There is a girl that lives next door with her sister, she seems nice to me. We even talk to each other but I don't know why, I just feel something different for her. I want to go ahead and make her my love but I don't know somethings are just stopping me from doing so. I just think she won't accept me as love. Just getting frustrated about the relationship I have. Should I just be friends or go for it?
i don't know how to approach...
- Thread starter kennedy
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IVIZ
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I say go for it, but dont be direct with wanting to make her your love. Your going to scare her off that way, take the friend approach first. After a bit of being together and its more open to a relationship, then lay it on her. Make her your love, well ask 
dont force her. But first ask her out as friends. But dont take too long to make her yours, then your stuck in the friend zone and that sucks.
Goodluck
dont force her. But first ask her out as friends. But dont take too long to make her yours, then your stuck in the friend zone and that sucks.Goodluck
VanillaCreme
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You can always try. It either happens or it doesn't. And even then, you never know what could come of it.
D
downbythebay
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kennedy said:
You can't make her your love. You seem a bit desperate. Sorry, bud, but I think you are really jumping the gun on this one and she will probably be creeped out. You probably don't want to hear it, but it's my honest opinion.
Enchanted Girl
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I think you should ask her out, but don't think of it as making her do anything or of calling her your love. You have to take romantic relationships one step at a time. If you ask her out, the worst thing that can happen is her saying no. If you don't ask her out, though, then you're guaranteed not to have a relationship with her, so I say, go for it. Just try to remember that you can't possibly know her well enough yet to really know that she's your "love."
kennedy said:
Firstly, do not build air castles!
This is the most important step to not get hurt or drown in self-pity.
That being said, stop imagining love with her. You don't even know her properly, you don't love her and how can you even expect her to love you???
It may even appear that she is not your type at all once you get to know her a bit better. You grow tired of each other and only reason you feel attraction is that you don't want to be alone -- but you don't want it to turn out like that, do you?
Take small steps at the time. Small goals. Ask her to join you in various tasks vice versa, like going to store etc, randomly. Talk with her, see how she reacts, flirt a little, be a bit physical, make eye contact. If she pulls herself away, big deal since you did not set your goal high, you did not imagine love with her, the remorse is much smaller.
If she returns positive signs, ask her out, make sure she understands it is a date. But don't make it exclusive, just random, walk in the park etc, but do have some kind of settled plan in mind. I don't suggest movies since you won't get to know the person there at all. You may ask her hang out in your place though, and watch movie there, later... I suggest being with her for some longer periods of time, like go on a hike together for two days. But that is after first few connections are established
Be as comfortable as you can. You seem to like her, so maybe you know something you both enjoy. Pick the setting with that in mind. Be yourself.
Most important, be confident! Not building air castles is a key component in being confident. Women like confident guys. Don't say things like "I am not confident," it doesn't give you anything. If you fail, you move on, big deal. I have asked girls out, who I see every day, got rejected, next few days were awkward but time passes and everything is ok now.
S
SophiaGrace
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Get to know her better, ask her to do things with you, try and see if she gives you subtle clues as to whether she likes you or not.
At least this is how I'd go about doing it if I were you.
At least this is how I'd go about doing it if I were you.
Teenage Dream
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I'd say get to know her better, although you could possibly do that after you enter into a relationship with her. A lot of people go on dates without really knowing the other person well, but learn a lot through the first few dates. My advice would be to not seem too desperate ~
Sway
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Go flirt with her... there's nothing wrong with that, it happens everywhere... you either end up with a good friend. or better yet a girlfriend... so no harm done :S
But not seeming too desperate is important... just remember there are a million other girls out there, you have to accept the fact that she may just end up as your friend. and go for it GL bro!
But not seeming too desperate is important... just remember there are a million other girls out there, you have to accept the fact that she may just end up as your friend. and go for it GL bro!
I would advise Kennedy to consult a psychiatrist. Lesbianism in my view is a disease and thanks to latest developments in psychiatry it can be cured to a considerable extent. Since she is having such feelings even towards her neighbor I think it is high time that she seeks the services of a psychiatrist. Most probably she will be completely cured within 3 months. I read the stupid advices posted by her friends and I would like to warn Kennedy against applying them in real life.
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Nina
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I don't think the poster mentioned being female or a lesbian....I think someone else could do with a few sessions with a shrink in here and I'm not thinking it's Kennedy...
