Starting life again at 18

[ValleyWalls]

Hi, new to this site

This may sound like a really stupid idea and please tell if you think it is.

I'm in my teenage years (male) and i really suffer with loneliness. I'm not the most lonely (i have a few friends etc) but i spend my life in sixth form on my own with people who just don't notice me and it's my fault really. It's happened all my life and i really want/need a fresh start

So, what i'm planning to do is when i'm 18 (in 2 months) i'm going to move to London gradually (staying at relatives' nearby etc) and when finally i'm down there i'm gonna change my name by deed poll and completely change my appearance so i'm a new person with no past to be discovered. I feel best when i'm somewhere where no-one knows me so when i'm abroad i'm a diferent person.

Good idea?

 

[ZENX49]

I'm gonna level with you. Being a new person won't eliminate your past issues. On top of that, the financial debts incurred on such ventures will come to plague this "new life" you're talking about. You'll start off knowing no one and under a mountain and a half of debt with no one to count on if something should happen to you.

As glamorous an idea as having a fresh start may be, it's still a glamor concept. One that in practice is horrendously unforgiving.

 

[passage]

Why bother changing your name and appearance (surgery, or just clothing?) if your in a new city anyway. No one knows about your past in a new city, excpet maybe relatives.

 

[flaneur]

I hate to sound like my father, but you shouldn't run away from your problems.

 

[IgnoredOne]

No need to change your name, you're getting a new start in a new city already.

 

[Ak5]

Starting new is a great idea, go for it.

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Yeah, I'd echo the other responses. No need to go overboard, if you're moving somewhere new it's a fresh page anyway.

Plus changing your name won't magically cure any issues you feel you had in life, it'll just transfer them in the future to your "new" identity. Just make the changes you feel happy with to your lifestyle and treat it all as a new beginning

 

[Sci-Fi]

Changing your name or appearance won't help you escape your past. It's part of you, and nothing short of a lobotomy will make it all disappear. Man up and accept your past. You can still carve a new path for yourself and a new life. What's done is done, you learn from it and become a better man.

 

[In a lonely place]

Good luck, whatever you do, I admire your courage at moving to a new place.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

My life had been full of changes.
Ive attended college. Joined the USAF.
Played in metal bands.
Got married and devioced.
Been in LT relationships.
Been singled and played the scenes.
Changed careers serval times.
Lived in various states and cities.
Lived in different country.

My life had gone through many changes
Within this past year. Im currently living in a town
Which ive never been.
Im 45 and im starting a new life.

Yes sometimes i act out or do a lot things
Because im a stranger in town...knowing
I wont stick around for long. I didnt worry
Too much what others think of me or my reputations.

I guess i can essily give people or strangers different names.
I do enjoy meeting differnt people or culture.
As a child i was ship from relatives to relatives.
I had to attend different schools and make new
friends often.
Dont worry...plenty of people change their
Names, appearance or life style all the time.

ITs call EVOLUTION or GROWNING UP...EXPANDING.
LEARNING, CHANGING AS YOU GROW.

Heck i dont wear the same clothe or hair style when i was 25.

Yeah....changes are healthy.

---

YOU'RE NOT A NURATIC....
NURATIC PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO CHANGE.

 

[Lost Drifter]

Slightly off topic but I wish you younger folks wouldn’t be so hard on yourselves during your teenage years. At that time in life you’re essentially in tutorial mode where you are expected to be making mistakes as you learn and develop. You can’t fail as a teenager simply because it’s all one big learning curve.

 

[HappyYogi]

I guess I disagree with the others here.

I think if your inner self feels like a name/location change would help, it probably would!

A change often does us good. I DO believe in "fresh starts". Yes, because a "fresh start" can by symbolic of the leaving of the "old you" for the "new you".

Many people have felt renewed and replenished with a FRESH START.

I'd personally LOVE a fresh start...I can't move. I am in relationship. But I am hoping to give myself a fresh start with totally decluttering my home. I can't wait...it will feel good.

Any thing you do new in life that is positive can be a fresh start.

Oh, I agree with one thing, a lot of us have fresh starts through out our lives. I've had many, get used to it.

Good luck and go for it!

---

Valley Wells~

Your post reminded me of a book I have. A book I've had for a long time. It's an "Idiot's Guide" and it's "How to Re-Invent yourself" or something like that. I still have but it's tucked away somewhere. It's one of my "keepers". You might find it inspiring.