Alcohol - More Trouble Than Its Worth

[Jim78]

Since being a teenager I've always drank alcohol to ease my discomfort in social situations, but am now beginning to think it's been more of a curse than a blessing. I start off uncomfortable and awkward, so have a few drinks to "relax", but by the time i feel sufficiently relaxed and at ease I'm far more drunk than I want to be and end up coming across as an idiot! I've decided to try and cut alcohol out and try things straight-headed, but I'm so used to it, it's hard reverting back to the old and unpleasant way of dealing with people . What's also hard is trying to avoid alcohol in the first place; if I do go out somewhere, everyone is drinking! I don't have many friends theses days and all of them drink. I can't afford to lose them.

Has anyone else had any experience using booze like this, then trying to give it up?

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Has anyone else had any experience using booze like this, then trying to give it up?

I haven't, but I've got around problems by just barely drinking in the first place.

I enjoy a small slug of whiskey every now and then and occasionally have a pint of beer or ale. That's about it though.

So far it's been pretty good: I've never been drunk or had the dreaded "hangover" and I've also avoided any inebriated foolishness

On the other hand, I've completely missed out on drunken cuddles and kisses (that is to say, 99.9% of the opportunities people have to kiss these days...)

But yeah, if I ever go out (it's quite rare) I just drink a non-alcoholic beverage and don't tell people. That way there's no awkwardness. Failing that, I just make a beer last a really long time.

 

[Tiina63]

Could you just have one or two drinks so that you feel relaxed but are in control? Or would you not be able to stop at one or two? (I don't ask this in a judgemental manner, because as an ex smoker I am in no position to criticise anyone else's habits.)
If you would find it hard to stop after one ot two, then maybe stick to soft drinks.

 

[LoneKiller]

Hi Jim78.
My deepest sympathies regarding the pain you are going through right now. I've been sober for a little north of a decade now and have experienced everything that you are currently.

If you want to give up alcohol, or any drug for that matter, you have to be willing to suffer. There's no way around it. You must avoid bars and other social activities where alcohol is around until you are strong enough to resist the craving for it, and yes, I understand how tough this can be with bars and liquor stores almost everywhere you go.

You can't really go through life hoping that society is going to be there to help you quit and stay that way. You must have a true desire to kick as well.

I understand that you don't want to lose your friends who are actively drinking, but you must right now. If they are any kind of friends, they will understand. I know it's tough sitting home on a Saturday night, while they are out "Bar Hopping" and having a great time, but it comes with the territory. Nobody said that quitting was a picnic.

You must summon your inner strength and through hard work and sincere desire, quit. Pour that beer or spirits down the Goddamn sink. It's not going to be easy. It's going to suck, but surely it's much better than liver failure which will inevitably come if you continue to drink too much or use it to mask hurtful feelings.

The body can only take so much abuse, then it will break down. Never, ever use alcohol as a tool to relax or drown away your suffering. If you open that door, you will encounter a truly horrendous thing behind it.

Stay strong. It's a tough battle, but one that you can win, and when you do, the feeling is awesome. Your self respect will increase, others will respect that as well. You will become a stronger and happier person, I promise you.

If you feel that you are craving a drink, before you tip the bottle, please pm me, and we will see if we can't get by it.

Don't let this beat you. Crush it in your hands. It took a lot of courage from you to come here for help, now use that same courage to rip this problem to shreds.

 

[Poguesy]

I'm far more drunk than I want to be and end up coming across as an idiot!

Apart from my obvious self everyone who is drunk comes across as a stupid idiot

That is one thing i can reassure you about.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

AA in an option.

i been on the giving end and recueving end of alcoholism.

if i go into details of personal horror stories and experince...
youll be grateful or think im full of honeysuckle..
As muxh as i post on here....theres alot i leave out.
its too horufying and really tragic.

k...heres some suggestions to your question...
focus on sonetine else.
Dont focus on not drinking....as you already
notice the more you tried to stop...the more
you wanna get drunk.

depending on your condition....theres going
to be a withdraw and detox stage.

make new friebds for a while. its not going to
kill you. Alcoholism might kill you though.

---

i lnow its not easy to not see beyound what you
currently see. your current life style.....

but theres more to life than just getting drunk
and chasing drunk women.
I assume you dont go to bars and wanna fresia your
pals.....lol
yes, i know.....i prefer Ginger over MarryvAnn too.

 

[passage]

Ya, I just spent the night with drunk people. I understand your situation as I often do the same. I'd simply suggest knowing your tolerance very well. For example, I know how much I can drink on an empty, less than full stomach, or full stomach to "loosen" me up a little. I also know how much to drink and when to stop drinking to avoid feeling like crap the next day. Personally, I very very rarely have hangovers, or pukefest 4000's from alcohol because I know my limits.

Having said that if you truly feel you have a problem with alcohol, take the advice that others have given here.

 

[sorat116]

Hi. I also am having similar problems with alcohol. I am a freshman in college and joined a sorority (where all that everyone does is drink) and I have been hospitalized twice in the same year for alcohol poisoning and my blood pressure was 80/30 which is pretty much death. Apparently I have an issue with my blood pressure so I can no longer drink.. well, the problem is, all of my friends drink when they go out and I love to go out and have a good time. But I can't let my parents down again, so I never do drink. But I am like you, I sometimes use the alcohol to loosen up and relax in social situations, but in the end you will be happy that you stopped.. it can be addictive and ruin your life.

