Am living an empty life

[Lonely in London]

Hi to all my fellow users. This is my first thread on here.

Well as you can see from my username am from London, England. It is amazing that in a city so big and populated that someone like me can feel so lonely and cut off from society.

I am 20 year old man and i can honestly say that i have never had a friend in my life, because of my shy nature i have never been in a relationship. Most people my age are having fun and enjoying life, whilst i stay at home lonely and friendless. The past few years have been really difficult for me, i just dont know why my life has turned out this way. When i was at school i was never one to say much but there were people that i used to hang out with, but now i have no one.

Am starting to get a deep anger inside of me because society do's not care about my pain, i can honestly say that i want to die. Am just not brave enough to take my own life, only God knows why my life is so empty and hopeless.

Am sure most of you reading this will understand some of my feelings, i need to communicate with people that share and undertand my pain because there is no one in my life i can share these views with.

 

[Sci-Fi]

There's another new user here that's from England, I just don't remember who at the moment.

It's not that you aren't brave enough to take your own life, it's that you are brave enough not to. It takes a lot to keep on facing the world when you feel like you do. But we push on an hope it gets better. You'll find a lot of people here who can relate to how you are feeling, it's a great place.

Welcome to the forums!

 

[Nina]

Hi lonely and welcome. I agree with Sci-Fi it's takes a lot more courage to stay in life then to exit it. You'll find friends in here. It's a good group with a lot of heart and a number of folks in your same situation. I look forward to reading your words. Sharing what's on your mind and in your heart is a good way to begin the process of opening up to folks. If you can do it in here you might be able to start doing it in real time...

 

[freedom]

hi, and welcome to the forum.

what Sci-Fi and Nina are saying is right. it takes a lot of courage to keep on moving forward when life is tough on you. i hope you can find the courage to move forward and see that life is worth living.

 

[jgstamp]

Iam so sorry how you feel, i am 39 and my self have lived in london for 3 years i to feel painfully lonely, i have run and run to escape this strangle hold, but with fail.
Now i so want to break free
I am going to face my arch enemy in the face and start going to group meetings where they go out, hoping it gets me out of this hole
I would be happy to meet up with you and others if they wish and just start living, its going to be strange odd arkward but we are going to have to over come this , i have not escaped it since i left school.
Please get back in touch please..

 

[charlyn]

Hi there, welcome to the site. Im from England too!

Sorry your feeling down, I think a lot of us here understand how you feel though. Just remember things can definately get better for you even when you feel that they can't.

 

[Lonely in London]

Thanks for the encouragement guys, its so hard you know. waking up everyday knowing that nothing good or exciting is going to happen. In a city this big you get lost in the madness of it, but i understand people around the world also share my pain. Am happy i've found this site, so i can communicate with people that understand what am going through.

 

[so very lonely]

Hello Lonely In London.

I know exactly how you feel. I live in London too. Have lived here all my life and don't have a single friend. Not very close to most of my family either. It was my 37th birthday yesterday and I didn't receive a single card. Just two emotionless text messages.

When I was your age, I felt much the way you did. I was shy and quiet and therefore deemed boring so I never really had any friends. Certainly didn't have a boyfriend. Later in life I had relations but nothing meaningful or long-lasting. But one of these relations did result in a child. If it wasn't for my daughter who is now 10, I wouldn't leave the house at all. But the more withdrawn and isolated I become is the more lonelier I feel.

I really understand you anger. I feel unwanted in all sectors of society; family, friends, partners and employers. Have no-one to talk to as people don't understand and think you're either pathetic and wallowing in self-pity or depressing company and to be avoided like the plague, so I would be happy to talk to or meet up with you (and jgstamp).

 

[Poueff]

Society doesn't care about your pain cause you probably haven't told anyone other than here. ANd tbh when you can scream that you're alone at the top of your lungs you'll already have a mate to back you up before you do it

 

[moonlight70]

I have seen many people here from London saying they feel very lonely. I moved to Paris some 8 months ago and every weekend is like a torture. It is ok that my mood and self-confidence haven't helped much, but it seems to ridiculous that in such
a dense city one can feel so lonely. I have been craving for real, deeper relationships, and I see myself stuck because I know
that it is unlikely that I will find this by going to random social meetings announced in the internet. I think I gave up trusting people, no one really cares except my mother who is thousands of miles away. It is sad, because I always thought this could be a wonderful place to live, but I am not being able to face this emptiness anymore.

 

[floffyschneeman]

It's not that you aren't brave enough to take your own life, it's that you are brave enough not to.

