Anyone else feel like just moving and starting there life over in another place

[Mike510]

Where there's a will there's mostly a way (yes mostly lol) if you want it bad enough i am sure you can make it happen hun!

Yeah I am just nervous right now and I want it to work. It can either go good and I will be really happy or it could go very wrong and I could be laying in the snow freezing to death.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Aww :\

Well, good luck, Mikey. I hope it goes as planned for you.

 

[Mike510]

Thank you . I really hope it does to, I actually feel happy just thinking about being able to start my life over.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Thank you . I really hope it does to, I actually feel happy just thinking about being able to start my life over.

I know right. I feel the same way when I think about moving out sometime soon.

 

[Inspire]

WARNING: Story about how I made the choice to move and change my life, as well as topics about religion and finding one self. I am not religious and will not belittle religion, but I may say things I had previously thought about religion during that period of time. Just a warning, if you are sensitive to these topics.

I made the move with my parents to start my life completely over as soon as I graduated high school. High school was the worst time of my life, EVER. I lived in the Midwest and was raised by two different families: open-minded agnostics/atheists, and fundamentalist Christians. This is how it went:

Before I turned 18, my father and my stepmother (the atheists) had custody of me. I went to see my biological mother and step-father (the very religious ones) every other weekend, (I could choose when I saw them as a grew older). My father and stepmother have my little brother and my mother and stepfather have my two little sisters.
After my stepmom gave birth to my brother, she completely changed her attitude of me. We started to argue all of the time, I no longer deserved hugs and kisses from her, she yelled at me all of the time for my poor grades. She casted me away in such a manner that she treated me as a stranger and that my brother was her only child.
It got to the point where we would argue every single day. Maybe this was all in my head, but she would scour me out for flaws and belittle me for them. I became very depressed and lonely, and sought attention from boys at school, an eventually was sexually taken advantage by a man in his mid-twenties at my very first job at 16 years old.

I needed to find solace, needed to get back on track, find MYSELF. I expressed my depression and sadness to my biological mother, saying I wanted to give her a chance to finally have me live under her roof, for the first time since I was born. I said I missed my baby sisters and wanted to help take care if them, that I wanted to find peace and love in my life and heart. She gladly accepted, even rushed to move the family into a bigger house so they could give me a place called home.

I was in for another emotional roller coaster, and a few emotional slaps across the face with The Holy Bible.
I was so desperate for love and acceptance, that I wasn't thinking when I moved in with my religious family. I had forgotten that when my mother married my stepfather, that every time I came over, they would try to force Jesus into my heart, shove religion down my throat. It hurt that they could not accept me for who I was. Now, it was starting all over again.

I lived with them for a few months. Some good things happened: got my first car, passed high school, and in the summer started a great romantic relationship. None if this was good enough for my family, though. It was all déjà-vu. My mother and I started to argue a lot, except she screamed and was a lot scarier than my stepmom. One time when my boyfriend came over to visit me, she had started an argument with me and it turned into a screaming battle. My boyfriend took my hand and led me to my car, grabbed my keys and jumped in, locking the doors and rolling up the windows. Mom ran outside, screaming and then slamming on the windows of my car. I later drove over to her house in the middle of the night, writing a note that said, "I'M MOVING AWAY. YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF."

So, I moved back in with my Dad and stepmom. I slept in the basement until my stepmom got the news that we would be moving to [classified] for her new job. I was thrilled. A completely different area with amazing people, a great school (college) and new possibilities in life. We moved three weeks after that news, and lived in the apartment we rented in the new area for a year. Things were always bad between my stepmom and I, but as soon as I turned 19, I threw myself out if the house, not ready to take on the world. I was scared, but excited about what was waiting for me.

I got a nice apartment with my two then-roommates, got the job I work at now, and started a very happy, healthy lifestyle where I knew I was liked. I became so happy after that. I still am, even though I have my moments of loneliness. I have never regretted moving, even if I wasn't ready. It's an amazing and exciting experience. I love where I live, and love my circle of friends that I now consider family. The distance made me and both sides of my family grow so much closer. They miss me, and I miss them, but it was for the best.

