lonewolf
Well-known member
Hey everyone, It's a been a minute... ok... it's been a really long time since I last posted. Shout out to any OGs who remember me lol. Just wanted to say I'm still here... kinda.. but I'm here, and that's something. I first came here in 2008, it seems like a lifetime ago.. things were bad for me.... really bad.. but I found a community here, and then I gelled with a couple members, and we ended up meeting in London... it might have been one of (If not the) first UK meetups. Then life changed for me, I found someone who clicked with me, someone far away and yet I crossed an ocean to be with her, I had to start over, got a job, got promoted, bought a house.. so much change.. but one thing hasn't changed.. one thing that has remained constant. That shadow in my mind, the darkness, my depression. It's a constant war, that the pandemic only made so much worse, and now it's still there, and I'm tired of it .. so .. so tired. I finally caved, I finally allowed myself to want better for myself, to want to be happy in some way, but I know I that can't get there alone. So I'm finally seeking professional help after over 15 years of fighting this, this undiagnosed, untreated, unwelcome part of me. I have a referral in, admittedly I'm losing what's left of my mind wondering when I'll hear back about it... or if I'll even hear back from the therapist I reached out to.. But I've now taken more meaningful steps towards a better tomorrow.