Ex wants back in... What to do?

[VanillaCreme]

My ex wants me back. We talked last night about it. I don't know if I really should. It's half leaning towards it, and half of me is leaning towards leaving him alone. I've never been so stuck on the fence before. He says he misses me. He misses me being his. And he played me a song last night on the piano that he claimed he wrote while thinking of me.

I think it's a bunch of ********. I think he's playing with me still. But if he is real, and if I don't get back together with him, I'll never find anyone like him. I'll never find anyone I love so much.

 

[Jesse]

My ex wants me back. We talked last night about it. I don't know if I really should. It's half leaning towards it, and half of me is leaning towards leaving him alone. I've never been so stuck on the fence before. He says he misses me. He misses me being his. And he played me a song last night on the piano that he claimed he wrote while thinking of me.

I think it's a bunch of ********. I think he's playing with me still. But if he is real, and if I don't get back together with him, I'll never find anyone like him. I'll never find anyone I love so much.

It's a tough call. I'm going through something similar with my ex-(can't say girlfriend, but we were dating exclusively)

The one thing I am sure of is that although you may not find somebody who's just like him, you may very well find somebody who you love just as much if not more. I know it may not seem like it, but just from my own experience that's what has happened to me.

I guess I don't know enough of your story to give you a good answer. If it's a trust thing, for instance if he broke your trust in some way, well that's difficult as he may be more careful this time in covering his tracks (whatever the issue may be, again I don't know exactly).

The biggest thing is, don't get back with him just out of lonliness. Make sure it's a healthy choice.

Hope that helps in some way.

 

[samba101]

Well why don't you give it another go? You can still put the breaks on and opt out if you want to. You obviously still have feelings for him. Give it another try.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

The decisions is your's to make.
Your's and your's alone to make.

Whatever decision you make..it will be the correct one for you.

Even if I did know you like the back my hands and whatever opinion I might have
about this or that, the decision would still be your's to make.

You have a chioce. The freedom of knowing you have that chioce. This is very healthy for you.

There's no garantee in life. No one knows what's going to happen tommorrow oneway or the other.
Even if you get with him and your relationship between him are great...there's no garantee that
either one of you might drop dead from the face the earth tommorrow.

We only draw from our own indiviual experience and perceptions. We can reasons with our
past experince and try to make a calulated risk or decision base upon that.

If I make this decision for you...when things gose bad you would hold me in comtemp or accountiable.
If things work out...you would give me credit and vaule yourself less as incapiable if making your
own decisions.

Freedom comes with responsiblities....som'in like that.
You are repsonsible for the decisions you make in your life....whatever the out come.
Knowing that you're responsible for your decisions...will give you great personal freedom.
There's no victim...only volunteers...The blame game stops.

Even with my own personal issues or problems...no matter how ****** up it turned out to be.
It was my decision to be with her over and over again. No matter what advice i got from anyone.
It would also be my decision to get well and move on. It's my chioce. I have a chioce.
when I love her ...it's my chioce.
When I hate myself...that too is my chioce.
When I love myself that too is my chioce

 

[Jesse]

The decisions is your's to make.
Your's and your's alone to make.

Whatever decision you make..it will be the correct one for you.

Even if I did know you like the back my hands and whatever opinion I might have
about this or that, the decision would still be your's to make.

You have a chioce. The freedom of knowing you have that chioce. This is very healthy for you.

There's no garantee in life. No one knows what's going to happen tommorrow oneway or the other.
Even if you get with him and your relationship between him are great...there's no garantee that
either one of you might drop dead from the face the earth tommorrow.

We only draw from our own indiviual experience and perceptions. We can reasons with our
past experince and try to make a calulated risk or decision base upon that.

If I make this decision for you...when things gose bad you would hold me in comtemp or accountiable.
If things work out...you would give me credit and vaule yourself less as incapiable if making your
own decisions.

Freedom comes with responsiblities....som'in like that.
You are repsonsible for the decisions you make in your life....whatever the out come.
Knowing that you're responsible for your decisions...will give you great personal freedom.

He's got a good point. I was thinking when I wrote my response that, you already know what choice you want to make, now you just have to understand why.

 

[Oceanmist23]

Yes Rocket has a very good point. It is your decision, no matter what anyone says. And I also think you already know what your decision is.

From my own personal experience I will share this with you though.
When my first boyfriend broke up with me I was devastated, and thought I would never find anyone who I would love so much, and who would love me so much in return. I wanted to get back together with him for about 4 months.