Don't be afraid to throw yourself out there. It will be difficult at first, but I am sure that if you found the right place and people, you will thank yourself for moving and starting over.
Sorry about the LONG story. I don't want to turn the subject on me but I figured that you and I related at one point of time, and that I'd share my experience. Hope it helped.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Inspire, you have totally inspired me to really really work at moving out in a couple of years' time. Thanks for sharing that.

 

[Inspire]

Inspire, you have totally inspired me to really really work at moving out in a couple of years' time. Thanks for sharing that.

You are welcome, and thank you so much for reading that VERY long post! There is a lot more to the story that is deep, twisted and unnerving, but those things are to be discussed elsewhere or not even said at all. I am glad it helped you, though. If you need to talk about anything, let me know. I'm a great listener.

 

[ladyforsaken]

You are welcome, and thank you so much for reading that VERY long post! There is a lot more to the story that is deep, twisted and unnerving, but those things are to be discussed elsewhere or not even said at all. I am glad it helped you, though. If you need to talk about anything, let me know. I'm a great listener.

You could always create a thread about it to share. It's always interesting to read about people's stories and find some learning points from it too.

Oh and thanks - likewise.

 

[Mike510]

WARNING: Story about how I made the choice to move and change my life, as well as topics about religion and finding one self. I am not religious and will not belittle religion, but I may say things I had previously thought about religion during that period of time. Just a warning, if you are sensitive to these topics.

I made the move with my parents to start my life completely over as soon as I graduated high school. High school was the worst time of my life, EVER. I lived in the Midwest and was raised by two different families: open-minded agnostics/atheists, and fundamentalist Christians. This is how it went:

Before I turned 18, my father and my stepmother (the atheists) had custody of me. I went to see my biological mother and step-father (the very religious ones) every other weekend, (I could choose when I saw them as a grew older). My father and stepmother have my little brother and my mother and stepfather have my two little sisters.
After my stepmom gave birth to my brother, she completely changed her attitude of me. We started to argue all of the time, I no longer deserved hugs and kisses from her, she yelled at me all of the time for my poor grades. She casted me away in such a manner that she treated me as a stranger and that my brother was her only child.
It got to the point where we would argue every single day. Maybe this was all in my head, but she would scour me out for flaws and belittle me for them. I became very depressed and lonely, and sought attention from boys at school, an eventually was sexually taken advantage by a man in his mid-twenties at my very first job at 16 years old.

I needed to find solace, needed to get back on track, find MYSELF. I expressed my depression and sadness to my biological mother, saying I wanted to give her a chance to finally have me live under her roof, for the first time since I was born. I said I missed my baby sisters and wanted to help take care if them, that I wanted to find peace and love in my life and heart. She gladly accepted, even rushed to move the family into a bigger house so they could give me a place called home.

I was in for another emotional roller coaster, and a few emotional slaps across the face with The Holy Bible.
I was so desperate for love and acceptance, that I wasn't thinking when I moved in with my religious family. I had forgotten that when my mother married my stepfather, that every time I came over, they would try to force Jesus into my heart, shove religion down my throat. It hurt that they could not accept me for who I was. Now, it was starting all over again.

I lived with them for a few months. Some good things happened: got my first car, passed high school, and in the summer started a great romantic relationship. None if this was good enough for my family, though. It was all déjà-vu. My mother and I started to argue a lot, except she screamed and was a lot scarier than my stepmom. One time when my boyfriend came over to visit me, she had started an argument with me and it turned into a screaming battle. My boyfriend took my hand and led me to my car, grabbed my keys and jumped in, locking the doors and rolling up the windows. Mom ran outside, screaming and then slamming on the windows of my car. I later drove over to her house in the middle of the night, writing a note that said, "I'M MOVING AWAY. YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF."

So, I moved back in with my Dad and stepmom. I slept in the basement until my stepmom got the news that we would be moving to [classified] for her new job. I was thrilled. A completely different area with amazing people, a great school (college) and new possibilities in life. We moved three weeks after that news, and lived in the apartment we rented in the new area for a year. Things were always bad between my stepmom and I, but as soon as I turned 19, I threw myself out if the house, not ready to take on the world. I was scared, but excited about what was waiting for me.

