Im really annoyed and upset and feel really lonley.
I started seeing this guy a while back, and its got really serious. and im in love with him and everythings amazing. well i thought it was.
Im at university, and i moved quite far away from my parents. I dont have a job right now because my course is taking up too much of my time, which leaves me with hardley any money.
I used to go out with my best friends all the time, and we used to have a really good night out. but because of my money isses i cant go out much at all, i went out with them for the first time in 3 months the tuesday just gone. My friend asked me to go out again tonight, but i cant aford it, and now there all making me feel like im ingoring them and not bothering them anymore now that im with this guy. which is NOT the case. i LOVE going out with them, i so wish i could do it more often, but i cant because of money.
I get 550pounds a month. 360pounds goes to rent and another 70 goes on food for the month. (not all spent at the same time, its over the month when and if i need food) the the rest has to go for my placement. (my university stupidly put me in a placement area which is too far away, and i dont have a car so i have to get the train and its way expensive). if i have any money left over from that then it goes towards me going home every few months.
Also one of my best friends who i thought i could tell everything too, and trust that hed tell noone has started telling everyone my secrets, like my boyfriend asked me to move in with him on v day just gone which i obviously said yes too, and i told him that. he was the first person i told, and i asked him not to tell anyone, even tho i thought i was stupid for doing so because i assumed that he wouldnt tell anyone, but no he went and told all my friends, even tho i wasnt ready for them to know yet.
On top of this all being so far away from my family is starting to affect me more then i thought. i miss so much when im away, birthdays, new babies being born...my sister tryed to kill her self and i didnt even find out untill about a week later when they remembered to tell me. My nana also died not too long ago, and the worst thing was that i didnt get to say goodbye, i missed that too. and because i live so far away i didnt get to spend much time with her in the months befor she passes away.
I completley love where i am now tho, i love the people, i love my house, i love my uni, i love my friends, and i really dont want to leave, but i feel like i miss everything. and i feel like i cant do anything right with my friends. i dont even have that many anyways, i was a loser back at home and had like 2 friends, and then when i came up here i made so many friends. not on my uni course tho, they all dont like me for some reason, apparently im wiered.
its all just making me feel so lonley. I feel like i dont have anyone to talk to anymore. I feel like my family dosnt even keep me upto date anymore.
aghh this is all giving me a headake, i wish it would just all go away and be ok again, i just want to be happy and not have friends that hate me. :'( and i wish i wansnt so alone.
I started seeing this guy a while back, and its got really serious. and im in love with him and everythings amazing. well i thought it was.
Im at university, and i moved quite far away from my parents. I dont have a job right now because my course is taking up too much of my time, which leaves me with hardley any money.
I used to go out with my best friends all the time, and we used to have a really good night out. but because of my money isses i cant go out much at all, i went out with them for the first time in 3 months the tuesday just gone. My friend asked me to go out again tonight, but i cant aford it, and now there all making me feel like im ingoring them and not bothering them anymore now that im with this guy. which is NOT the case. i LOVE going out with them, i so wish i could do it more often, but i cant because of money.
I get 550pounds a month. 360pounds goes to rent and another 70 goes on food for the month. (not all spent at the same time, its over the month when and if i need food) the the rest has to go for my placement. (my university stupidly put me in a placement area which is too far away, and i dont have a car so i have to get the train and its way expensive). if i have any money left over from that then it goes towards me going home every few months.
Also one of my best friends who i thought i could tell everything too, and trust that hed tell noone has started telling everyone my secrets, like my boyfriend asked me to move in with him on v day just gone which i obviously said yes too, and i told him that. he was the first person i told, and i asked him not to tell anyone, even tho i thought i was stupid for doing so because i assumed that he wouldnt tell anyone, but no he went and told all my friends, even tho i wasnt ready for them to know yet.
On top of this all being so far away from my family is starting to affect me more then i thought. i miss so much when im away, birthdays, new babies being born...my sister tryed to kill her self and i didnt even find out untill about a week later when they remembered to tell me. My nana also died not too long ago, and the worst thing was that i didnt get to say goodbye, i missed that too. and because i live so far away i didnt get to spend much time with her in the months befor she passes away.
I completley love where i am now tho, i love the people, i love my house, i love my uni, i love my friends, and i really dont want to leave, but i feel like i miss everything. and i feel like i cant do anything right with my friends. i dont even have that many anyways, i was a loser back at home and had like 2 friends, and then when i came up here i made so many friends. not on my uni course tho, they all dont like me for some reason, apparently im wiered.
its all just making me feel so lonley. I feel like i dont have anyone to talk to anymore. I feel like my family dosnt even keep me upto date anymore.
aghh this is all giving me a headake, i wish it would just all go away and be ok again, i just want to be happy and not have friends that hate me. :'( and i wish i wansnt so alone.
