Missing someone

[Davos418]

I guess I'll start by saying I'm28 and I'm married, and I miss my wife.She is my best friend. She is overseas at the moment and I'm at home. We moved interstate recently to study at uni so I really know nobody. Even out of my old friends back where I grew up I really have very few left.
It's not like I'm codependant, in fact I thought it was the otherway round, but I guess being a broke uni student, and devoting everything to one person has left me with nothing in her absence.
So I've been home by myself for the last week, and will be for a bit longer.. I can't take it anymore. I can't barely get out of bed, I feel like my heart is exploding out of my chest. Like I might die in my sleep, and have no one around to even care. I don't have anyone to talk to... no human interaction except at uni.. but that's to the extent that anyone would have to talk to any other person in the course of a day.

It's not like she won't be back, and it's not like I don't trust her.. but she could be doing anything. I mean if she can leave me at home, why not just sleep with any dude she wants... what would make me so special that she wouldn't? Trust just isn't enough to rid my mind of those thoughts.
I love her, and I'm sure she loves me... but sometimes I just feel so damn alone, like I'm just some idiot who people talk to out of sympathy, like if I died I could be forgotten about in moments.

Does anybody ever feel any of that? Any ideas about how to combat it?
I just can't take it.

Dave

 

[rivermaze]

Hi Davos, you are lonely. I feel sorry for you.

You're saying that it's not like you don't trust her, but apparently you don't trust her at all.

I'd say don't worry about something you don't have much influence on. Maybe try to believe that she knows what she's doing. If she loves you, she doesn't cheat on you. Let her live. She's also your best friend and she deserves some freedom and trust.

You're extremely lonely and it doesn't help. It must be hard not have someone to care for around you, when you got used to it. Maybe talking to others would help to lower the tension and to silence your anxiety.

good luck.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Yes of course...especially since Ive gone through break ups or saperations within recent weeks or
months.....

Its a good thing I have plenty of photos of good times.

Its how I process my emotionss.

I bascially let go the feelings of saperations. missing, lack or wanting.

sometimes Ill talk to people about the ones I love. I text Jennifers(exgf) friend from time to time.

I keep in steady contact with Kimmie. Renae is MIA. I love and miss her very much sometimes...

I just keep that feeling of wholeness
and love I have Renae and Kimmie

Its something I practice as best I can everyday....

I do the samething with the feelings
of loneliness....I let go of that feeling as it arise. Not figure it out..Feel it then let go...and not run with that feeling.
It gets me into the moment. I make the best of life as I go. Keep a positive attitude...stuff like that.
I went to hang out at the beach today..surf and sand. Its all good.

 

[Davos418]

You're saying that it's not like you don't trust her, but apparently you don't trust her at all.

I'm not sure if it's a true trust issue. I've never had one before, but who knows.
I've been having some sort of panic attack thing going on... I was checking the news to make sure her planes hadn't crashed every hour or so. I'm scared out of my brain that I'm going to have a heart attack or stroke and die and then never see her again.
I'm sure it's all in my head, but it just isn't fun.

Anyway, thanks for the advice guys.

I'm going to work on it

 

[rivermaze]

I'm not sure if it's a true trust issue. I've never had one before, but who knows.
I've been having some sort of panic attack thing going on... I was checking the news to make sure her planes hadn't crashed every hour or so. I'm scared out of my brain that I'm going to have a heart attack or stroke and die and then never see her again.
I'm sure it's all in my head, but it just isn't fun.

Anyway, thanks for the advice guys.

I'm going to work on it

Hi Davos, I get it. I'm sorry for missing the point. I can be wrong so easily. I know that you love her. It's so romantic. I guess that I would worry as well.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Yeah...u start to obsess over things you
have no control over...and it just gose
spinning in ur head...which waste lots
of time and energy..

To stop the cycle...just let go and not figure it out.

it just takes a little practice but after a while youll get use to being in a state
of piece..then you can focus your attention to being productive in your own life or well being.
Or refocus to happy thoughts and feelings instead.