I like this


Welcome to the forum, I'm sure you will find a lot of friends here. Ending one's life is an acceptance that your life was just lame. Finding the courage to do something about it and doing it is what makes us brave. As long as we are breathing, we have the chance to better ourselves, our lives and do something for others, even with that thought, we can find a sense of happiness.

 

[kio]

it's a good thing that you didn't take your life! once you end it you can never take it back! Many ppl I know feel empty, I even feel empty and I also thought about taking my life... forget about the anger...let go of the anger. It's not that society doesn't care.. we care (we are a part of the society as well) we know your pain and loneliness, cause I think many of us felt it and are feeling it.. but mentally we are strong enough to recognize the fact that we are feeling lonely and we are trying to get over this feeling.
Society cares! but you are maybe a bit similar to me.. your problem is that you are shy.. that holds you back from telling other ppl who you are.. my problem is that I keep things for myself.. ppl only see the happy me but never the real me, never the loneliness...only the smiles.. I have a lot of friends, but still I feel lonely coz nobody sees the true me.. Maybe it's because of my culture. I was always told not to show the weakness inside you.. I am a man so you bleed but you don't cry..
Anyway I'm trying to slowly work things out.. I'm still actually afraid to let someone, close to me, see the real me so I'm taking some baby steps haha by posting my thoughts in my blog. http://www.iamkio.eu If you have time you can check it. i am kio
So i'm using my blog to try and open myself... even with this blog I sometimes find it hard to be open, coz what if someone who knows me sees it.
Anyway.. there was a time that I didn't had much friends as well but you will meet them if you go out. Don't stay at home! My advice is find a part-time job..you certainly will meet some nice colleagues with whom you can share life! And you will get some cash to buy some nice things!
some of my friends I met at my part-time job at the drugstore ( i was a lot younger then). But church is also a good place to get some friends, when we moved to the big city I had no one. So my mother took me to church and there I connected with some of my friends.
So my advice is to get out! Having some nice colleagues (mayb future friends). In my case I only temporarily forget about my loneliness when I'm with them but maybe it will cure yours!

 

[Tiina63]

I live in England, too, though am over 100 miles from London. I'm middle aged and very lonely so can understand how you are feeling. Maybe you could join some groups, reading groups (if you like to read) or writing groups, or groups for whatever it is you like. Even if you make no really close friends there, at least it will get you out of the house and will help you to polish up your social skills a bit. 'Get into reading' run some great reading groups for people with various problems and difficulties and the atmosphere is really warm and welcoming. You don't have to say anything if you feel too nervous to talk.

 

[sonu]

Hi to all my fellow users. This is my first thread on here.

Well as you can see from my username am from London, England. It is amazing that in a city so big and populated that someone like me can feel so lonely and cut off from society.

I am 20 year old man and i can honestly say that i have never had a friend in my life, because of my shy nature i have never been in a relationship. Most people my age are having fun and enjoying life, whilst i stay at home lonely and friendless. The past few years have been really difficult for me, i just dont know why my life has turned out this way. When i was at school i was never one to say much but there were people that i used to hang out with, but now i have no one.

Am starting to get a deep anger inside of me because society do's not care about my pain, i can honestly say that i want to die. Am just not brave enough to take my own life, only God knows why my life is so empty and hopeless.

Am sure most of you reading this will understand some of my feelings, i need to communicate with people that share and undertand my pain because there is no one in my life i can share these views with.

you just need a strong thought for few seconds to take your life away.. or you have the whole life of suffering in front of you.. this is what i think about my life and i chose to suffer.. i want to see how worst it can get for me in my life ahead.. i will face whatever life throws at me.. whether its being alone and get rejected by the whole world.. i will face it.. . i am 27 now and i am having lot of anger inside me right from my childhood.. you get angry when you are expecting something from someone or having lot of attatchment with people or things around you.. you then start thinking a lot about them.. de attach yourself from everything around you for sometime.. just for a change.. don't get angry.. stop thinking about others.. just stay calm... it helped me to live.. should help you also.. take care..

 

[fightclub]

I know just how you feel LONE IN LONDON I did a stint in London at 18 and was misrable as hell infact I was seriously concerned for my sanity in the end I was worried if I didnt get out of there I was going to go nuts. looking back I should have done a house share and met some people like that have you ever thought of doing that? dont want to seem like am telling you what to do just an idea, know things are not always that straight forward, if I had my own place I would say come up north for a break but I dont so cant help u on that score.