For those who are like me in every relationship had someone feign interest and discard them when someone they felt was better suited for them, is this part of our purpose? To be used repeatedly for someone else's selfishness? Is the Universe or whatever made everything hinting to us that the only relationships we will be in are disingenuous one? That it made us for this? Should we just give up or accept it? Why couldn't we be one of the people who discards and not be effected by it? I want to not care too.
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U-122
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You can be either. I personally never ever discarded anyone. I'm the one who got discarded. I gently disassociated myself or didn't act like i wanted anything at all and didn't allow things to progress into a relationship. I got rejected probably 2 times in the past and more recently one rejected my friendship and then completely ignored me like invisible garbage. Got discarded 2-3 times. I don't even remember exact numbers it was long time ago but no more than 2-3 times. It was for the better because i was young and couldn't imagine how my life would've turned out had any of them decided to keep me. There's always someone better. I'm never good enough, never perfect.
Is it part of our purpose to be used? Nobody used me in any way, nobody took advantage of me. Being with me, giving me time of day wasn't really using me as i enjoyed being with them more than they enjoyed being with me. Whatever i chose to do for them they didn't ask me. The only emotional pain they caused that will never go away is they were with me because they had nobody better at that time. As some say, they weren't my anything. It was simply my turn to be with them and their turn to be with me. After me it was someone else's turn. And so on. I can understand some/many women where i am use men for money and material things or physical labor. That's abuse. Wasn't the case with me.
Yes you can discard and not care. I wish i could do to them what they did to me but can't go back in time. I can't even approach the more recent one who doesn't give me time of day anymore. She rides the carousel 1-3 times with a new tinder date every week. Then discards them. I guess it's normal and no big deal. We always tend to look for something better. Better car, better house, better gf, better wife, better food, better country, etc. We are disposable.
Is it part of our purpose to be used? Nobody used me in any way, nobody took advantage of me. Being with me, giving me time of day wasn't really using me as i enjoyed being with them more than they enjoyed being with me. Whatever i chose to do for them they didn't ask me. The only emotional pain they caused that will never go away is they were with me because they had nobody better at that time. As some say, they weren't my anything. It was simply my turn to be with them and their turn to be with me. After me it was someone else's turn. And so on. I can understand some/many women where i am use men for money and material things or physical labor. That's abuse. Wasn't the case with me.
Yes you can discard and not care. I wish i could do to them what they did to me but can't go back in time. I can't even approach the more recent one who doesn't give me time of day anymore. She rides the carousel 1-3 times with a new tinder date every week. Then discards them. I guess it's normal and no big deal. We always tend to look for something better. Better car, better house, better gf, better wife, better food, better country, etc. We are disposable.
NoxApex(N/A)
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This kinda reminds me of this old guy named Steve that I know.
Steve runs a tire shop near the emission control warehouse I used to work at, same lot, different business.
One day the old man pulls me aside and says "Hey check out these pics" of him and this young girl partying that's his girlfriend who's obviously a good like 30 years younger than him.
I said to him "She's beautiful, congrats."
And then he said: "Yeah, but she ain't mine. I'm just building her."
"Building her," like a car, because that's what he does for a living, cause he knows she's eventually gonna leave him.
That's ****** up. Funny, but ****** up.
Steve runs a tire shop near the emission control warehouse I used to work at, same lot, different business.
One day the old man pulls me aside and says "Hey check out these pics" of him and this young girl partying that's his girlfriend who's obviously a good like 30 years younger than him.
I said to him "She's beautiful, congrats."
And then he said: "Yeah, but she ain't mine. I'm just building her."
"Building her," like a car, because that's what he does for a living, cause he knows she's eventually gonna leave him.
That's ****** up. Funny, but ****** up.
Sunless Sky
Well-known member
Sometimes I hate that I care too. Everytime my care is tested or I get hurt, it feels like a dagger of ice was plunged deep in my chest. I then close up emotionally to not show that I care or was hurt.
Despite all that however, or maybe due to a lack of experience, I still strongly believe that I can find someone out there who loves, respects, and cares about me the way I care about them. Relationships are a two way street like that.
Anyway, sucks that you are feeling that way. I know all too well how that feels but please don't give up, hang in there, you will find someone, just don't stop looking. It'll be a bumpy ride sure but that is exponentially better than giving up and living in the cold reality of loneliness.
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