If your your an average guy, things suck, and theres nothing you can do

[sub5male]

5' 7"

So around the same height as I am. I did find your photo in another thread and you are far better looking than I am and have decent hair for your age too. These factors are far more likley the cause of your the success with women you mentioned than your humor.

 

[TheRealCallie]

where unfortunate looking men have been factored out of the equation.

You factored yourselves out with self fulfilling prophecy

 

[okidoke]

So around the same height as I am. I did find your photo in another thread and you are far better looking than I am and have decent hair for your age too. These factors are far more likley the cause of your the success with women you mentioned than your humor.

I’m bald. Not sure what photo you saw. Anyway, if you’re hideous, find a hideous woman.

And “around” your height? Which is?

 

[okidoke]

You factored yourselves out with self fulfilling prophecy

“Yourselves”? Quit picking on me lol. I’m arguing against his talk as you are.

 

[TheRealCallie]

“Yourselves”? Quit picking on me lol. I’m arguing against his talk as you are.

What? I quoted sub5, not you. :O

 

[okidoke]

What? I quoted sub5, not you. :O

But you said “yourselves”

 

[TheRealCallie]

But you said “yourselves”

Yes, meaning people like him, not EVERYONE.

 

[sub5male]

I’m bald. Not sure what photo you saw. Anyway, if you’re hideous, find a hideous woman.

And “around” your height? Which is?

5'6-Perhaps a man's height is not as critical of a factor as it is in the US?

 

[user 190701]

You say you like him only because he was nice, but I really wonder about that statement. Was he tall? Did other women show him attention or did he show them attention and make you wish he picked you over them? Did he project confidence? If he didn't make more money then you, then maybe he still made good money or had a prestigious job?

He was just 'nice'? Really? Sorry but I'm jaded. When us guys hear a woman mention that we are 'nice' all kinds of redflags shoot up. Women don't go for 'nice' guys unless they're looking to settle down in a sexless, boring relationship because they want a provider now and are tired of playing all the games of the men that they are really sexually attracted to.

Actually women all like the same things in men

Tall
Good looking
In shape
Confident
Funny
Bravado
Makes good money

Some guys aren't tall. Some guys aren't confident. Some guys aren't funny. Some guys dont make good money. So these guys lose out.

For a men, what we like in women is far more varied. We like confident outgoing girls. We like shy, quiet girls. We like tall girls. We like short girls. We like girls who are in good shape. We like fatter girls with some meat on their bones. It's totally different.

When I say "nice," I mean genuinely nice. Not a throwaway word. The way he interacted with other people we were around was a turn-on, both male and female. He was genuinely caring and kind and respectful. But you're right that it was more than that. Just being around him put me at ease. That was what got me interested. The more I talked to him, the more I liked him.

He is maybe 5'9 - 5'10 max. He was a bit overweight. He's balding. What's left is mostly grey hair. He's not even an ethnicity I normally find attractive at all. He doesn't make good money and actually has kind of a crappy job that embarrasses him. He was laid off from a previous job that was better, but I didn't even learn this until a month after I met him. That said, I admire how hard he works despite all of this.

I own my own business and make very good money on my own. I'm an adult who has been single most of her life. I don't need a "provider." I need a companion who is fun to be with and treats me well. And that doesn't equate to sexless or boring. I've fantasized about this man every which way since I met him, and I hope that when we reunite, I can turn those fantasies into realities.

I think the fact that you are making all these assumptions about women and assuming we're all the same is probably why you don't have one. Don't mean to be harsh, but that's a major turn-off.

 

[okidoke]

5'6-Perhaps a man's height is not as critical of a factor as it is in the US?

I think it's only critical in your head.

 

[ardour]

When I say "nice," I mean genuinely nice. Not a throwaway word. The way he interacted with other people we were around was a turn-on, both male and female. He was genuinely caring and kind and respectful. But you're right that it was more than that. Just being around him put me at ease. That was what got me interested. The more I talked to him, the more I liked him.

He is maybe 5'9 - 5'10 max. He was a bit overweight. He's balding. What's left is mostly grey hair. He's not even an ethnicity I normally find attractive at all. He doesn't make good money and actually has kind of a crappy job that embarrasses him. He was laid off from a previous job that was better, but I didn't even learn this until a month after I met him. That said, I admire how hard he works despite all of this.

