After 3 years I still miss my ex

[user 150037]

I have no references but i imagine its no different to when someone you care about dies - you never stop missing them - you just get used to them not being around.

 

[Hawx79]

I have no references but i imagine its no different to when someone you care about dies - you never stop missing them - you just get used to them not being around.

Yes exactly this. My heart is broken and I am tired, depressed. Even though I still long for new love, I feel I am too tired to care anymore or make serious effort.

 

[user 150037]

Have you reached out to support groups? There's sure to be a few in your area - i dont know where you are based but there should be.

The trouble is that by telling yourself that you'll never get over her and that nobody can replace her you're reenforcing the notion that you can't move on.

Maybe try a support group and focus on friendship? And make it about forming new connections rather than replacing old ones.

In the interest of ceasing idolization write down a list of the things you liked about your ex and ask yourself 'What makes her more special than anyone else?'.

Because you might find those traits in someone new and come to the conclusion that your ex wasnt all that.

 

[Hawx79]

Have you reached out to support groups? There's sure to be a few in your area - i dont know where you are based but there should be.

The trouble is that by telling yourself that you'll never get over her and that nobody can replace her you're reenforcing the notion that you can't move on.

Maybe try a support group and focus on friendship? And make it about forming new connections rather than replacing old ones.

In the interest of ceasing idolization write down a list of the things you liked about your ex and ask yourself 'What makes her more special than anyone else?'.

Because you might find those traits in someone new and come to the conclusion that your ex wasnt all that.

Thanks for your feedback.

 

[LonelySgt]

Thanks for your feedback.

Don’t know if my reply will ignite hot ashes but you are not the only one here who wonders about the what ifs. I personally do all the time with a few prior relationships. They all as placed in the back of the mind soon as I find someone to date.

A guise man once said, “don’t listen to your thoughts, they come from the devil to chop you down” -Jesse Lee Peterson

Best way I have done to minimize those regretful thoughts is to stay busy. Although I am not actively looking for someone I know God our creator will present to me someone and I’m not rushing it anymore. Posted a bit ago and was given good advice and I do believe things happen for a reason. Just know that every step you take and direction towards which you are headed is meant for you and you alone. Stay strong brother! That special someone will find you, don’t rush it though

 

[movinggirl]

I did this with someone. I'm a lot more over him now. My life filled up with other things. I moved and I'm happy. I still wonder how he is but I no longer ruminate over him