I am considering contacting the ethics line when I return to work in December

[user 176211]

I am currently out of work due to my mother having a stroke and having no one to take care of her outside of myself and my father.

If this isn't soul crushing enough, I am also going through a professional rut. I do not have a job. I have a career and I train in the corporate sector for a living. I fell in love with my job because I like to teach people, but I do not have the desire or time, no money to go back to school. In either case, I make a LOT more than professional teachers anyway. Like I said, I love what I do, love meeting new people, love mentoring, love leading, and this profession has taken me out of a shell that personally took me a long time in life to find my way out of.

THE ISSUE
Since I went to my job and learned about the Trainer Career Track, that is ALL I have pursued aggressively. It helped me build my brand and become a well-respect subject matter expert. It is my identity and what people know me for, professionally speaking. Our training team never had a formal manager. I saw that as an opportunity for myself since my job is constantly harping on the typical key phrases they latch onto- such as ¨disrupt¨ or ¨think outside the box¨. For the LAST THREE YEARS, I have been going to my supervisor, and HER supervisor telling them many ideas I have for making the training team independent.
The feedback I get is the following:
- ¨To manage a training team, you just also have anywhere from 12-15 agents reporting to you as well" (AKA I would have to manage the training team, and also be a full time manager for agents... AKA do TWO jobs for the price of one¨
-*In response to me requesting a team designer* ¨We don´t have that in our budget¨
-*In response for a 4th trainer to the 3-trainer team that is supporting OVER 100 people in the dept* ¨We don´t have that in our budget¨
-This department just doesn´t have the need for a training manager.
*MY REBUTTAL: ¨Except I have been personally managing the team myself, and leading it with nearly non-existent resources¨.
*THEIR REBUTTAL: ¨This department will just never have the need for a training manager.

SUDDENLY, my manager (Who is a manager of agents) suddenly gets her team of agents taken away. And she is put in the position to manage the training team.

This makes me feel violated, which was laughed at when I expressed it. I am a man, so apparently that´s funny. I want to see who´s laughing when I get the ethics department involved in December. But I feel violated just the same- going to my monthly development meetings with my manager and telling her all of my ideas, she shoots them down, and then gets put into the position that I was told will never exists, over me, who has been doing the non existed job for over 3 years. And she did it using the SAME ideas I´d express in our private meetings.

This whole experience has just reinforced my distrust for white people. I feel violated when they smile at me or be friendly. It automatically feels disingenuous and i dont trust them. Their word doesn´t mean much at all, and all they are ever interested in doing is stealing the hard work of others. I look forward to ruining my managers day.

 

[Efbee]

I am currently out of work due to my mother having a stroke and having no one to take care of her outside of myself and my father.

If this isn't soul crushing enough, I am also going through a professional rut. I do not have a job. I have a career and I train in the corporate sector for a living. I fell in love with my job because I like to teach people, but I do not have the desire or time, no money to go back to school. In either case, I make a LOT more than professional teachers anyway. Like I said, I love what I do, love meeting new people, love mentoring, love leading, and this profession has taken me out of a shell that personally took me a long time in life to find my way out of.

THE ISSUE
Since I went to my job and learned about the Trainer Career Track, that is ALL I have pursued aggressively. It helped me build my brand and become a well-respect subject matter expert. It is my identity and what people know me for, professionally speaking. Our training team never had a formal manager. I saw that as an opportunity for myself since my job is constantly harping on the typical key phrases they latch onto- such as ¨disrupt¨ or ¨think outside the box¨. For the LAST THREE YEARS, I have been going to my supervisor, and HER supervisor telling them many ideas I have for making the training team independent.
The feedback I get is the following:
- ¨To manage a training team, you just also have anywhere from 12-15 agents reporting to you as well" (AKA I would have to manage the training team, and also be a full time manager for agents... AKA do TWO jobs for the price of one¨
-*In response to me requesting a team designer* ¨We don´t have that in our budget¨
-*In response for a 4th trainer to the 3-trainer team that is supporting OVER 100 people in the dept* ¨We don´t have that in our budget¨
-This department just doesn´t have the need for a training manager.
*MY REBUTTAL: ¨Except I have been personally managing the team myself, and leading it with nearly non-existent resources¨.
*THEIR REBUTTAL: ¨This department will just never have the need for a training manager.

SUDDENLY, my manager (Who is a manager of agents) suddenly gets her team of agents taken away. And she is put in the position to manage the training team.

