Not Sure What To Expect

[tasteoftravesty]

Heya Everyone.

My name is TJ. I am 21 years old, male, and live in Minnesota

I am not how relevant this is but I am gay. I googled "How to prevent being lonely and gay" and this forum popped up so I decided to give it a go.

Tonight my events were as followed: grabbing a liter of wine, making a hot bubble bath, burning incense, playing music, and shutting off all the lights. After drinking for a little bit I sat on my couch and ate 5 raw carrots in the nude.

I just got out of a year long relationship, we were engagement for 6 months. Not really that long in retrospect but it sucks nonetheless. All I have left to show for it is meaningless ring and an empty apartment.
I am 'seeing' this guy, but it is more out of convinence then anything else.

Looking back at my previous relationships I have realized that I have no idea what love feels like. I can say I love someone, but what does that even feel like? I thought my body was suppose to have butterflies or shouldnt I sweat uncontrollably--anything?

I am not even sure what compelled me to create an membership here. Although I have had relationships, and I have people around me I still feel lonely. I don't think my friends understand me. They recognize I can get most guys, I am not bad looking or anything. But as far as loving someone or really anything I just cant. I dont even know the difference between love and like to be honest. I am sure there is someone in the same boat as me.

I guess I am just looking for people with similar backgrounds. I feel like I have my professional life in a working progress and it is going well. Its just my emotional life that is constantly back and forth. I am young and I realize I have time, I am just curious if there are people who have been there the same thing and how they handle the situations. I feel like I am in limbo.

 

[rivermaze]

...

Looking back at my previous relationships I have realized that I have no idea what love feels like. I can say I love someone, but what does that even feel like? I thought my body was suppose to have butterflies or shouldnt I sweat uncontrollably--anything?

...But as far as loving someone or really anything I just cant. I dont even know the difference between love and like to be honest. I am sure there is someone in the same boat as me.

I guess I am just looking for people with similar backgrounds....

Hi TJ,

I don't think that I'm in the same boat in terms of similar experience. However, there is a good chance for finding someone on this forum to share your thoughts. Not gay necessarily, but there are plenty of sensitive and trustworthy individuals around.

I wouldn't worry about defining love and like. It's so individual that everyone experience these feelings differently. I don't think that you have to undergo physiological changes to be sure whether something you feel is love or not. I guess it's more about what you're are ready to offer (and sacrifice), and responsibility to someone else. I've been married for over 8 years, and my love now is something completely different than it was at the beginning. Feelings change in time like you are

Good luck and take care!

 

[Poguesy]

G'day