I got a nice apartment with my two then-roommates, got the job I work at now, and started a very happy, healthy lifestyle where I knew I was liked. I became so happy after that. I still am, even though I have my moments of loneliness. I have never regretted moving, even if I wasn't ready. It's an amazing and exciting experience. I love where I live, and love my circle of friends that I now consider family. The distance made me and both sides of my family grow so much closer. They miss me, and I miss them, but it was for the best.

Don't be afraid to throw yourself out there. It will be difficult at first, but I am sure that if you found the right place and people, you will thank yourself for moving and starting over.
Sorry about the LONG story. I don't want to turn the subject on me but I figured that you and I related at one point of time, and that I'd share my experience. Hope it helped.

Wow I had no idea you went through so much. I have to admit I get along with my parents pretty well, although with my dad who is bipolar there are times he because physically and verbally abusive. I never got into religion much and it was never forced upon me, I can only imagine how rough that must be. For me I am mentally already in a moving stage, but I can't stop worrying about finding a roommate or a place to stay since I do not have a job and every landlord checks to make sure you have a solid job. not to mention the place I am moving has long and cold winters from October to mid April compared to where I live now we don't even get snow.

 

[jayme89]

I have recently graduated college, I haven't found a job yet, my friends have for the most part moved away, and my girlfriend who I was engaged to disappeared the moment she got a job. The only people I would really miss here is my parents, but I feel like if I don't move soon I am going to find a job here and feel commited to staying in this area the rest of my life. Not to mention I am still living with my parents, my mom kind of expects me to always live here and my dad has wanted me to have my own place for sometime now. I just don't want to look back on this time a couple years from now wondering what could of been if I took this oppertunity now.

Anyone ever felt like they wanted to start over some place new? Or has anyone actually done it?

I'm in the same boat as you. Recent grad, unemployed, BOTH parents expecting me to stay home. On top of that I have 3 very young sisters who guilt me about having even the slightest thought of not living with them. Its really tough. My biggest fear is to waste any more of my life because it's been wasted long enough. I have so many regrets and wish i could do so many things over again. I can only wish that I had the guts to pick up and move because that would involve so much in terms of finances, but on top of that I have the added burden of being guilted by my family to live at home.

 

[Mike510]

I'm in the same boat as you. Recent grad, unemployed, BOTH parents expecting me to stay home. On top of that I have 3 very young sisters who guilt me about having even the slightest thought of not living with them. Its really tough. My biggest fear is to waste any more of my life because it's been wasted long enough. I have so many regrets and wish i could do so many things over again. I can only wish that I had the guts to pick up and move because that would involve so much in terms of finances, but on top of that I have the added burden of being guilted by my family to live at home.

I know how that feels I am not sure how old you are but I am going to be 24 in September and I have yet to work and I am having trouble finding a job, it is tough. For me I am at the point right now where I look at it, I spent 23 almost 24 years to get a college education and that is all I have, I love my parents but I need to do what is best for me now so I can still have the life I want one day. Sitting here won't change much, I can keep applying for the same bussiness and I can keep getting older with nothing to show for myself or I can give it a try and if I fail maybe I could come back. For me I was given a bit of money when both my grandparents died so I see it as them helping me have the life I wanted. Luckily the place I am moving money goes a lot farther than here in California.

Right now my worries are what am I going to do when I arrive at my destination, how easily can I find a job, will I be able to meet people easier than I can here, how am I going to find a place to live since everyone checks your employment status before letting you rent an apartment. As well as a couple banking and credit card and ID card worries I have. But I am determained to make this happen in August, because I don't want to have to wait til April.

 

[Inspire]

I know how that feels I am not sure how old you are but I am going to be 24 in September and I have yet to work and I am having trouble finding a job, it is tough. For me I am at the point right now where I look at it, I spent 23 almost 24 years to get a college education and that is all I have, I love my parents but I need to do what is best for me now so I can still have the life I want one day. Sitting here won't change much, I can keep applying for the same bussiness and I can keep getting older with nothing to show for myself or I can give it a try and if I fail maybe I could come back. For me I was given a bit of money when both my grandparents died so I see it as them helping me have the life I wanted. Luckily the place I am moving money goes a lot farther than here in California.

