Why Are You Lonely?

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Nolife Princess said:
Simple Answer-MARRIED! if you don't want to live your life lonely then DO NOT GET MARRIED! I was less lonely in my single life than I have even been in my married.......... they call it a marriage, but it is more like a funeral....... the day you say 'I do' is the day you die to your life.

How long have you been married?
 
Okiedokes said:
Nolife Princess said:
Simple Answer-MARRIED! if you don't want to live your life lonely then DO NOT GET MARRIED! I was less lonely in my single life than I have even been in my married.......... they call it a marriage, but it is more like a funeral....... the day you say 'I do' is the day you die to your life.

How long have you been married?

Tooooo looong! I soooo do need a life. )):

 
Call me crazy, but I honestly don't see how marriage could ever be boring.

The day I think my theoretical marriage is getting stale is the day that I go out, buy a thick steak and some vegetables, a huge bunch of flowers, some chocolates and an awesome DVD.

Then I come home, cook an absolutely mouth-watering meal, watch the incredible film with the love of my life and then proceed to have an entire evening of ridiculously epic snogging and love making.

Boom, marriage is no longer dull and is instead absolutely wintastic.

(Note: above views may be unrealistic and the inaccurate daydreams of a rabid 20 year old male :D )
 
That only works for so long though. Marriage can be the most difficult job you will ever undertake or it could be the easiest ride of your life, everyone is different, just keep in mind that no matter how much you try if the other person doesn’t respond then you’re fighting a loosing battle.
 
Equinox said:
And also because people usually don't see me or hear me. Occasionally I wonder if I'm a ghost, not really able to control when I'm visible and not.


Lol, I have the same problem. :(
 
Nolife Princess said:
Simple Answer-MARRIED! if you don't want to live your life lonely then DO NOT GET MARRIED! I was less lonely in my single life than I have even been in my married.......... they call it a marriage, but it is more like a funeral....... the day you say 'I do' is the day you die to your life.

Um...ever think of getting a divorce then. Obviously marriage isn't for you and you said you were less lonely in your single life. If you were less lonely you must have been much happier then too. Doesn't sound like you are now.
 
Why am I lonely?

It's simple. I'm lonely because of the person I am, I was somehow born to be a person that doesn't have a simple life. And born to be a person who just isn't liked by everyone, who is different, and who can't seem to make friends.

That's my answer.
 
Before I start I must say sorry for my terribly english. I am not from english-speaking country (I am from Eastern Europe - Czech republic) and my ability learn foreign leanguage is... very bad. But that´s enough...

I am lonely... not everyday and I am not alone. I have parents (theyre divorced but that´s not important i have good relationship with both of them... usual or normal relationship if ... even if I dont know "what normal is"... thats make no sense... I must try start once again and better :) )...
... I am not super-intelligent or traumatized man (yes - my childhood wasnt ideal - due divorce of my parents and "violently" aftermath - but it was still in "normality")... also I am not "special". I am not good sportsman or woman-hunter, I am not fat, or alcoholic. I am not blind or... I AM NORMAL - ABSOLUTELY AVERAGE YOUNG MAN... phew... finally... maybe I have problem with expression (and my terribly english worsens it)...

... iam not sure why I am lonely, why when I am i the centre of discussion I feel loneliness, I dont know why... that´s something what i think for a big problem... I just I dont know. Sometime when people around me (friends, family members... or just people linked to me) talking I listen only: "Blahblahblah..." I think that Iam just too proud man to listen somebody other. I rather talking than listening and I cant control that... I am just depend on talking because... when I am talking (about anyting - usually about history or politics because its my hobby) i feel something like... orgasm... bad word... not... I am just excited when I speaking and speaking and this is my biggest problem, because I want persuade - everytime - other people about MY RIGHT (truth)... Its absolutely useless, I know... but I must - just I cant be quiet - tell my opinion about everything to everybody around me. I must speak, speak and speak and I cant stop... and I dont know why... why for god sake i doing that? Its something like *** (bad word... its not correct) for me when I talking. And I am not able listening to other people... only what i listen when then say is "blahblahblah...".

I am desperated from that... Am I soo proud? So egocentric maniac what must tell his (my) own opinion for everything to everybody around him (me)? Maybe... not maybe... sure I am "crazy"... why I must... just must... i cant control that - i promise - speak about for example Second World War during party in the pub? Why iam so ********? Its like exhibicionism... and I am not sure, that same cause (exhibicionism) dont lead me on that place (A lonely life website) because its for me just occassion to speak (write) and speak (write)... I want be quiet... but something in me want be noisy, noiser... and that is reason for my loneliness...

