Fergus
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jan 25, 2009
- Messages
- 50
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I have the feeling that everybody hates me and my dream is dying.
I'm sure that a lot of people among my fellow students in the university hate me because I achieved something important whereas I didn't deserve this success. This is linked with competition and my loneliness (loners are black sheeps, aren't they?). I can sense this contempt everyday. I'm screwing this year, my moral is constantly low, and I'm lonely, of course.
Today I was told by the worst teacher ever that my dream will certainly be destroyed because I'm so bad in his subject. We hate each other silently. In fact a lot of students hate him and he despises many among us. But I feel surrounded by hatred. Even my former friends don't like me as I didn't go to their binge drinking parties or rarely called back (shyness...).
My success: I was selected like some other people to study abroad next year. That's my dream. But it's threatened by my unability to cope with the current situation and with my fear. I'm lying to my parents as I don't want them to worry about me or to hate me. I feel ashamed.
Forgive my English - sorry for this selfish text.
I'm sure that a lot of people among my fellow students in the university hate me because I achieved something important whereas I didn't deserve this success. This is linked with competition and my loneliness (loners are black sheeps, aren't they?). I can sense this contempt everyday. I'm screwing this year, my moral is constantly low, and I'm lonely, of course.
Today I was told by the worst teacher ever that my dream will certainly be destroyed because I'm so bad in his subject. We hate each other silently. In fact a lot of students hate him and he despises many among us. But I feel surrounded by hatred. Even my former friends don't like me as I didn't go to their binge drinking parties or rarely called back (shyness...).
My success: I was selected like some other people to study abroad next year. That's my dream. But it's threatened by my unability to cope with the current situation and with my fear. I'm lying to my parents as I don't want them to worry about me or to hate me. I feel ashamed.
Forgive my English - sorry for this selfish text.