Unattractive

[Lonelyroad]

It's not as if there IS a perfect insight for this topic. Every woman is different, regardless of age, regardless of anything and everything. And I'm fairly certain both her and I and Claudia have all said that the appearance thing can and should be worked on.

However, that said.....and I mean no offense...I really don't understand why men who say these things would take the advice of other men in similar positions as opposed to women who actually interact, flirt with, are attracted to, and have dated all types of men. Fairly certain, all the women posting in this thread have said on this forum that we have dated all types of men. So my question is....do you guys want advice from women who date men or do you just want people agreeing with you so you get some kind of justification or excuse to stop trying and blame someone else for your issues?

I'd much rather take advice from a woman anyday of the week. Even a guy who's a "player" would be low down on my list of people to take advice from about women. Obviously every woman is different but defo taking advice from a woman about what not to do rather than what to do. My problem is that i'm rubbish at reading signs from a woman. I get the sexy stare thing and play it cool thing but beyond that im hopeless with making the first move. My fear of rejection never helps, in fact thats the reason that i've only ever chatted up two women in my whole life and i have a 50% record. My ex is the one that did the chatting me up and if she hadn't had made the first move then i'd never have had my kid and the last 15 years. Whether it was good or bad, i'd never have had the best thing in the world happen to me. So yeah womens advice everytime.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I'd much rather take advice from a woman anyday of the week. Even a guy who's a "player" would be low down on my list of people to take advice from about women. Obviously every woman is different but defo taking advice from a woman about what not to do rather than what to do. My problem is that i'm rubbish at reading signs from a woman. I get the sexy stare thing and play it cool thing but beyond that im hopeless with making the first move. My fear of rejection never helps, in fact thats the reason that i've only ever chatted up two women in my whole life and i have a 50% record. My ex is the one that did the chatting me up and if she hadn't had made the first move then i'd never have had my kid and the last 15 years. Whether it was good or bad, i'd never have had the best thing in the world happen to me. So yeah womens advice everytime.

To be honest, I think everyone is rubbish at reading signs. One girls flirting could be another girls general talking. One girls body language could be another girl flirting. There is no one size fits all on "signs." They may be giving you signs, they may not be. Only one real way to find out, right?

 

[Lonelyroad]

To be honest, I think everyone is rubbish at reading signs. One girls flirting could be another girls general talking. One girls body language could be another girl flirting. There is no one size fits all on "signs." They may be giving you signs, they may not be. Only one real way to find out, right?

I really wish it was that easy for me. Me going upto a woman and making "first contact" petrified me then the rejection bit that I'll know will probably come takes over and I just don't do it. I'm 48 yo and still can't pluck up the courage to actually go up and just talk to a woman. Sadly though that's not just nerves. It's past trauma with over bearing women in my life, since childhood has caused this fear or nervousness or whatever it is, I've had since I was knee high to a grasshopper.

 

[Lonelyroad]

To be honest, I think everyone is rubbish at reading signs. One girls flirting could be another girls general talking. One girls body language could be another girl flirting. There is no one size fits all on "signs." They may be giving you signs, they may not be. Only one real way to find out, right?

It's completely fine online, I can be myself. I'm a very chatty person but and I'd say quite witty and can even be like that with women in my company but as soon as the thought of "chatting anyone up" then I'm fuct! I'm just a contradiction. When you know me then you can't usually shut me up snd I'll defo make u laugh. That's been a gift. My curse is too my empathy.

 

[TheRealCallie]

the rejection bit that I'll know will probably come

This is likely most of your problem. Self prophecy and all that. Women are no different than anyone else. You have no issues at all talking to me, online or not. I'm the same offline as I am on. We (us women) are just humans looking for something in life just like you are. Take a chance and have some confidence. Confidence is a big attraction.

 

[Claudia1794]

Its ghetto af and we have good weed

Good weed...cool cool!! So, have you considered any of the things that were suggested by both ganja supporters and non supporters of the herb?

 

[Lonelyroad]

This is likely most of your problem. Self prophecy and all that. Women are no different than anyone else. You have no issues at all talking to me, online or not. I'm the same offline as I am on. We (us women) are just humans looking for something in life just like you are. Take a chance and have some confidence. Confidence is a big attraction.

This isn't a woman problem, this is a me problem and I've really struggled. Maybe if I'm in a situation that I could make the first move then maybe. It's a crap time to be plagued by anxiety when just about to make a move. Makes me look desperate and I usually am honestly though I understand this has nothing to do with women at all. It's all down to me breaking through that barrier and saying to myself "what's the worst that can happen? She'll say no" it sounds pretty pathetic but it is what it is. Maybe one of these days someone will just make me take the big leap. Could be about fate? Or maybe I should grow some balls!

 

[Claudia1794]

This isn't a woman problem, this is a me problem and I've really struggled. Maybe if I'm in a situation that I could make the first move then maybe. It's a crap time to be plagued by anxiety when just about to make a move. Makes me look desperate and I usually am honestly though I understand this has nothing to do with women at all. It's all down to me breaking through that barrier and saying to myself "what's the worst that can happen? She'll say no" it sounds pretty pathetic but it is what it is. Maybe one of these days someone will just make me take the big leap. Could be about fate? Or maybe I should grow some balls!

That's my go to "grow a pair".... but Im told that is insensitive.

 

[Lonelyroad]

That's my go to "grow a pair".... but Im told that is insensitive.

