Very odd...

Bishop · Aug 30, 2011

I probably shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth, but I think my loneliness is over...but not because I've found someone. In fact, I'm probably more isolated than ever. The thing is, I've found life to be really gratifying lately.

When I first found my way to this site, I was looking for some sort of explanation for why I had become wholly unconcerned with dating. Mostly, I read others posts to see if I could find this perspective I sought...but to no avail.

I don't really feel like "getting out there" into the dating world again. I'm a 29 year old virgin who has been single for his whole life with the exception of a couple long-distance relationship filled months back in '04; a relationship was something I'd wanted all my life. So, despite not really being that interested in "getting out there," I decided to join a dating site (again) and resolved to put a little effort into this ambivalence-motivated endeavor. But, you know what? I don't think it's happening.

I'm literally one day into the online dating experience and, as I peruse my "matches," I feel nothing. Sure I'll see the pretty ones, I'll read about the "interesting" ones, I'll compare the aspects of our compatibility, and...blah: nothing. There's even a co-worker of mine who flirts with me very obviously and I basically ignore it...

Before all this began, I was burned pretty bad by a female...I don't know, is it possible to be "broken" by a bad situation and feel completely happy? I've even tried to bum myself out...it just doesn't happen. Anyway...thoughts?

Lonesome Crow · Aug 30, 2011

Anything is possible...

I've been burned before by women serveral times. It gets pretty narley

But I'm really obsessed with fucken ****S....
Plus someway or another...I'll eventaully see the positive side of things.
So Im thinking it GODs calling that I should go out into the world to seek N
discover more ****S. Campair the ****S. Bless the ****S. Prey to ****S
Kiss ****S. Sleep with ****S. Bond with ****S......

Dear heavenly father..thank you for the many many blessings you have given
me with ****S< amend.

I guess i lost my fucken sainthood when I lost my virginity. LOrd have mercy upon me.

Ive tried to bum myself out when squeezing ****S...it usually dosnt happen.

Bishop · Aug 30, 2011

...your world view is fascinating to me. Granted, ****s are magical.

Limlim · Aug 30, 2011

I agree, ****s are super awesome.

Lonesome Crow · Aug 30, 2011

The way I look at it is...GOD created ****S.
And GOD Created me. GOD hard wired me to LOVE ****S.

Serously though...Trust had been broken.
Intuitively you know you wanna be loved by a woman.
You want to love and trust again.

Just keep chipping away at it. Dont give up so easily.
I know it's difficult to over come that sometimes..especailly if you had been hurted.
There's really nothing we can do about the past.
Letting go of all the pains and heartaches isnt easy for anyone.
But carrying it into today or tomorrow will hinders us.

You're probably very ,very nice and the world isnt always a nice place.
I wish and hope you find a nice woman that will love you like you needed and want to be love.
Everybody needs and wants love and should be loved.

Maybe try not to see yourself as not broken anymore.
There's nothing wrong with you. You been hurted.
Allow yourself to heal. Time dose heal all wounds...its when we actaully let ourselves heal.
Easier said than done..I know.

Its like a defencsive mechanism we all have inside of us. You been hurted and you pretty much
emotionally shut down or numb out. You keep women at a distance..so you wont get hurted again..

its like when you got burned that one time your brain process it as to never put your hand in the fire again.
Then theres also a built in desire to mate or to love also within you.
I guess allow that desire to grow more...IDK
You dont have to do anything you wish not to do.