This was a very interesting post and although it doesn't describe me to the letter, I had a lot of these notions in my 20s.
The good news is: NOBODY can relate to the larger society. That's the secret. Everyone is literally making things up all the time. You grow up and you see adults wearing suits and ties talking on TV. You think to yourself "They are grown ups- surely they know what they are doing/talking about". But surprise: They don't. You think that you spend most of your free time introspecting.. guess what, so do those same friends that you described as "dopamine-addicted socialites".
I know that we don't know each other, but I will believe you 100% when you say you're more of a creative person. Creativity takes a certain kind of intelligence. And intelligent people always end up in these kinds of ruts where we are trying to find ourselves. So try not to be too hard on your peers because they may not have gotten as far as you actually are.
Remember the old phrase: "Ignorance is bliss". There are a lot of blissful folks out there. Because they never sat to start to ponder the realities of life. Not yet at least. But give them grace.
Speaking totally from experience, I think that what you need is to meld and mingle into those people. Its what it took for me to snap out of it and finally accept that there is no big burgeoning historical answer for "who am I?"- I just landed in a position in my life where I was forced to mingle with everyday folks, and little by little, I became one of them. I'm just a dude who likes to hang out and its helped me better connect with folks. They can be dopamine addicts, and I can just be me. There isn't some secret society of cool kids. Everyone is just out here faking it till we make it.
I hope that you find some sense of peace and always have a comfortable place to sit.
