Hi there .
I really need to share this, I hope you can help me. I'll share my story of the last 3 years, so this'll probably be a long post. In 2017, I was working in a musical instrument store, and by that year I had given up on finding someone. I tried dating apps, tried asking some girls out, but I mostly had bad luck. Also, I was still a virgin (I was 25 at the time).
I had decided to close my heart, give up on relationships and start investing in myself. Then I met the then new cashier; I didn't actually feel attracted to her, maybe because I was stone cold. However, up until that time in my life, not a single girl came up to me, I swear. Then, she called me up on WhatsApp, asking if I'd go out with her. I was stoked.
I accepted a kiss, then we started meeting, making out... then eventually, we had sex. It was my first time, I was nervous, but it went out fine. Here's the thing, she was (and still is) my first relationship, ever. But I wasn't her first, and she already has a child (12 year old, today). That's not the problem, though.
Now here's the thing, I think I'm too much of a goodie two shoes, I can't say no to somethings and every time we had an argument and almost broke up, I felt bad for her, since she was living with her very dysfunctional family. Fast-forward to today, and I ended up renting a house with her, just a block away from where I was living (I lived with my mom, brother and grandparents, and I love them so much). Now regarding the thread's title:
I'm not happy for myself. I'm glad I took her out of her parents' house, to a better neighborhood, but that's it. I keep thinking that I never wanted this, I was just fine before meeting her, but now it's all gone. I've sacrificed a lot for her, cleared most of her debts, paid for her driver's license, her professional education (makeup courses). That involved spending all the money I had saved, and selling the guitar that I had customized.
Now I miss my guitar, I miss my peaceful life. In short, I'm not happy, and I keep wishing that I could go back.
Please, help me.
I really need to share this, I hope you can help me. I'll share my story of the last 3 years, so this'll probably be a long post. In 2017, I was working in a musical instrument store, and by that year I had given up on finding someone. I tried dating apps, tried asking some girls out, but I mostly had bad luck. Also, I was still a virgin (I was 25 at the time).
I had decided to close my heart, give up on relationships and start investing in myself. Then I met the then new cashier; I didn't actually feel attracted to her, maybe because I was stone cold. However, up until that time in my life, not a single girl came up to me, I swear. Then, she called me up on WhatsApp, asking if I'd go out with her. I was stoked.
I accepted a kiss, then we started meeting, making out... then eventually, we had sex. It was my first time, I was nervous, but it went out fine. Here's the thing, she was (and still is) my first relationship, ever. But I wasn't her first, and she already has a child (12 year old, today). That's not the problem, though.
Now here's the thing, I think I'm too much of a goodie two shoes, I can't say no to somethings and every time we had an argument and almost broke up, I felt bad for her, since she was living with her very dysfunctional family. Fast-forward to today, and I ended up renting a house with her, just a block away from where I was living (I lived with my mom, brother and grandparents, and I love them so much). Now regarding the thread's title:
I'm not happy for myself. I'm glad I took her out of her parents' house, to a better neighborhood, but that's it. I keep thinking that I never wanted this, I was just fine before meeting her, but now it's all gone. I've sacrificed a lot for her, cleared most of her debts, paid for her driver's license, her professional education (makeup courses). That involved spending all the money I had saved, and selling the guitar that I had customized.
Now I miss my guitar, I miss my peaceful life. In short, I'm not happy, and I keep wishing that I could go back.
Please, help me.