Married and lonely

[Mrcal2nd]

Hey I’m married for 15 years but I feel lonely. My wife doesn’t communicate well and this has lead to many issues. We don’t see eye to eye and more often then not never resolve anything because we can’t talk about the issue. Through all of this I feel alone, feeling like I can’t talk to anyone. I’m at a loss on what to do now. We have not done counseling. I just want to be able to talk and feel as if I’m heard, I need to feel connected. I’m tired of feeling like this.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I've been there, so I know how you feel. Is counseling an option? Maybe even just go by yourself, it might help.

Welcome to ALL

 

[Minus]

Welcome to the forums.

 

[okidoke]

Welcome. I know your pain. Be honest and tell her how you feel. Counselling may help. If you don’t speak up, you’ll feel worse and worse and resentment may take hold.

 

[Mrcal2nd]

Welcome. I know your pain. Be honest and tell her how you feel. Counselling may help. If you don’t speak up, you’ll feel worse and worse and resentment may take hold.

That’s apart of the problem, she is full aware of how I feel.

 

[okidoke]

That’s apart of the problem, she is full aware of how I feel.

time for an ultimatum then to see where it can go. tell her there's no point continuing the relationship if she's not willing to help solidify what is left. maybe it's time to leave if she doesn't care. maybe that's what she wants too anyway. you need to confront her about it and if she won't talk about it, lay it on the line to her that you two either work to salvage what you have or you're leaving, or she agree to an open marriage where you can pursue some happiness elsewhere. She may not care about you, but doesn't want to separate for financial reasons or whatever, but might be okay with living separate lives under the same roof. Plenty people do that. You really need to find out what she wants.

 

[lovehimbutlonley]

Hey I’m married for 15 years but I feel lonely. My wife doesn’t communicate well and this has lead to many issues. We don’t see eye to eye and more often then not never resolve anything because we can’t talk about the issue. Through all of this I feel alone, feeling like I can’t talk to anyone. I’m at a loss on what to do now. We have not done counseling. I just want to be able to talk and feel as if I’m heard, I need to feel connected. I’m tired of feeling like this.

Hi, first off I want to say I completely understand what you are saying and feel the same way in my relationship myself. My husband and I got married almost 2 years ago but we have been together for almost 9 now. We came from completely different back grounds and honestly don't know how we have made it this far other than for our girls .... Don't get me wrong I love him and for some reason would follow him to the end of the world... But like you we don't see eye to eye on hardly anything,and if you ask him I'm always wrong... Or there is no resolution except that I am so much a people pleaser and don't like confrontation I usually bend to his will to some degree about 4 years into our relationship we moved from where I grew up to his home town leaving me with only his family close by I worked with his mom's only had his sister(whom he doesn't like)as a friend of you'd call it that literally only his people well, I have finally broke free of that and tried making friends outside of them so I didn't feel so lonely and unheard but that blew up also be the friend I thought I made ended up screwing his best friend all while both being in a relationship... Guess my judgement sucks all the way around.... All this just to be said you are not alone we love who we love but where does that leave us?

 

[Techno]

Hey I’m married for 15 years but I feel lonely. My wife doesn’t communicate well and this has lead to many issues. We don’t see eye to eye and more often then not never resolve anything because we can’t talk about the issue. Through all of this I feel alone, feeling like I can’t talk to anyone. I’m at a loss on what to do now. We have not done counseling. I just want to be able to talk and feel as if I’m heard, I need to feel connected. I’m tired of feeling like this.

I feel you; I have the same problem in my marriage. Thats why I am here. To find people with same interests.

 

[Taco63cyn]

Hey I’m married for 15 years but I feel lonely. My wife doesn’t communicate well and this has lead to many issues. We don’t see eye to eye and more often then not never resolve anything because we can’t talk about the issue. Through all of this I feel alone, feeling like I can’t talk to anyone. I’m at a loss on what to do now. We have not done counseling. I just want to be able to talk and feel as if I’m heard, I need to feel connected. I’m tired of feeling like this.

I get it, I'm here with an ear ...married 25 years ., Things have changed

 

[Helloworld]

Hey I’m married for 15 years but I feel lonely. My wife doesn’t communicate well and this has lead to many issues. We don’t see eye to eye and more often then not never resolve anything because we can’t talk about the issue. Through all of this I feel alone, feeling like I can’t talk to anyone. I’m at a loss on what to do now. We have not done counseling. I just want to be able to talk and feel as if I’m heard, I need to feel connected. I’m tired of feeling like this.

Hello, it's sad to hear that. I feel like you should some time for yourself and maybe have a different view on your situation. Maybe a change of environment can help. You can go hiking, traveling and stuff like that, alone, or with friends you know? You can talk about your situation with your friends if you feel comfortable, maybe they can open some options for you to consider

 

[Helloworld]

That’s apart of the problem, she is full aware of how I feel.

Oh, if she's aware about how you feel and does nothing about it, then maybe she feels like she cannot change. Do you know the reason why she doesn't want to change / why she feels she cannot change ? You can ask about the reason, just to know it, not to judge it, so that you can think about it later.

 

[Taco63cyn]

Hey I’m married for 15 years but I feel lonely. My wife doesn’t communicate well and this has lead to many issues. We don’t see eye to eye and more often then not never resolve anything because we can’t talk about the issue. Through all of this I feel alone, feeling like I can’t talk to anyone. I’m at a loss on what to do now. We have not done counseling. I just want to be able to talk and feel as if I’m heard, I need to feel connected. I’m tired of feeling like this.

Hello, Just you wanting to talk about it is a good sign., was it always like that in your marriage? Is there anything you have similar interest in?