new girl....step one

michco1982 · Aug 27, 2009

hi all...im making a giant leap because for so long now i was too proud or embarressed to admit that i was lonely.ive always had a bit of anxiety,undiagnosed, but i live with it. a lot of the time i just fake confidence...it helps till the next day when im analysing everything i said or how i looked,what they thought,what an idiot i am, etc. i can be pretty tough on myself internally, but exude this state of normality to others so as they never have a clue whats going on im my head.sounds mad written down but hopefully somebody will get it.
anyway its great to find a place where i can talk about it an not feel inadiquate(for once). xx

Minus · Aug 27, 2009

Welcome to the forum

Nyktimos · Aug 27, 2009

Welcome to the forum Michco. I hope you find you can be yourself here.

Valentine Muthomi · Aug 27, 2009

stop being so hard on yourself

http://www.alonelylife.com/images/smilies/smile.gif

Steel · Aug 27, 2009

Hey, and welcome.

daisyk · Aug 27, 2009

michco1982 said:
hi all...im making a giant leap because for so long now i was too proud or embarressed to admit that i was lonely.ive always had a bit of anxiety,undiagnosed, but i live with it. a lot of the time i just fake confidence...it helps till the next day when im analysing everything i said or how i looked,what they thought,what an idiot i am, etc. i can be pretty tough on myself internally, but exude this state of normality to others so as they never have a clue whats going on im my head.sounds mad written down but hopefully somebody will get it.
anyway its great to find a place where i can talk about it an not feel inadiquate(for once). xx

Hi new girl,
I get it about faking confidence and acting normal. At my age I am still "working on myself"; I don't beat up on myself like I did when I was young; am more accepting of myself but I need to put more effort into finding a few people I actually want to be around.