Well, unfortunately it looks like I had another falling out with my female friend. She is or was just a platonic friend but it looks like it has come to another indefinite end(or hiatus). I drove her about an hour or so to a concert that I wanted to go to also. The band started over an hour past when they were suppose to. At some point I put my hand out for her to shake it and she wouldn't. I did it again and she again wouldn't shake my hand. I pretended to leave and went to my car. She followed me and again she wouldn't shake my hand but we left anyway. Why is it so important for her to shake my hand? Not sure but I suppose it's a comfort thing. If you won't shake someone's hand how can you be friends with them? The ride back was awkward. She told me I could use the bathroom at a certain place. There was no bathroom there. When I went back outside I noticed she tried to get a ride with some random stranger. I drove to her seeing her a little later and she said she was good. I left her a message saying "I hope u r ok." I called her before that but she didn't answer and I didn't leave a message. I'm not the stalker type so I deleted her number and her messages. I'm done. Hopefully I won't see her again.
Had another falling out with female friend
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painter's radio
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Try asking her if she's having a good time next time. Maybe she just didn't want to touch your hands. Could for any reason, such as she has ocd about it or maybe she noticed you not washing them when you came out of a bathroom. Some people aren't very touchy-feely. Doesn't mean they don't like you. But whatever it was, I think it's good if you forget about her.
Did you offer the shake upon maeeting, or in the concert? Why would you shake hands at a concert? Were you on drugs?
Did you offer the shake upon maeeting, or in the concert? Why would you shake hands at a concert? Were you on drugs?
ardour
Well known loser
Assuming you did nothing wrong, the way this "friend" acted around you was extremely insulting and you should probably never contact this person again.
The need to shake hands thing is a bit odd though. Actually the entire chain of events you describe is a bit odd.
The need to shake hands thing is a bit odd though. Actually the entire chain of events you describe is a bit odd.
Maybe she was uncomfortable and thought maybe you might try holding her hand. I'm just taking a guess, cause I don't know. I've heard of maybe one hand shake when you meet someone for the first time, otherwise I've never been in the situation to do it more than that or other times.
LeaningIntoTheMuse
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Do you have Aspergers? What you describe sounds like a classic case.
rdor said:
Maybe she thought it was odd too but I just thought it was a friendly thing to do. I wasn't trying to "test" her or anything. I just wanted to show her I was having a good time and make sure we were "good."
I agree with you though. I probably will not contact her again. In fact I already deleted her number from my iphone.
Please tell Leaning Into the Muse I have him on ignore although I did see his ridiculous comment(which just makes me know I made the right decision in putting him on iggy).
LeaningIntoTheMuse
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Oh wonderful. I try to help you, dude, and you ignore me. Makes me wonder if you even want any help?
LeaningIntoTheMuse
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nevermind
that doesn't sound like a "friend" relationship of any kind, or maybe something happened before that evening? Can you remember some situation before that you felt slightly off? The only thing I ever experienced remotely similar was a well-meaning guy who in spite of that was very pushy and annoying and we were stuck in a car on the way back to something, and he was trying to be friendly and wanted to hug and I was "gghhh, get away from me". but a) the car ride together was accidental b) I disliked him before that accident, so I would have never gone somewhere with him, as I found him overbearing.
I am sure you didn't do anything bad, but maybe for your peace of mind you can kindly ask if for instance it was something you said? Not in a fearful way, just because you are a mature person who wants mature relationships and is worried when someone behaves like that. Who knows, maybe that will prove 100% that *she* is the jerk, or you would learn something new anyway. That of course only if she was someone you cared for, otherwise for an acquaintance it's not worth the trouble.
I am sure you didn't do anything bad, but maybe for your peace of mind you can kindly ask if for instance it was something you said? Not in a fearful way, just because you are a mature person who wants mature relationships and is worried when someone behaves like that. Who knows, maybe that will prove 100% that *she* is the jerk, or you would learn something new anyway. That of course only if she was someone you cared for, otherwise for an acquaintance it's not worth the trouble.
B
Bei
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I'm only guessing here but maybe she thought you were trying to hold her hand? I mean from what I understood you tried shaking her hand sometime between already having said hello and before saying goodbye and people usually only shake hands when greeting someone or saying bye.
If someone tried to shake my hand randomly like that I would think it was a bit odd but I would just giggle and shake hands anyway. I wouldn't hold hands though if it was a friend. So, maybe she thought that's what you were doing.
If someone tried to shake my hand randomly like that I would think it was a bit odd but I would just giggle and shake hands anyway. I wouldn't hold hands though if it was a friend. So, maybe she thought that's what you were doing.