This makes me feel violated, which was laughed at when I expressed it. I am a man, so apparently that´s funny. I want to see who´s laughing when I get the ethics department involved in December. But I feel violated just the same- going to my monthly development meetings with my manager and telling her all of my ideas, she shoots them down, and then gets put into the position that I was told will never exists, over me, who has been doing the non existed job for over 3 years. And she did it using the SAME ideas I´d express in our private meetings.

This whole experience has just reinforced my distrust for white people. I feel violated when they smile at me or be friendly. It automatically feels disingenuous and i dont trust them. Their word doesn´t mean much at all, and all they are ever interested in doing is stealing the hard work of others. I look forward to ruining my managers day.

Unfortunately, there are thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of similar stories around the world. You are not the first to whom it's happened and surely not the last.
And FYI, that shanigan has been used by more then just white people. Backstabers liars and thieves come in all colors.
I do hope you'll get satisfaction from the Ethics Department and it would be nice to let us know how it turns out.
Peace.

 

[user 176211]

Unfortunately, there are thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of similar stories around the world. You are not the first to whom it's happened and surely not the last.
And FYI, that shanigan has been used by more then just white people. Backstabers liars and thieves come in all colors.
I do hope you'll get satisfaction from the Ethics Department and it would be nice to let us know how it turns out.
Peace.

Oh, I agree with you 100%. Thieves, backstabbers, and liars come in all colors. But my entire life experiences have just been getting taken advantage of by white people. I wasn't arguing the contrary. Just sharing my personal experiences. Its to the point where I feel uncomfortable when white people are nice or ¨professional¨ towards me. It makes me feel like someone is looking at me through a mask, but I can´t see their real face.

And yes, going to the Ethics Dept will bring me GREAT satisfaction. I have come to realize in life that when people are vipers in the grass, they are too used to not being called out and having a spotlight put on them. My job, like so many other jobs across the country love to devour all of these silly little platitudes about ¨Diversity and Inclusion¨. But the only diversity that I have seen on my team in the last 6 years is a diverse array of white women. That within itself wouldnt even really be a problem to me. Except that of those 6 years, for 3 of them I was doing a job that ¨didn't exist¨ (as long as it was me who wanted the position- if anything so that I can actually get the title and pay for what I was already doing).

Suddenly I was told that in order to do the job I worked towards, I also needed to manage another team as well. So why is it that I have to do TWO jobs to achieve my goal/dream job, but this woman comes out of left field and only needs to do the one job. Yes, I would LOVE to see what the ethics folks have to say about that. Id love for them to weigh in.

 

[Efbee]

Oh, I agree with you 100%. Thieves, backstabbers, and liars come in all colors. But my entire life experiences have just been getting taken advantage of by white people. I wasn't arguing the contrary. Just sharing my personal experiences. Its to the point where I feel uncomfortable when white people are nice or ¨professional¨ towards me. It makes me feel like someone is looking at me through a mask, but I can´t see their real face.

And yes, going to the Ethics Dept will bring me GREAT satisfaction. I have come to realize in life that when people are vipers in the grass, they are too used to not being called out and having a spotlight put on them. My job, like so many other jobs across the country love to devour all of these silly little platitudes about ¨Diversity and Inclusion¨. But the only diversity that I have seen on my team in the last 6 years is a diverse array of white women. That within itself wouldnt even really be a problem to me. Except that of those 6 years, for 3 of them I was doing a job that ¨didn't exist¨ (as long as it was me who wanted the position- if anything so that I can actually get the title and pay for what I was already doing).

Suddenly I was told that in order to do the job I worked towards, I also needed to manage another team as well. So why is it that I have to do TWO jobs to achieve my goal/dream job, but this woman comes out of left field and only needs to do the one job. Yes, I would LOVE to see what the ethics folks have to say about that. Id love for them to weigh in.

Because it's a woman and women have been disadvantaged for so long ( since the time of Moses I think they said ) that now they have to redress the situation 180° to where men now have to get the shaft to bring the Patriarchy down and create a Utopia where women rule and men are subservient... that's the modernist line anyway.
Personally, I think it's all garbage but we men don't get a say because we're all potential rapists and toxic. Either we submit or... or we submit, those are the choices.

 

[user 176211]

Because it's a woman and women have been disadvantaged for so long ( since the time of Moses I think they said ) than now they have to redress the situation 180° to where men now have to get the shaft to bring the Patriarchy down and create a Utopia where women rule and men are subservient... that's the modernist line anyway.
Personally, I think it's all garbage but we men don't get a say because we're all potential rapists and toxic. Either we submit or... or we submit, those are the choices.

I agree with this as well! I find it laughable that when I told management that I felt violated after having my own manager lie to me, then implement ideas that I came up with. This is one of those double standards that when women use the word ¨violate¨, suddenly the world shuts down and it becomes a federal case- but when a man feels that way, its a joke.