Right now my worries are what am I going to do when I arrive at my destination, how easily can I find a job, will I be able to meet people easier than I can here, how am I going to find a place to live since everyone checks your employment status before letting you rent an apartment. As well as a couple banking and credit card and ID card worries I have. But I am determained to make this happen in August, because I don't want to have to wait til April.

You probably have this done or someone else has told you already, but I would get a professional to look over your résumé and make t look amazing. Selling yourself to a company before a possible interview is the way to we a job in this economy. They aren't going to hire just anyone- and you aren't a nobody! You have a degree in your profession and you are ready to show what you are worth! Try applying for internships as well, and maybe you can even keep a job there for a while when they decide I keep you (since you're not a nobody!) and maybe you can either transfer and add that to your amazing résumé. Sell yourself. I know up can do it, and I'll be here to keep incouraging you!

Also, are you working a job now that doesn't involve your profession? If you are not, I would get a job that does not require a college degree- a barista, cashier, ANYTHING to add to your work experience. If you are thinking about moving in August, start applying now so that you can say you worked at that job for at least a year, and you can add business references to your resume. The great thing is, you can use that paycheck money to save up for moving and starting your new life. Working a lower-tier job would push you to be inspired to get a better job. I don't know EVERYTHING, but this is the advice I could give so far. Good luck!

 

[xaero]

Many, many times.

 

[onmyown1979]

In the same boat. The city that I grew up in is quickly dying, no good jobs hardly, little worthwhile women and little opportunity. My friends that I met in college have been asking me for years to come to their city which is like three hours away and now I think is the perfect time. I have an interview for a job there in a month or so and it pays close to what I make working my two jobs, a relative is willing to give me her apartment with furniture and everything if she decides to move out of state. All I have to do is nail the interview, lol. I'm a little nervous but it HAS to better their than here

 

[Gutted]

I have thought about this but have yet to do it. Back when I was 19, I thought about moving north. In London, rent on your average house these days is around £110 per week. If not more. Up north in County Durham, it's more like £70. I'm on the housing list there and I've found housing available for just £50 per week. My only problem is that everything is here. I don't have too much of a reason to need to go. My friends and what family I have are here. I have more job prospects here. People who are not from here like the sound of me being from here. I'm better off staying at the moment. I think I will only move for the right person and if I don't have much to lose.

 

[Inspire]

I have thought about this but have yet to do it. Back when I was 19, I thought about moving north. In London, rent on your average house these days is around £110 per week. If not more. Up north in County Durham, it's more like £70. I'm on the housing list there and I've found housing available for just £50 per week. My only problem is that everything is here. I don't have too much of a reason to need to go. My friends and what family I have are here. I have more job prospects here. People who are not from here like the sound of me being from here. I'm better off staying at the moment. I think I will only move for the right person and if I don't have much to lose.

I really like the point you have. You are honest with yourself and know that home is sweet home, and if you are happy an have everything you need there, then why move? Do the things for yourself that you really NEED for yourself. Thanks for sharing this.

 

[Waffle]

-

As your name suggests Inspire, your story is very inspiring. I agree with the other poster that perhaps you should share your life story in own thread. Its not easy throwing self into the world so young and I believe others who are afraid could get a lot of comfort and hope from your positive story.
Thank you for sharing, it certainly made me feel better as I am in a similar situation.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Some days I wish I could just pick up and completely disappear. Tell no one, leave no notes, just vanish off the face of the planet.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Right now, yes.

I am living in a situation where I'm literally surrounded by idiots. My sister and her five kids are horrible, my neighbors are horrible, and I'm getting tired of Cincinnati and the same faces.

I'd like to move someplace like South Carolina or Canada. Someplace cold.

 

[ladyforsaken]

I'd like to move someplace like South Carolina or Canada. Someplace cold.

Isn't SC more hot than cold? Or maybe I'm wrong...