gets abused.

Maybe we just live in a world were being nice seems to get you less far but as you said that your attracted to broken people I am too. A lot of my friends (in particular the girls) think I always attract nightmare people, but for me someone with a big heart is so much better than the a self-indulged ignorant person. Still I've lived in London so I've seen selfishness and loneliness at its worst...

We all want someone to love and I guess its about finding that right person who loves you unconditionally and makes you happy.... if anyone knows where I can find such gem message back!

You are so right Bill our heart just gets abused. My friends say that i am too sweet to be real and that's why many new people i meet, raise their eyebrow when i try to be nice with them.
I wish i could buy him from store...aahh
[/quote]

I guess society isn't built that way... maybe we should approach new relationships in a different way right? How about someone earning your trust, and time.. don't give too much away too soon. If you truly value yourself then you should give your heart away so easily....

I'm popping to the shops tomorrow!
x

---

Wow, I totally understand this. I have friends and good family but really have off days. I'm not clinically depressed but I think I'm too nice for my own good, lay my heart out on the line and it just gets abused.

Maybe we just live in a world were being nice seems to get you less far but as you said that your attracted to broken people I am too. A lot of my friends (in particular the girls) think I always attract nightmare people, but for me someone with a big heart is so much better than the a self-indulged ignorant person. Still I've lived in London so I've seen selfishness and loneliness at its worst...

We all want someone to love and I guess its about finding that right person who loves you unconditionally and makes you happy.... if anyone knows where I can find such gem message back!

You are so right Bill our heart just gets abused. My friends say that i am too sweet to be real and that's why many new people i meet, raise their eyebrow when i try to be nice with them.
I wish i could buy him from store...aahh

I guess society isn't built that way... maybe we should approach new relationships in a different way right? How about someone earning your trust, and time.. don't give too much away too soon. If you truly value yourself then you should give your heart away so easily....

I'm popping to the shops tomorrow!
x
[/quote]

oops... *shouldn't

 

[BrokenInside]

Lol who say i am gonna shop tomorrow
That's my problem Bill and i assume yours too, i trust people too quickly. I don't doubt anyone unless he/she does something wrong. And i am not so good at defending myself. People say unkind things to me but i can't hit em back instantly. These things bother me a lot and i keep thinking the words i could have said in response.And I can't be rude to em in later meetings...

 

[Veilside05]

Hello Folks!
I am a newbie here. My problem is slightly different but not unusual.I am not a neglected person and i have a huge social circle.My family and friends love me like anything yet i feel lonely. I have always been an introvert as far as my own feelings are concerned. People who know me, think i am a very jolly, lively and sensible girl but that's on the surface, deep inside i am a child who struggles with her woes every single day. My life hasn't been smooth but that's not the issue right now.I do have days when i don't feel like talking to anyone.I ignore phone calls, don't respond anyone on facebook but then i get back to normal state.And yes,I have already ruled out all personality disorders and other psychiatric conditions.
I have so many caring people around, even then i cant open up to any of them. I know i am being ungrateful but this love is not enough. I want to be understood by one person who can accept me with all my childishness and insanity. There is another problem that I am attracted to damaged people. A broken,struggling,quiet geek would attract me more than a handsome business tycoon.
I am sick of being lonely and i want to love and to be loved by someone madly. I don't know if anyone here feels the same way. Sorry about this novel, just wanted to vent out.

You sounds like a female version of me. I have loads of friends and also more towards introvert personally. I too have personal issues which I never open up to anyone because I feel that this are my own issues and there is no need to let others know. This is my own feeling - is it the fear of none acceptance that leads us to not be ourselves every moment.

Recently, I had a chance to go through a personality test and my consultant commented that its seems like my not opening up is a self built defence inside me. With lesser people knowing my true self, I feel safer. I am still pondering.

One question - do you have high self esteem?

 

[BrokenInside]

You sounds like a female version of me. I have loads of friends and also more towards introvert personally. I too have personal issues which I never open up to anyone because I feel that this are my own issues and there is no need to let others know. This is my own feeling - is it the fear of none acceptance that leads us to not be ourselves every moment.

Recently, I had a chance to go through a personality test and my consultant commented that its seems like my not opening up is a self built defence inside me. With lesser people knowing my true self, I feel safer. I am still pondering.

One question - do you have high self esteem?
[/quote]
Yeah may be we are little paranoid. I try sharing myself with other people but then i think what if they don't get my point. Everyone thinks differently. Lets make it simple by taking the example of "Picture Perception test". Everyone will describe it in their own way. I want to be understood exactly the way i am thinking but unfortunately i mostly end up explaining myself and i hate it. So, i prefer staying in my shell (our ultimate defence).
No, i never had. I blame my parents for that. They are way too overprotective and infused too much values in to their kids. Be humble, be submissive, be foregoing, be polite..blah blah and that's the result

 

[Bill Compton]

You sounds like a female version of me. I have loads of friends and also more towards introvert personally. I too have personal issues which I never open up to anyone because I feel that this are my own issues and there is no need to let others know. This is my own feeling - is it the fear of none acceptance that leads us to not be ourselves every moment.

Recently, I had a chance to go through a personality test and my consultant commented that its seems like my not opening up is a self built defence inside me. With lesser people knowing my true self, I feel safer. I am still pondering.

