so lonely cant sleep

[SighX99]

i cant sleep. i cant stop thinking about all the failed attempts ive had at getting into a relationship... cant stop thinking about contant fallout with friends... cant stop thinking about death, how no one will be at my funeral... how ****** i am at making friends... how girls never seem to want to talk to me... cant stop thinking about how lonely i really am in this world. how no one is my real friend anymore....how someone was interested in me over the internet, after i send them my pictures they stopped emailing me, and this happened 3 times.

a girl i was interested back 11 weeks ago, we talked for a bit... bleh blah bleh, then last week of class she straight up avoided me right in front of my face. she saw me walking the opposite way, our eyes met, then she just turned around and walked the other way.... ****** up ****... noone ****** likes me one ****** bit **** you

how i wish i could go back in time and fix all my relationships, which will never happen. how ****** poor i am, how pathetic i am sometimes i take long drives to nowhere to waste time, to avoid human contact, because more human contact means more sorrow

i ****** hate my life. **** everyone in my ****** life. i hate everything except this forum.

 

[SophiaGrace]

(((((((((((((( ((((((((((((((((Sigh X99))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))

 

[Lebowski]

i agree. although i'm sure you're not that ugly. i've also have the thoughts of no one being at my funeral. all you can do though is keep your head up though.

 

[PoWer2tHePeOpLE]

know the feeling all too well bro.

its all pretty ******.

peace.

 

[nairda]

i remember when i was in the same exact mindset as you sighx99. i slipped into a pretty severe case of depression. you know what helps a little though? exercise. you might think its stupid but going to the gym greatly relieved my depression. it'll keep your mind off things as you focus on improving your health

 

[SighX99]

ITS ALL ****** CYCLICAL......

i feel good for a couple of weeks. not feeling depressed at all... then it all comes back, then goes away again, then comes back.....

and i swear to god, i have the worst luck, so bad, that i think its a curse... so bad, that i can predict the future, before i do anything, before i try to accomplish something, IT NEVER ****** WORKS OUT, EVER. the worst ****** circumstances always somehow come together against me, all the ****** time.

i have soooo many examples: this girl i hooked up with, she wanted to talk more...so she calls me right? one time by accident i lost my phone charger... she called right before my phone died. i told her i lost my charger so my phone could go any minute, told her id call her tommrow then phone dies... next day i called like 6 times... she didnt pick up... for the next week or so i kept trying to call her... she never picked up, havent talked to her since... lost her number... then i saw her at a dog park, wasnt sure if it was her.. wouldve been awkward..... BUT **** SHOULDVE ASKED

i was about to **** this chick at the rainbow gathering then she just said she was too tired... ****

i had a girl who was crazy about me in high school... for some ****** reason i never made the move at the right time.. when i did, i had already fell into the friend zone .. ****. she was the LOVE OF MY LIFE ******* IT, then she turned around and hooked up with my best friend... in front of my face...****. no one but her apologized after like 3 years, and it was after her boyfriend had read her myspace and found my depressing letter, got super pissed at me, wrote some mean ****. THEN SHE APOLOGIZED... ****

i really wanted to kill myself last week. i wanted to hang myself sitting down to show people how much i wanted to die.



anyone know any ways to break a bad luck curse? or to know if you are cursed?

heres something really trippy...

the reason why i think im cursed its because my late grandfather back in taiwan supposedly promised a dead female ghost a wedding in the after life... but my grandfather never gave her the wedding, so the ghost is pissed and therfore cursed my family... in turn, im cursed.
'

im sure that no one is gonna read this ****** post or care about this thread, just the nature of my luck... circumstances always makes me feel alone no matter what, you just ****** see

 

[Lonesome Crow]

People usually substitute with *** after they stop using...

 

[heretostay]

there's a good book out there called Feeling Good by David Burns. i know you're thinking a stupid book isnt going to help you, but its worth a try. Burns mentions a lot of your thinking patterns in his book; predicting the future, blanket statements, all and nothing statements, etc. if you can change the way you think, you can start to feel better.