Then I met my second boyfriend, who I fell much more in love with, who at least at the time came off as more mature than the first, and who I stayed with for nearly 6 years before I decided to break it off. After almost 5 years I started having doubts about the relationship, and at first I didn't understand why. It was a feeling that suddenly struck me, like a fear sort of. Somehow I just knew it was because of the relationship. The feeling was my heart trying to tell me that the relationship needed to stop. It had gone on long enough. But my mind tried to overrule my heart, saying 'just give it more time and it will be ok'. The more time that passed the worse I felt, and the more warnings I got from my heart. I was close to breaking up with him several times since after last summer, but I just couldn't. I was too afraid that I would be making a huge mistake, that I would never find someone who I would love so much, and who would love me so much in return. Then I realised that all his good qualities were not unique. I realised that I could find someone else who had all his good qualities PLUS all the qualities I was missing from him and more. I realised I could find someone better for me. Still, I was too afraid to break it off. Maybe at this point because I was afraid of being alone, and because I was afraid of breaking the habit of being with him.

Then something happened.

I met Sanal.

A guy so wonderful it can't even be put into words. A guy so compatible with me on all possible levels that it still amazes me. A guy who has helped me realise what true love is all about. The level of love, respect, understanding and trust is higher than I've ever encountered and dreamed of.

I hope whatever decision you make that it will be the right one for you, Vanilla. I wish you all the best

 

[VanillaCreme]

It's not out of loneliness. I want him back for the simple fact I love him, and I know no one else could ever compare. Me searching for others to be with instead of him would be out of loneliness.

 

[PieBeNice]

Give him like a last chance kinda thing.

 

[MiKeY]

It's not out of loneliness. I want him back for the simple fact I love him, and I know no one else could ever compare. Me searching for others to be with instead of him would be out of loneliness.

If that's the case, then you've got to go for it. True love doesn't happen very often. If you know you love him, and you think it's worth working through, then go for it. However, if you really think he's just using you as a backup option, you've got to beat it. It's a tough call... but don't go back to him just because you think you won't be able to find anyone else; there's always someone out there.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Be very cautious, Nilla. Remember what I told you about the bad outweighing the good. If you need to, put pen to paper and make a pros and cons list. Remember the things he did that made you feel good, as well as the things he did that made you feel bad. Are the good things worth enduring the bad?
WHatever you decide, I wish you the very best.

(((((hugs)))))

 

[Papabear]

Remember... after the honeymoon phase wears off again the same problems you had before will come back.

 

[Steel]

As several others have suggested, I would think long and hard first. If the things which led to the break up in the first place have not been addressed, then they will occur again somewhere else down the line.

 

[Van Hooligan X]

If there an Ex, they are forever an ex, ex's never change...they just become co-dependant and want back in.

Tell.

Him.

To.

****.

Off.

.

besides were getting married so i NEED him out fo the picture...muahahahaha!

 

[VanillaCreme]

It's not out of loneliness. I want him back for the simple fact I love him, and I know no one else could ever compare. Me searching for others to be with instead of him would be out of loneliness.

If that's the case, then you've got to go for it. True love doesn't happen very often. If you know you love him, and you think it's worth working through, then go for it. However, if you really think he's just using you as a backup option, you've got to beat it. It's a tough call... but don't go back to him just because you think you won't be able to find anyone else; there's always someone out there.

I don't think we are each other's back up. He can get anyone he wants. That was one of the issues. I had to tell several girls to back off. And even though I can't stand this other dude, he does like me. So that isn't the issue. I don't want anyone else but him. And he claims he wants only me.

I still feel like whopping him in his face. >_>

I just might if I ever get the chance.

<_<

 

[VanillaCreme]

If there an Ex, they are forever an ex, ex's never change...they just become co-dependant and want back in.

Tell.

Him.

To.

****.

Off.

.

besides were getting married so i NEED him out fo the picture...muahahahaha!

Lol

 

[badaboom]

go with your gut feeling, if you really think hes playing you, then dont do it.

 

[DakotaDesert]

My ex wants me back. We talked last night about it. I don't know if I really should. It's half leaning towards it, and half of me is leaning towards leaving him alone. I've never been so stuck on the fence before. He says he misses me. He misses me being his. And he played me a song last night on the piano that he claimed he wrote while thinking of me.

I think it's a bunch of ********. I think he's playing with me still. But if he is real, and if I don't get back together with him, I'll never find anyone like him. I'll never find anyone I love so much.

If it breaks once it is really rare that it does not break twice. Go ahead if it is what you really want but be very carefull.