And you hit the nail on the head with the word ¨patriarchy¨. A million and one times a day, things to be considered ¨sexist¨ happens to men and no one bats an eyelash. I have been sexually harassed, verbally and physically, more times than I can count.

I remember once at a meeting, when we were discussing who would have off during the holidays (so that we do not take off from work on the same day). And the women raised the objection that ¨I should not have a vote because I do not have any kids or family¨. Which is completely wrong. I remember thinking how much that would have been an issue if I had said that to a woman.

 

[Sir Joseph]

Waldo, I understand your frustration, since I completed a Federal government career where minorities, women, and gays were given obvious preferential hiring and promotion opportunities. My last agency also favored Mormons for some reason. In any case, I received my share of being screwed over during my career and always had a similar choice of whether to fight or not.

It's not an easy or simple answer. I had a co-worker friend who filed and won multiple EEO grievances over the years, and a final Federal lawsuit win finally taught management to leave him alone. I've known other coworkers follow the same path, and with much trouble, receive justice in the end - but not without a lot of stress and fatigue, and not necessarily to a happy ending. You see, it's not a pleasant environment to work with people after engaging in legal battles with them.

Only you can decide if the battle's worth the fight. Winning the position though may not be winning the war if it yields a hostile work environment. I've come to learn after having 3 careers with 4 agencies in 7 offices, that moving on to where you're recognized, respected, and appreciated for your work and character is a better path than maintaining roots in a bad place. In my case, I also learned that the Lord was guiding my path when I went through tough career times. Things got so bad I demoted twice to change careers, and in the end realized an opportunity that became the joy of my life. I'm so thankful now that I got screwed over, was forced out of a career that I too was outstanding in, and discovered a new, far better path. In the end, the rough road was a blessing in disguise.

Consider carefully, and pray for God's guidance. You're not in control.

 

[user 176211]

Waldo, I understand your frustration, since I completed a Federal government career where minorities, women, and gays were given obvious preferential hiring and promotion opportunities. My last agency also favored Mormons for some reason. In any case, I received my share of being screwed over during my career and always had a similar choice of whether to fight or not.

It's not an easy or simple answer. I had a co-worker friend who filed and won multiple EEO grievances over the years, and a final Federal lawsuit win finally taught management to leave him alone. I've known other coworkers follow the same path, and with much trouble, receive justice in the end - but not without a lot of stress and fatigue, and not necessarily to a happy ending. You see, it's not a pleasant environment to work with people after engaging in legal battles with them.

Only you can decide if the battle's worth the fight. Winning the position though may not be winning the war if it yields a hostile work environment. I've come to learn after having 3 careers with 4 agencies in 7 offices, that moving on to where you're recognized, respected, and appreciated for your work and character is a better path than maintaining roots in a bad place. In my case, I also learned that the Lord was guiding my path when I went through tough career times. Things got so bad I demoted twice to change careers, and in the end realized an opportunity that became the joy of my life. I'm so thankful now that I got screwed over, was forced out of a career that I too was outstanding in, and discovered a new, far better path. In the end, the rough road was a blessing in disguise.

Consider carefully, and pray for God's guidance. You're not in control.

Thank you very much for these words. It makes me feel better to commiserate with someone from that world. In this case, I dont believe there is a recourse to win the position away from that person. My only goal is to shine a spotlight on this because a complete lack of shame is nothing more than a different form of blissful ignorance. Malicious people use that blissful ignorance to live carefree and with a complete lack of conscious, therefore continuing to leave used and broken people in their wake while taking advantage every second.

I was a great worker for 6 years, day in and day out, waking up at the early ass crack of dawn like any other hard working person to build a future for myself to do something significant for the little bit of family that I have left. And if there is something better in the future for me because of this, I cant see it yet, so I just kinda have to sit with this feeling of violation. But your words are very encouraging and I completely understand where you are coming from.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

I hope you can let go of your anger; I find it a vile poison that steals one's life away, second, by agonizing second.

As for my opinion on the matter, I can't for the life of me understand why this behavior would NOT be expected in the corporate world. Those people are barely human, whatever color their skin is, whatever their cultural background and disposition. The ones in that world that do have a sense of humanity, I imagine, all find themselves in similar positions to you, eventually.

I don't think it's ever too late to go back to school, and where community college is concerned, I'm pretty sure there all kinds of free grants available. It can _possibly_ be not only a new opportunity to start over in something new; but, also meet new people.

But, I do hope you can drop your anger, as soon as possible. It robs you of the beauty and splendor of life.