Things Have Become Dull...

cryingcloud · Oct 30, 2012

To make things short, I have a best friend (and only friend) that is too
caught up with her boyfriend (of 4 months) to think about me. I have a mom that never sees daylight because she's always in her room refusing to come out. I have a dad that I despise and two brothers I have no relationship with, as they feel they are "too old for me". (3 and 5 years difference) I'm newly 18 and in my last year of highschool. My days are the same. I wake up for school then come home and go to my room. Then on the weekends, if I'm not working, I am in my room unless I go out to the mall (by myself) just to get out. Life has become very bleak. My family isn't even like a family, because we don't communicate. We're more like roomates. We go our own ways, and I hate it. I beg my mom to do more than just sit in her room, and she's not interested. It's either, "I'm too tired" or "I just got home, or "not now" or "I'll do it later" (and never does) or just something that is an excuse or a flat out "no". She's says that I'm old enough to entertain myself, but I'm not looking for someone to dance for me, I just want to act like a family. Like, why not play some cards, or something? Anything to get her out of her room, for once!! I'm tired too! I'm tired of being rejected by peers, coming in second to my bestfriends boyfriend, being alone, EVERYTHING. People say bad times are tempory, but truth be told, I haven't been legitly happy in over...4 years.

Unwanted94 · Oct 30, 2012

"Bad things are temporary." Yeah, that's a false statement. Some things, you just can't change,and they end up changing you. This is really morose,and I can relate to that feeling. Going to places like the mall, just to get out (alone),and then the distance within the family. It's like, families are supposed to be close, but sadly, not all of them are like that. Just from what I've noticed anyway. If your mom doesn't want to have anything to do with you, then let it be. That's sad that it's even like that anyway, but that's the way life is I guess.

Hearmenow2012 · Oct 31, 2012

If they are not interested in spending time with you then you should just find things that you enjoy doing and show them that you don't need them to have fun and/or be happy. Everyone wants to have a 'normal' family life but sometimes that's not the way that it is. You should just try to distract yourself and/or fill the void whenever you can for as long as you can. I hope that things get better for you.

floatsamjetsam · Oct 31, 2012

Ahh, we have a superpower in common you and I cryingcloud. We can see the future.

I know right now, how my day will go tomorrow, the next, the next and my gaze stretches even weeks, and months down the line. But what a worthless ability, to know tomorrow, today. To know in truth, that today is yesterday's tomorrow and only that.

IgnoredOne · Oct 31, 2012

Well, you can brood about things, or do something to change it.

soresoul · Nov 1, 2012

You pretty much desribe my family cryingcloud. We never did anything either. Both my parents were big alcoholics (my dad quit) but my mom still can be. During the week I go to school, get totured, and come home to video games and tv. On weekends my parents would sit around drinking and we never go out anywhere, unless grocery shopping. I feel isolated all my child and teenage years. I lived in my room with my music. I made some friends down the line and when they disappear when they got g/fs. I tried to ask girls out too but got made fun off or laugh at.

I don't know what I can say to you that can make it all feel better but maybe take up an instrument? I played guitar for awhile. Make yourself proud of something and not wait on people or continue to go to places by yourself and maybe you find someone down the road. Or you can just talk to me too or anyone else on here and we can be your friend.