springbreak blues..

man of one · Apr 9, 2010

this springbreak i didn't do absolutely nothing as all years and to tell you the truth i like it i like doing nothing and not having plans i hate going out,clubs,dressing up partying etc. but the problem is no girl will like this and springbreak reminded and threw the "you will never have a chance with a girl" in my face..

cuz you see every girl i end up liking is the opposite (for example.girl i like right now was partying this springbreak on the beach while i was home playing wii sports) so im somewhat of a loser/loner in they're eyes. What usually happens is i fall in love then think i have a chance but then..STOP! i realize she will not like how i am no girl will i mean what if we get together she will be like lets go out this saturday i will not wanna go and in little time she will dump me cuz they are alot better guys out there so im screwed...even girls that get interested in me just by looks(not trying to brag) i ignore cuz i say to myself she will never like you when she gets to know you and sadly that's the truth all girls i've met like going out havent met one like me yet..i dont know what to do really..

Remedy · Apr 9, 2010

I'm sorry to be blunt but the problem is your unwillingness to get out there and try and the fact that you have a defeatist attitude. I can understand though, because I'm the same but we both need to try to get out there. You say that there are girls that have been interested in you, yet they became uninterested after you got to know them. From the way it sounds, it sounds like you have a defeatist attitude. I know cause I have it myself.

Girls can probably pick up on this and just don't want to put the effort in. People don't usually end up liking someone who isn't comfortable with themselves or think they stand no chance with someone. It's like they are talking to you and are interested in you. Yet, you are shoving it back in their face because you don't allow them to get to know the real you. I don't know how to describe it but, it's like you are acting like you are not worthy but this person is showing you that you are. By being interested enough in you to talk to you. It's like getting a compliment and disregarding it/shoving it back in their face like I said.

You have to get yourself out there instead of playing video games. Don't allow yourself be defeated by your own worst enemy, yourself. I'm trying to overcome such a problem myself. My friends have told me that they can't believe I'm single or like that I'm a great guy. I'm sure people say the same about you. You sound like a good person , but you are just restraining yourself from being the real "you". You are not allowing anyone to like you. Break out of it and tell yourself that you ARE worthy. You have some girls interested in you because of your looks. Some guys don't have that opportunity sometimes. So you are already blessed in one area. Now it's just about working on yourself and not feeling defeated.

I need to take some of my own advice gah 0_o. I just hope I was helpful and some that some of my advice wasn't stupid.

Carcass Raid · Apr 9, 2010

Honestly, if you meet the right girl...you'll wanna go out wherever she wants to. That's how I felt anyway. I dunno if you'll be the same. When you meet the right girl...God, you'll just want to do anything with her and you'll come out of your shell in no time. Hell, I'm about to move from Louisiana to Pennsylvania to be with the girl of my dreams and I'm terrified but...I know that we'll be perfect together <3.

I dunno if I helped at all D: I think you'll be okay though. Not everyone is a party animal.

man of one · Apr 10, 2010

remedy - yes you are right even though i said i like being alone and not going out i sometimes feel the restriction i have created myself and it pretty much makes me miss life and i have missed it i have not had a normal life so far and now i am just afraid of going out with girls and all that cuz i have 0 experience and im 20 and by this age im suppose to you know be a pro with girls but im not...it's just a matter of somehow trying to do something new even if im uncomfortable as hell i gotta try and you should try too i wish you luck in your similar scenario and thanks for being blunt lol it's nice to hear the real truth...btw what is your situation you got a girl you like as well?

Carcass Raid- YES! i have felt that as well i have fallen so in love with some girls that my mind was like f*ck it im gonna go out if she says yes cuz i want her! but those girls never gave me a chance my shyness and visible lack of experience screwed it up i'll just have to wait i guess to see if a girl i truly like likes me back im hoping this girl i like changes her mind and starts giving me a break since she already kinda rejected me but i like her alot...i hope i get what you have one day good luck on the move man be brave! haha..

Remedy · Apr 10, 2010

I'm sorry man of one, that came out a lot more harsh then I expected. I might have been talking to myself as well that's why I was so harsh. Since I have a problem with putting myself down. I shouldn't have said it that way but I was really trying to help you.

Just keep trying to improve with girls if you don't feel content being alone. There are plenty of guys including myself, who are over 20 and have no experience with women. There are girls out there who will look past that if you show how awesome you are and I'm sure you are if you tried. You already have had girls attracted to you because of your looks so be thankful that you are one step ahead

.

I'm really sorry though it came a lot more mean then I expected. LIke I said many things you do and how you feel about yourself is very similar to me. So I probably wasn't just talking to you but myself as well. I hope you know I meant well.

man of one · Apr 10, 2010

Remedy said:
I'm sorry man of one, that came out a lot more harsh then I expected. I might have been talking to myself as well that's why I was so harsh. Since I have a problem with putting myself down. I shouldn't have said it that way but I was really trying to help you.

Just keep trying to improve with girls if you don't feel content being alone. There are plenty of guys including myself, who are over 20 and have no experience with women. There are girls out there who will look past that if you show how awesome you are and I'm sure you are if you tried. You already have had girls attracted to you because of your looks so be thankful that you are one step ahead .

I'm really sorry though it came a lot more mean then I expected. LIke I said many things you do and how you feel about yourself is very similar to me. So I probably wasn't just talking to you but myself as well. I hope you know I meant well.

haha dude its ok i know what you meant and you said it just fine you wheren't mean at all you just said the truth and went to the point and for that i thank you we are real alike from what i have heard you say haha....lol about my looks im average looking like only some girls have find me good looking and some haven't just depends on they're taste...and if you dont mind me asking what is your situation right now any girls you like? you dont have to answer if you dont want to