... people dont like me, because I am just boring, I speak about "serious things" (poticis, history, philosophy...) because something in me want it... I want persuade everybody in this planet about my own rights about my own themes.... And I hated it.... I cant control it and this is reason why people dont like me. I am losing potentionally friends and in all collectives when I was (on school, academy, high school) I was outsider... weak (body) and noisy... not smart... I am smart - I know it (or its my pride?) - but other people saw in my only freaking maggot who has no muscles (I dont like sport... I am not fat, but... my body is not athletic and I am weak (in power)) and everyday talking about "serious things"... yes they beated me many times (in school) I was typical nerd (for them), grind (but in paradox I was not excellent student because only things which I can do is connected with social studies like history, philosophy etc...) and i was (of course) bullied by them. Ostrakized and beated everyday (before and after school)... like shadow I searched safe way to home and someday i was succesfull and another day not... but its not important for today, i am not traumatized by this... I suffered because I am *****... my social behaviour is absolutely bad, I cant listen to another people and if you meet me in real life you´ll hate me because I am not "good person" in behaviour...

...at the end... I once again say sorry for my english. I like that leanguage, but i know how terrible (for me) is... so sorry and bye...
 
Well am not lonely that much but now and again i get that feeling. Like just being able to cuddle up on the sofa with someone and watch a film. Its a simple feeling but feels nice. I would like that
 
I'm so shy I don't know how to talk to people, dealing with customers everyday turns my face to a tomato.. how about trying to make a friend or just random chats.. i'd be a human rainbow :(

maybe having no friends is a good thing.. :(
 
Just had the wrong outlook on life for much too long that it's stuck. So much I'd like to say to people, but when it comes time to say it, the mind goes blank. As a result I come off as awkward, rude and abrasive (which is never my intention).
 
im a self sabotoger...only reason i havent ended my worthless life ...its cause its selfish to do so
 
jjam said:
For me, it's probably a fear of rejection or a fear of finding something worse - a situation that's so wrong, I'd have to walk away hurt and fighting to get rid of the thoughts.

I don't know if I'll ever overcome it. Some nights at my computer I'll say that I'm going to do things differently. I'm going to pick up on when I'm getting along nicely with some random person, whether it be at a store or wherever, and just go for it. But I never do. I can have a zillion friendly exchanges with people, and then I'll never see them again. I can have a zillion friendly exchanges with people I'll see multiple times, but phone numbers never get exchanged. Expression of interest beyond the small talk is never made known.

So, the question is what are you doing to change things? If you are not would you consider this thought. Check out finding some activities that you might enjoy where you would have a common bond. Getting involved in a sport, joining a club or taking lessons such as art would put you in contact with others who share your interests and could lead to exchanges with the activity being the core. Bottom line is nothing will change until you make it happen. Good luck
Jerry
 
kamya said:
It's actually not selfish to do so. But keep thinking that if it's what is going to keep you alive :O

it really is...even though depression is a disease i would say....how many people dont wish that they wernt dying or others wishing that there loves one were alive...thats the only reason i dont
 
Someone (a former friend) has explained to me why I am lonely while attempting to verbally tear me down. The reasons are:
*I am apparently pretentious and stuck-up.
*I share very few or no common interests with anyone and I do nothing to try to change that.
*I wait for people to come to me rather than going to them.
While the first may or may not be true (I don't feel pretentious), the second and third are absolutely true. Furthermore I have failed at most of my endeavors, and in the process the few friendships and relationships that I have had have crumbled, and I have had to leave the city on account of my not being able to afford it any longer and moved back to my home town, which is very small and has very little opportunity to meet new people. Maybe all of this will change at some point but at the moment I'm more lonely than I have ever been.
 
I was answer the question when I read what Paulo wrote. And I realized I couldn't describe in better way why i feel alone. I was hurt so many times that I have created a defense that constantly makes me keep away from people. sometimes I think that loneliness is the price I have to pay for not wanting to beeing hurt.

the first can be like others see you and not what you are. Shyness is often mistaken for arrogance. unfortunately
 
Lady in Black said:
I was answer the question when I read what Paulo wrote. And I realized I couldn't describe in better way why i feel alone. I was hurt so many times that I have created a defense that constantly makes me keep away from people. sometimes I think that loneliness is the price I have to pay for not wanting to beeing hurt.

the first can be like others see you and not what you are. Shyness is often mistaken for arrogance. unfortunately




Well put Lady in Black. I would have to add feeling disappointment to being hurt as well.
 

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