It's the truth and sometimes it hurts

 

[Rohini]

aybe if I'm in a situation that I could make the first move then maybe. It's a crap time to be plagued by anxiety when just about to make a move. Makes me look desperate and I usually am

You are over-thinking it too much..
Be yourself, be natural..

Worst case scenario - it doesn't go anywhere. Not too bad in the grand scheme of life. At least you made an attempt

 

[Lonelyroad]

You are over-thinking it too much..
Be yourself, be natural..

Worst case scenario - it doesn't go anywhere. Not too bad in the grand scheme of life. At least you made an attempt

Your completely right. I'm a total over thinker. I'm like Dr Strange sitting looking at the 28 million possible outcomes and looking for the one I win and its always bad I'm afraid. The woman clicks before I can say anything hope to god u get the movie reference!! Lol

 

[VanillaCreme]

What about a woman who is so drunk that she cant stand up? Is that ok? Your talking like someone who's never smoked a joint in there life. You do realise that when your stoned on spliff it wont make you a gibbering ***** or make you run about and shoot people or anything like that. Usually the one's who've had a joint are the one's speaking more sense in my experience.

I don't want to be around that either. It wasn't always weed with this person. It was prescription drugs, too. She's deceased now, but I'm not going to pretend like she was a good person in general. She wasn't, certainly not to me. And she was a gibbering ***** without the drugs, so, you could only imagine someone like that being under the influence of something.

I've never smoked weed before, nor been so drunk I couldn't contain myself. I also won't even bother with Tylenol. That being said, I'm not against weed, even though I don't care for it myself. My brother smoked as well, along with the person I'm speaking about because it was his wife. And my brother wasn't a blithering ***** while high. He could communicate just fine.

 

[VanillaCreme]

OP is dead set in his line of thinking, no amount of positivity anyone shares here is going to pull him out of his woe-is-me-I'm the-biggest-loser-in the-world line of thinking bc he doesn't want to change it.

You can tell relatively quickly who is sincerely looking for advice and those who want to wallow away with excuses and misery forever and ever.

Whew, chile. No lie was told with this.

 

[Lonely girl 28]

Your completely right. I'm a total over thinker. I'm like Dr Strange sitting looking at the 28 million possible outcomes and looking for the one I win and its always bad I'm afraid. The woman clicks before I can say anything hope to god u get the movie reference!! Lol

It's like your brain plays the "What if?" game.

 

[SpectraApocalypse]

OP is dead set in his line of thinking, no amount of positivity anyone shares here is going to pull him out of his woe-is-me-I'm the-biggest-loser-in the-world line of thinking bc he doesn't want to change it.

You can tell relatively quickly who is sincerely looking for advice and those who want to wallow away with excuses and misery forever and ever.

Youre right Im not here to ask people for advice with a problem that wont be solved. Im here to vent.

 

[blackdot]

It really just feels like no one will ever wanna be with me. No one I meet is ever interested in me. Im just gonna be alone forever, smoking weed and being mad about it. It really hurts when every woman you speak to ghosts you and gives you the cold shoulder 24/7. Im sure this is an obvious question but does anyone else feel this way? **** love is all I gotta say.

I feel ya. I used to feel that way but finally I got over it cause I realized being undatebale is not something that is curable. Plus once I hit 40, I could have offered women a suitcase filled with $1 million and I still wouldn't have gotten an offer.

 

[Lonelyroad]

Youre right Im not here to ask people for advice with a problem that wont be solved. Im here to vent.

Defo, it's really good to just write out all your frustrations for the day/week/month and just get it out there and if people give advice that's good then bonus but if anything just getting it out there is good advice. Venting us good!

 

[user 188685]

It really just feels like no one will ever wanna be with me. No one I meet is ever interested in me. Im just gonna be alone forever, smoking weed and being mad about it. It really hurts when every woman you speak to ghosts you and gives you the cold shoulder 24/7. Im sure this is an obvious question but does anyone else feel this way? **** love is all I gotta say.

Yes,I feel this way all the time

 

[M_also_lonely]

 

[TropicalStarfish]

What in the living **** are people subjecting themselves too, lol. What a stupid video.

Life is NOT about being some sort of buffed out, alpha, go getter ****, who has the respect of his fellow men and the love of the ladies. If that's true, then cosmo magazine really does portray the ideal every woman should aspire to, lol.

I swear to god, the internet just wants you to punch yourself in the **** and call it good.

Life, that precious thing we have a limited amount of, is varied. You know what other animals in the animal kingdom value status and hierarchy? Dogs and god damn baboons. And dogs are at least quite civil, compared to baboons; and the baboons make humans look bad by comparison.

I am so glad I was born early enough not to be poisoned by all this garbage.

The goal in life isn't to be a ******* ****** bag. It's to explore, learn, create, love, and be amazed.

All this machismo comes from insecurity. There's many tough challenges in life that will require strength; and some are stronger than others. But, I'm fairly certain, strength is quite a relative concept, along with many other things; just like the old saying, 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder.'

It's funny, it used to be women, who were constantly subjected to ultra-unrealistic ideals of feminine beauty. They'd buy all the make-up they were supposed to, find the fashion that was fashionable, read the little articles about how to do this and that for your man.

And now men are doing the same thing. They let other men, tell them what it means to be a man, and try to measure up, this way and that way.

F that.

-actually watched more of the video-
Seems the guy may be somewhat well intentioned towards a specific audience... So, I may have misjudged.

but still.. The reason so many people feel so unfilled in a meaning less and pointless existence, is because the culture that dominates us is ******* horse crap.

I mean by all means, be healthy and successful. But, that's the trick isn't it?