One question - do you have high self esteem?

Yeah may be we are little paranoid. I try sharing myself with other people but then i think what if they don't get my point. Everyone thinks differently. Lets make it simple by taking the example of "Picture Perception test". Everyone will describe it in their own way. I want to be understood exactly the way i am thinking but unfortunately i mostly end up explaining myself and i hate it. So, i prefer staying in my shell (our ultimate defence).
No, i never had. I blame my parents for that. They are way too overprotective and infused too much values in to their kids. Be humble, be submissive, be foregoing, be polite..blah blah and that's the result
[/quote]

You guys shouldn't feel like you have to open up to everyone. Silence is an underrated thing. If your comfortable in silence with someone its a really good sign of how comfortable you are. Having to explain yourself isn't something you should feel compelled to do. If that person/s don't 'get' you then maybe they're not worth knowing in the first place.

I like to think true friends like you 'warts n all'!

 

[tom_lonely]

Hello Folks!
I am a newbie here. My problem is slightly different but not unusual.I am not a neglected person and i have a huge social circle.My family and friends love me like anything yet i feel lonely. I have always been an introvert as far as my own feelings are concerned. People who know me, think i am a very jolly, lively and sensible girl but that's on the surface, deep inside i am a child who struggles with her woes every single day. My life hasn't been smooth but that's not the issue right now.I do have days when i don't feel like talking to anyone.I ignore phone calls, don't respond anyone on facebook but then i get back to normal state.And yes,I have already ruled out all personality disorders and other psychiatric conditions.
I have so many caring people around, even then i cant open up to any of them. I know i am being ungrateful but this love is not enough. I want to be understood by one person who can accept me with all my childishness and insanity. There is another problem that I am attracted to damaged people. A broken,struggling,quiet geek would attract me more than a handsome business tycoon.
I am sick of being lonely and i want to love and to be loved by someone madly. I don't know if anyone here feels the same way. Sorry about this novel, just wanted to vent out.

One idea I have been exposed to while participating in the 12 steps is the idea that only a relationship with God can fill the void we feel. Nothing else can satisfy our souls.

I am not suggesting that you should believe this. You'll have to decide if the statement above is true or not. I am just offering one possible explanation for the emptiness you feel inside.

 

[BrokenInside]

You sounds like a female version of me. I have loads of friends and also more towards introvert personally. I too have personal issues which I never open up to anyone because I feel that this are my own issues and there is no need to let others know. This is my own feeling - is it the fear of none acceptance that leads us to not be ourselves every moment.

Recently, I had a chance to go through a personality test and my consultant commented that its seems like my not opening up is a self built defence inside me. With lesser people knowing my true self, I feel safer. I am still pondering.

One question - do you have high self esteem?

Yeah may be we are little paranoid. I try sharing myself with other people but then i think what if they don't get my point. Everyone thinks differently. Lets make it simple by taking the example of "Picture Perception test". Everyone will describe it in their own way. I want to be understood exactly the way i am thinking but unfortunately i mostly end up explaining myself and i hate it. So, i prefer staying in my shell (our ultimate defence).
No, i never had. I blame my parents for that. They are way too overprotective and infused too much values in to their kids. Be humble, be submissive, be foregoing, be polite..blah blah and that's the result

You guys shouldn't feel like you have to open up to everyone. Silence is an underrated thing. If your comfortable in silence with someone its a really good sign of how comfortable you are. Having to explain yourself isn't something you should feel compelled to do. If that person/s don't 'get' you then maybe they're not worth knowing in the first place.

I like to think true friends like you 'warts n all'!
[/quote]
I am honored Bill, thank you Yeah but it happens very rarely when i feel like opening up to someone. You are right!

---

Hello Folks!
I am a newbie here. My problem is slightly different but not unusual.I am not a neglected person and i have a huge social circle.My family and friends love me like anything yet i feel lonely. I have always been an introvert as far as my own feelings are concerned. People who know me, think i am a very jolly, lively and sensible girl but that's on the surface, deep inside i am a child who struggles with her woes every single day. My life hasn't been smooth but that's not the issue right now.I do have days when i don't feel like talking to anyone.I ignore phone calls, don't respond anyone on facebook but then i get back to normal state.And yes,I have already ruled out all personality disorders and other psychiatric conditions.
I have so many caring people around, even then i cant open up to any of them. I know i am being ungrateful but this love is not enough. I want to be understood by one person who can accept me with all my childishness and insanity. There is another problem that I am attracted to damaged people. A broken,struggling,quiet geek would attract me more than a handsome business tycoon.
I am sick of being lonely and i want to love and to be loved by someone madly. I don't know if anyone here feels the same way. Sorry about this novel, just wanted to vent out.

One idea I have been exposed to while participating in the 12 steps is the idea that only a relationship with God can fill the void we feel. Nothing else can satisfy our souls.

I am not suggesting that you should believe this. You'll have to decide if the statement above is true or not. I am just offering one possible explanation for the emptiness you feel inside.

I am a believer Tom.To be very honest i don't pray regularly but i do. I used to have a very strong connection with God but now it feels like He is angry with me and doesn't listen to me anymore.