I own my own business and make very good money on my own. I'm an adult who has been single most of her life. I don't need a "provider." I need a companion who is fun to be with and treats me well. And that doesn't equate to sexless or boring. I've fantasized about this man every which way since I met him, and I hope that when we reunite, I can turn those fantasies into realities.

I think the fact that you are making all these assumptions about women and assuming we're all the same is probably why you don't have one. Don't mean to be harsh, but that's a major turn-off.

It's still hard not to be curious about, for example, whether you would be dating this guy if you were both 25.

 

[user 190701]

It's still hard not to be curious about, for example, whether you would be dating this guy if you were both 25.

I have no idea. I've never dated anyone my own age, they've either been at least a decade older or a decade younger. The older I get, though, the more I'm concerned with personality rather than looks.

 

[user 190541]

When I say "nice," I mean genuinely nice. Not a throwaway word. The way he interacted with other people we were around was a turn-on, both male and female. He was genuinely caring and kind and respectful. But you're right that it was more than that. Just being around him put me at ease. That was what got me interested. The more I talked to him, the more I liked him.

He is maybe 5'9 - 5'10 max. He was a bit overweight. He's balding. What's left is mostly grey hair. He's not even an ethnicity I normally find attractive at all. He doesn't make good money and actually has kind of a crappy job that embarrasses him. He was laid off from a previous job that was better, but I didn't even learn this until a month after I met him. That said, I admire how hard he works despite all of this.

I own my own business and make very good money on my own. I'm an adult who has been single most of her life. I don't need a "provider." I need a companion who is fun to be with and treats me well. And that doesn't equate to sexless or boring. I've fantasized about this man every which way since I met him, and I hope that when we reunite, I can turn those fantasies into realities.

I think the fact that you are making all these assumptions about women and assuming we're all the same is probably why you don't have one. Don't mean to be harsh, but that's a major turn-off.

It might just be the way I interpret it, but I'm seeing "nice" here as actually meaning "charismatic", and charisma in men is something that women are known to be attracted to. I imagine that many of the men here who talk about not being able to be in relationships are really nice people in real life just as well, yet that doesn't seem to make their love life any more easier. On the other hand, I don't think they're charismatic people (sorry, guys). I'm myself not a charismatic person either, yet I try to be nice... for the most part. Also, on an unrelated note, it should be noted that charismatic people, while seeming warm and inviting at first, are not uncommonly totally different people beneath the façade. To sum it up, niceness might be attractive, but I don't think it is without charisma. Not at all.

 

[user 190701]

It might just be the way I interpret it, but I'm seeing "nice" here as actually meaning "charismatic", and charisma in men is something that women are known to be attracted to. I imagine that many of the men here who talk about not being able to be in relationships are really nice people in real life just as well, yet that doesn't seem to make their love life any more easier. On the other hand, I don't think they're charismatic people (sorry, guys). I'm myself not a charismatic person either, yet I try to be nice... for the most part. Also, on an unrelated note, it should be noted that charismatic people, while seeming warm and inviting at first, are not uncommonly totally different people beneath the façade. To sum it up, niceness might be attractive, but I don't think it is without charisma. Not at all.

No, not charismatic. As I stated, to me, nice meant respectful, kind, and caring, even when the situation didn't necessarily call for it. Literally the way he treated other people, even when he didn't have to, was the first thing that made me take notice and think this guy is special.

 

[user 190541]

No, not charismatic. As I stated, to me, nice meant respectful, kind, and caring, even when the situation didn't necessarily call for it. Literally the way he treated other people, even when he didn't have to, was the first thing that made me take notice and think this guy is special.

But would you say he is not charismatic?

 

[user 190701]

But would you say he is not charismatic?

I would say that. My college friend who was with me when we met him was not impressed at all.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I would say that. My college friend who was with me when we met him was not impressed at all.

Just goes to show you, different strokes for different folks. Just because ONE person is not impressed by someone doesn't mean the person right next to them won't be.

 

[user 190541]

Hey, I can't help but try to find the basic, underlying principles behind stuff. I'm a natural scientist-philosopher.

 

[WillPower]

Well, I have another analogy....

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink.....

OMG, sexist

And yes, I'm j/k. No need to reply, but you prob will.

 

[TheRealCallie]

OMG, sexist

And yes, I'm j/k. No need to reply, but you prob will.

To be fair, I never said what *** the horse was