You can still have fun without it, and most of the time once everyone else is wasted, they won't even realize you're not drinking especially if you are holding a drink in your hand. I have been out sober with my friends since I made the discovery that I have the this health problem, and I still had a good time because everyone gets loud once they drink and are in party atmospheres so it's a lot easier to loosen up. It just takes some getting used too. Hope I helped!

 

[ajdass1]

I drink very rarely now. I've done the whole student thing of getting very drunk and blacking out and puking, and I pretty much hated it.

Also I'm a total lightweight. It only takes 2 pints to send me tipsy.

The way I deal with it now is to decline drinks when people ask, or to alternate - 1 pint of cider, 1 of water, etc. The trick is to be completely unashamed and unrepentant about it, despite the fact that people *will* look at you funny or make fun of you. If you adopt a mature attitude about it you can still go out with other people drinking and have a good time.

Of course, there are parties where the whole purpose is to get roaring drunk. I don't particularly like these kinds of parties, so I just don't go to those when I sense that's how it'll turn out. Going to the pub with a few friends or a bar for a few drinks, that's fine.

 

[Jim78]

Thanks for the replies and I apologize for vanishing (i've been in an accident amongst other things). Well, i haven't stopped drinking but i have decided to change my habits. I've cut down drastically and might do so even more.I feel better for it and started to notice the situations where i'm likely to overdo it before i get to that point. I would like to stop though still. Next time I go out i'm gonna attempt it sober

 

[DiscoSpider]

Thanks for the replies and I apologize for vanishing (i've been in an accident amongst other things). Well, i haven't stopped drinking but i have decided to change my habits. I've cut down drastically and might do so even more.I feel better for it and started to notice the situations where i'm likely to overdo it before i get to that point. I would like to stop though still. Next time I go out i'm gonna attempt it sober

Geeze, Jim78. An accident? I hope you are okay. : Same goes with anyone else who may be involved.

Good work on changing your habits! The first step is always the hardest, but you're on the right path! Good job so far! Every step you take is a successful step!

I used to drink a lot too. In my days of obesity (before I lost my weight and got fit and healthy) I used to get pretty **** drunk once or twice a week. When I lost my weight, I stopped drinking nearly as much.

I'll be honest - I do drink every now and then, maybe once or twice a month and sometimes depending on the occasion I will get completely wasted but when I drink - most of the time I do so in a responsible, controlled manner. The only "exceptions" happen to be say... a close friend's birthday, or something for example.

As I just mentioned before in another thread... I have a friend who drinks, a lot. He drinks almost every night to the point where he passes out and can remember little to nothing of the night before. Quite often when he drinks, he loses control and does VERY stupid things... he has wet himself, he has physically hurt himself, he makes girls very uncomfortable when he drinks, he often gets into arguments and even physical fights with his own friends and even physical fights with complete strangers. He has even lost friends because of his behaviour when drinking... over the past few years he's also put on A LOT of weight from drinking.

I guess my point is... I see no problem with drinking responsibly in moderation every now and then when the occasion calls for it. Drinking does become a problem though when you're doing it often and to the point of getting heavily intoxicated.

We all know drinking isn't good for your liver. We all know it can make you put on weight. We all know it has the potential to make one lose control of their self, to do things one wouldn't normally do - putting one's social life and even one's own life at risks... drinking can also be very expensive on our wallets too!

Good call to cut out drinking from your life, that's an excellent choice.

Good luck to you and all the best!

 

[ajdass1]

Thanks for the replies and I apologize for vanishing (i've been in an accident amongst other things). Well, i haven't stopped drinking but i have decided to change my habits. I've cut down drastically and might do so even more.I feel better for it and started to notice the situations where i'm likely to overdo it before i get to that point. I would like to stop though still. Next time I go out i'm gonna attempt it sober

Well done! I like the fact that you're noticing when you're overdoing and stopping before then. That's a really good place to be imo, better than just going teetotal and not really learning anything.

And I hope you're alright after the accident!

 

[Copacel]

now drinking some fine alcohol

i have to say is really gud.

 

[Gutted]

Luckily I've never had any problems with Alcohol. The only stuff I drink is WKD. Otherwise it's soft drinks all the way x]

 

[dannyr22]

Luckily I've never had any problems with Alcohol. The only stuff I drink is WKD. Otherwise it's soft drinks all the way x]

Try mixing the blue one with stella

But nobody should feel like they have to drink to numb the pain, but it's easy for me to say I have had the same trouble in the past, but with addiction to skunk weed

 

[PhoenixSoul]

I used to do the same thing, you just need to convince yourself that nothing bad will happen if people don'\t like you without beeing relaxed by alcohol.Not giving a **** can help sometimes.I just stopped drinking after beeing a usual consumer of like 10 liters of beer per day.Now i just drink before i sleep at night, it works better than a pill.Alcohol doesn't give u an addiction to it,you give it to yourself.

 

[Lonely in BC]

It is way more trouble than it's worth. I stopped for a beer last night and two guys (who had obviously been drinking for awhile) decided they had to harass me. When I was leaving they cornered me in the parking lot and I had to do some unpleasant things to get out of the situation. I've got a concussion (got hit with a beer can) and a black eye. I'm pretty sure one of them had to get medical care (he didn't get up and I didn't stick around). His buddy ran away when he realized it wasn't going to work out in their favor.

I feel like honeysuckle. I feel horrible about hurting someone. That beer so wasn't worth it.

fresia. I hate people.

Back to my exile.