Finis Spera
New member
Hi, I was searching on google for other stories of lonely and hopeless people, trying to find a reason to continue on with my life, in hopes to maybe read a story of someone with similar or worse experiences to have had found success and happiness. Thats when i came across this forum, and i'm still reading and lurking around.
a little background on me, I am a U.S. Soldier, I grew up moving around a lot, to many different countries, which brought, what I believe, the cause of my lack of social skills, i grew up in many different countries, moving around every couple years until my parents finally separated, and in each country i lived in, i could neither speak their language nor could i pass a grade in school, I've never had any friends until my late teenage years, nor have I ever had a relationship of any kind shape or form.
I grew up in solitude, and i was fine, I played video games i watched TV and i browsed the internet. I rarely would leave the house, because i could not communicate with anyone, and honestly nobody wanted to communicate with me, I had bullying problems, but i always fought back, I thought it was all normal. It wasn't until much much later that i realized that i could not maintain a friendship, i could not maintain a person to talk with even after my life finally stabilized, after the separation of my parents, and after i learned the language of the country i was than stuck in.
I realize that i'm unable to maintain an active and healthy friendship, much less a relationship with a girl. I've never even came close to such. Its a life of loneliness and hopelessness that is honestly draining me away. I feel so sad and depressed on a daily basis, that it even becomes hard to hide at work. I don't know what to do anymore.
a little background on me, I am a U.S. Soldier, I grew up moving around a lot, to many different countries, which brought, what I believe, the cause of my lack of social skills, i grew up in many different countries, moving around every couple years until my parents finally separated, and in each country i lived in, i could neither speak their language nor could i pass a grade in school, I've never had any friends until my late teenage years, nor have I ever had a relationship of any kind shape or form.
I grew up in solitude, and i was fine, I played video games i watched TV and i browsed the internet. I rarely would leave the house, because i could not communicate with anyone, and honestly nobody wanted to communicate with me, I had bullying problems, but i always fought back, I thought it was all normal. It wasn't until much much later that i realized that i could not maintain a friendship, i could not maintain a person to talk with even after my life finally stabilized, after the separation of my parents, and after i learned the language of the country i was than stuck in.
I realize that i'm unable to maintain an active and healthy friendship, much less a relationship with a girl. I've never even came close to such. Its a life of loneliness and hopelessness that is honestly draining me away. I feel so sad and depressed on a daily basis, that it even becomes hard to hide at work. I don't know what to do anymore.
