Trapped

[puddy86]

Hey everybody, first time poster, I am kind of stuck in a situation and I am just looking to see what I should do.

It all started about a year ago, I met this girl (patient) at work who we both had a mutual friend with. We talked whenever I saw her (we clicked pretty well too) and our mutual friend told me that she liked me and thought I was cute, well we were both in relationships so nothing came of it. I have always kept in touch with the mutual friend, but when me and my gf broke up a couple of months ago i saw my mutual friend and the girl that liked me out, she broke up with her bf too. I was just getting over my break up so nothing came of it again, but the mutual friend told me that her friend wanted to go out with me. But the problem is when i asked my mutual friend for her number she said no, I thought it was a little weird but whatever.

Well as the weeks went on, the mutual friend would always talk to me and try to hang out and even said that she loved me. I would never say anything back because that wouldn't be fair to her, plus i have made it pretty clear that I was interested in her friend. Well now the mutual friend is becoming more distant, which is fine, but I am trapped/can't advance with her friend who i really want to talk to. I talk to my crush on social media but i don't have her number and there is really no way in getting it unless i ask on social media (don't want to do that) or see her randomly out one night.

I guess I am just asking for advice on what i should do, i really don't want to ask her out over social media. But the whole situation is weird because the more i distance myself from our mutual friend the less likely chance I see my crush. I know that my crush likes me cause the mutual friend showed me texts between the two of them saying that she thought i was cute. I just feel stuck. sorry for the long and confusing post

 

[VanillaCreme]

I don't understand why this mutual friend would block you from getting to know her friend. Even if she liked you as more than a friend, that's really ****** of her to do. Horrible attitude to have. I would just ask for the phone number on whatever I could. I don't see a big issue with asking on social media, but if you're really uncomfortable with that, then perhaps you should wait until you see her out and about. Sometimes it's worth the wait, and things may happen a little more smoothly if you just wait it out rather than trying to jump the gun.

And again, this mutual friend... I'd probably lose a friend because I'd have a thing or two to say about attitudes like that. **** like that irritates me.

 

[Aisha]

But the problem is when i asked my mutual friend for her number she said no, I thought it was a little weird but whatever.

Well as the weeks went on, the mutual friend would always talk to me and try to hang out and even said that she loved me. I would never say anything back because that wouldn't be fair to her, plus i have made it pretty clear that I was interested in her friend. Well now the mutual friend is becoming more distant, which is fine, but I am trapped/can't advance with her friend who i really want to talk to.

So this mutual friend is interested in you or she thinks she's 'in love' with you? That explains her saying no to giving you the other girl's number. It's probably a good thing if she's becoming more distant then, since you're not interested in her that way.
If you have contact with the girl you're interested in through whatever medium, go for it through that. Ask for her number through facebook chat if that's the only thing available to you right now. Waiting until you see her in person is up to you, but it might better for you if you showed interest in her before she thinks you're just not interested, particularly since you said you're less likely to see her now since your mutual friend is distancing herself.

 

[No_Nickname]

Rather than asking your crush for her number, try giving her yours. Not only is it less presumptuous, but it means she has be the one to text first. If she doesn't text you, then you'll know she isn't interested.

 

[puddy86]

Thanks everybody for the responses. I will probably just have to go through social media which i didn't want to at first but it seems like the best and only way. Especially considering she keeps in contact with me through that. Thanks for the replies i really appreciate it and hopefully everything works out

 

[dd11]

Inviye her out for lunch or coffee on social media and plan a date and time. If she says yes then you can get her number when you meet.