What are you thinking right now?

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What I am thinking right now?
I am thinking how to stop this pain,
I am not good enough, I am just here because I am the easiest option. I'm tired
 
So, before I changed the channel, there was a soap opera. Now, growing up, I was subject to many a show of this caliber. Today, the doctor and the detective were talking about how this character faked their death with a bear mauling. How in the **** did that become a story line? I mean, c'mon. How would that be possible? I almost wanted to find out how the story arc panned out. But on this site I've seen even less plausible stories. Usually the ones involving relationships. Ok, basically all. But a bear mauling.
 
I hate paywalls.

I was just browsing something today and saw what looked like an article on just the kind of topic I'm looking for (self-knowledge), but I scrolled down a little and sure enough the article cuts off and you just see some ******** about a half-off subscription. It's not something Adblock Plus can take care of either, they've gotten more sophisticated.

Man. It's like, I know these websites/magazines are businesses and all, but at the same time....**** that ****. I hate it!
 
What am I thinking right now? How can I control my feelings, I felt anxious from time to time... and the event that happened a month ago, is creeping on me. I hate the feeling of it, the person who was my safe place was the one who hurt me, and the pain is unbearable, I still cry and i am going back to the same question. Why me? why it's always to be me? I always give my whole heart to people I care about, and yet they justbreak it. like it's nothing... becoming numb is my option and not to care so much is the only way. I wanted to see a therapist cause its affecting me daily , but i am not sure if I am ready to see anyone and to open up.
 
I wish I could stop at eating just half a pizza. But, I can't. I have to eat the entire thing. Then I feel like crap the rest of the day / night.
I eat half. My strength comes from knowing the other half will be my cold pizza breakfast. You have to lock on to that motivation and reap its rewards.
 
I'ma need you to go on ahead and do me a favor... Just remove that expiration date on that salt.
 
I want to be a weather shaman...or meteorologist..not really, but the pay for being so very wrong and getting to still work, and yes, paid
 
That that many people would intentionally hide....yet, still be I guess, present. I don't think, after the dozens of times I parrot this trite ****, I will ever get an any answer. It just bothers me way more than it probably should.
 

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