Women less forgiving towards unattractive men.

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
Status
Not open for further replies.
Let's see you

No thanks, heh. I'm not posting my ugly mug on a public forum for a multitude of reasons. Suffice to say, it's a rather bad idea and even on the off chance it was okay, I fear nothing good would come of it.

Bitterness isn't a very productive state though, so one shouldn't dwell too much on it. Think about other areas of life where appearance means nothing. Music doesn't care how you look. Neither does a lot of careers and hobbies.

No, I agree. Bitterness isn't productive, but when it comes to looks there's little to be done. I try not to think about it most days, but even so. I subconsciously avoid mirrors and photos nowadays. When I'm thinking about relationships though, it's all I can think about. Other things, well, doesn't exactly matter.
 
Do some of you guys even read the articles (and their sources) before commenting on the topics?
It specifically states that women think the "unattractive" men are fine until they 'transgress a social norm'. The study apparently only confirms that women will give the "attractive" men a little more room to push those boundaries. And that does make sense if you think about it. I'm sure all of you do it, too. Don't you?
How many of you would be willing to date someone without a job, or someone who still lives at home with their parents in adulthood, if they were attractive as opposed to someone you thought was unattractive? Would you even date someone you thought was unattractive? Don't lie. :p I think it is very well known that attractive people can get away with stuff like that more often with more people. And maybe that's not what some of you want to hear but it's the truth and I don't see any value in denying reality.

It's not saying that "unattractive" people don't get any chance. In fact it says they do. It didn't say that confidence or humor doesn't change anything either. All it says is people this study defined as "attractive" are more likely to get away with things than someone the study defined as "unattractive", on average. That's it. And that's probably common sense if you think about it.

Confidence and having a good sense of humor still helps a lot. It really does. And I'm sure if you guys looked there are probably some studies proving this as well.

Don't try to read what isn't there!
 
Good point.

Thanks for clarifying, Despicable Me.
 
Despicable Me said:
How many of you would be willing to date someone without a job, or someone who still lives at home with their parents in adulthood, if they were attractive as opposed to someone you thought was unattractive?

I would be willing to date a girl who didn't have a job or who still lived at home as an adult because I've been there myself and I don't hold it against people. Besides, if I was making enough money, I wouldn't really mind though I would definitely encourage the person to go to school of some kind. If I'm not making a lot of money, then it would be mathematically impossible to pay someone else's bills when I can't really pay my own. I still might date the person though, but I'd encourage them to get some kind of training. My answer would be the same whether they were attractive or not.

Despicable Me said:
Would you even date someone you thought was unattractive? Don't lie. :p

I might have to, if it's between someone I thought was unattractive and being single for life.




I just try to stay positive and believe that I will date someone someday, because I've been negative and I didn't like where it got me. I can't stand living in the grips of despair. I try not to be bitter even though it's hard sometimes, I try to tell myself that someday I will figure it out if I keep trying and putting forth an honest effort. I've got to have some kind of hope to keep me going forward.
 
TheSkaFish said:
I would be willing to date a girl who didn't have a job or who still lived at home as an adult because I've been there myself and I don't hold it against people.

I think this question was aimed to women.

TheSkaFish said:
I might have to, if it's between someone I thought was unattractive and being single for life.

That's what the *******s want.
 
Despicable Me said:
How many of you would be willing to date someone without a job, or someone who still lives at home with their parents in adulthood, if they were attractive as opposed to someone you thought was unattractive?

Depends on the circumstances on the job front. If they were looking for a job, that would be one thing, but if they are just living with their parents because they are lazy and don't feel they shouldn't have to work because mommy and daddy will take care of him, that's quite another.

As for living with parents, I don't see a huge problem with that.

I don't give a **** what you look like, so my answer is the same for "attractive" and "unattractive" people.



Despicable Me said:
Would you even date someone you thought was unattractive? Don't lie. :p

I have and I would again.
 
ThatZealousOne said:
Let's see you

No thanks, heh. I'm not posting my ugly mug on a public forum for a multitude of reasons. Suffice to say, it's a rather bad idea and even on the off chance it was okay, I fear nothing good would come of it.

You know what? That's exactly how I feel and it's why I would never post mine in the Let's see the faces! thread.

There are a few people here on this forum that I sent my photo to in the past and they all reported back to me their monitor began acting funny as soon as they viewed it. They threatened to send me the bill for a new one.

