Hello there. Before I get to the subject I guess I should say something about myself. I'm 17 years old, currently going to highschool.When I was younger, I was never shy, but then came the weight problem, which lasted about 6 years of my life (10 yrs old - 16 yrs old). These years turned me into a very shy, introverted guy(mainly because people were making fun of me). I've lost the weight for quite some time now and although I look different, I'm not different inside.Still the same guy, almost no friends,still fearing of being judged by people around him (even family).
I always feel awkward when I'm alone with people that I haven't known for less than a few years. When I take the bus to school and see someone I know, I try to avoid that person.I'ts nothing personal, just that I know it's going to be an awkward conversation during which I'll have to constantly think of conversation topics, but there's always that really awkward silence (feels like torture).
That was a small dose of my bizarre personality, and now to the subject:
One day I was at school during break and I've noticed that one of the girls in my class had bigger ****s than usual.
That kinda made me like that girl and suddenly, like a spark, I became talkative, funny, interesting the whole day, not just with that girl, but with everyone. No more awkward silences, no more boring me, a different me, a different personality. And this personality kept going for 2 or 3 days, then it disappeared. I was desperate at getting that new, improved version of me back so i thought of ways to do so. Maybe if I was constantly thinking of her or something else. But it didn't work. That me vanished for a week or so, then it appeared again for a day or two, then disappeared and so on and so forth until now it doesn't exist at all. I don't know how to bring it back, but I want to.
So, does anyone know what the hell happened to me? Hormones messing with me? I could use some advice. Thank you
I always feel awkward when I'm alone with people that I haven't known for less than a few years. When I take the bus to school and see someone I know, I try to avoid that person.I'ts nothing personal, just that I know it's going to be an awkward conversation during which I'll have to constantly think of conversation topics, but there's always that really awkward silence (feels like torture).
That was a small dose of my bizarre personality, and now to the subject:
One day I was at school during break and I've noticed that one of the girls in my class had bigger ****s than usual.
That kinda made me like that girl and suddenly, like a spark, I became talkative, funny, interesting the whole day, not just with that girl, but with everyone. No more awkward silences, no more boring me, a different me, a different personality. And this personality kept going for 2 or 3 days, then it disappeared. I was desperate at getting that new, improved version of me back so i thought of ways to do so. Maybe if I was constantly thinking of her or something else. But it didn't work. That me vanished for a week or so, then it appeared again for a day or two, then disappeared and so on and so forth until now it doesn't exist at all. I don't know how to bring it back, but I want to.
So, does anyone know what the hell happened to me? Hormones messing with me? I could use some advice. Thank you