True story.

TheRealCallie said:
I don't give a **** what you look like, so my answer is the same for "attractive" and "unattractive" people.


That's because you have class.
 
BeyondShy said:
Xpendable said:
TheRealCallie said:
I have and I would again.

That sounds like giving up.


Um....HOW??

You don't have to look for a super model, but at least date someone you consider somewhat attractive; it's the bare minimum. Now, if it just that she recognizes that her man is (was) not physically attractive but she likes him for other qualities, that's another story. Nevertheless, it shows that she still has a notion of what she considers physically attractive no know that what she picked didn't fall on that category.


TheRealCallie said:
Oh yes, I totally gave up on my almost 10 year ******* marriage. :rolleyes:
Point missed again. Giving up on your standards I meant, not on working the relationship.
 
Xpendable said:
TheRealCallie said:
Oh yes, I totally gave up on my almost 10 year ******* marriage. :rolleyes:
Point missed again. Giving up on your standards I meant, not on working the relationship.

I gave up on nothing. Some of the guys I have been with would be considered "unattractive" by a lot of people. MY definition of attractiveness often has next to nothing to do with looks. I choose who I date by who a person is, not by what they ******* look like. Attraction to someone can come later, as it did with my ex, as it didn't with a few others (hence why we broke up). But, you know nothing about how and why I first started going out with my ex, so don't try to understand it, because you won't.
 
Xpendable said:
You don't have to look for a super model, but at least date someone you consider somewhat attractive; it's the bare minimum. Now, if it just that she recognizes that her man is (was) not physically attractive but she likes him for other qualities, that's another story. Nevertheless, it shows that she still has a notion of what she considers physically attractive no know that what she picked didn't fall on that category.

You really assume a lot about her, don't you?
 
BeyondShy said:
Xpendable said:
You don't have to look for a super model, but at least date someone you consider somewhat attractive; it's the bare minimum. Now, if it just that she recognizes that her man is (was) not physically attractive but she likes him for other qualities, that's another story. Nevertheless, it shows that she still has a notion of what she considers physically attractive no know that what she picked didn't fall on that category.

You really assume a lot about her, don't you?

That's an assumption.


TheRealCallie said:
I gave up on nothing. Some of the guys I have been with would be considered "unattractive" by a lot of people.

Are those people right?

TheRealCallie said:
MY definition of attractiveness often has next to nothing to do with looks.

If you work a personal definition then there's no too much to take from it that can be applied to others.

TheRealCallie said:
I choose who I date by who a person is, not by what they ******* look like.

Do you have both options?

TheRealCallie said:
But, you know nothing about how and why I first started going out with my ex, so don't try to understand it, because you won't.

I understand you have your own ways, the "why" is irrelevant.
 
Xpendable said:
That's an assumption.


You know what? I'm going to quit right now because it's useless talking to you. I don't know why you do this but I am not going to get dragged down in this. Enjoy debating with yourself. Maybe if you do that you'll have a chance of coming out on top for once.
 
BeyondShy said:
Xpendable said:
That's an assumption.


You know what? I'm going to quit right now because it's useless talking to you. I don't know why you do this but I am not going to get dragged down in this. Enjoy debating with yourself. Maybe if you do that you'll have a chance of coming out on top for once.

This is mostly for other users:
I'll tell you why I do "this". I made a comment in which I made suppositions (that later were confirmed by Callie), but before that, you read it, you saw what it says and instead of elaborating some answer, a point or a contrasting opinion, you just used a reactionary tactic. You didn't adressed anything from my comment. Instead you made the effort to make it look like I was being unfair and purposely malicious. You deviated the topic so be able to attack what it wrote based on my intetions instead of the content of my comment. That's why I did that; therefore the cynicism.
 
Xpendable said:
TheRealCallie said:
I gave up on nothing. Some of the guys I have been with would be considered "unattractive" by a lot of people.

Are those people right?

I was told many times by many different people that he was unattractive. Aside from the fact that I didn't find him attractive when I first met him, I became attracted to him later and I'm still attracted to him.

But as I said, you know nothing of the circumstances of how I first started dating him or why we broke up, so yeah, stop making assumptions.

I will tell you this though....I chose him (short and "unattractive") over a tall, "attractive" guy. So let's hear whatever ******** you have to tell me about why I did that. :rolleyes:
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Latest posts

Back
Top