Best Friend Issues.

[toshy.]

I have this best friend I've know her for four years. She wants me to basically stop being friends with one of my friends, because she had a fight with him and he made her upset. but, the thing is this has happened many times before, I have stopped being friends with three friends before because she started disliking them and had a fight with them.

I don't know what to do? I've told her I still want to be friends with him because I like him, but she just says "If your a real friend you'll stick up for me and not be his friend" Although, I have stuck up for her loads of times and stopped being friends with my other friends, just because she finds them annoying or starts hating them for no reason at all...
I feel like i'm being pushed around, like she owns me. It's like I cant be friends with anyone but her. She also does this when I get a boyfriend, she hates them for no reason at all. What should I do? Is she a real friend?

 

[SophiaGrace]

Uhm, a real friend would want you to be happy. :l

 

[Sci-Fi]

Oh gotta love that kind of drama. She's being selfish, a real friend would never say something like that unless they had a real good reason. If she can't give you a real reason why she doesn't like them then you can't be expected to just drop people because of her. What's better, to lose 1 friend or...how many you up to now including this one? Four?

 

[toshy.]

Oh gotta love that kind of drama. She's being selfish, a real friend would never say something like that unless they had a real good reason. If she can't give you a real reason why she doesn't like them then you can't be expected to just drop people because of her. What's better, to lose 1 friend or...how many you up to now including this one? Four?

Apparently she doesn't like him because he annoys her, and also because he said she is not friends with those people anymore because it's her fault, which made her really angry.

 

[SophiaGrace]

part of abuse is to isolate and control. keep that in mind.

 

[toshy.]

part of abuse is to isolate and control. keep that in mind.

thanks, I will.

 

[Sci-Fi]

She doesn't sound like someone who you'd want to be friends with. If a friend ever said that to me I'd tell them that they can't dictate who I am friends with, if they don't like them that is their problem not mine.

The only time I'd expect a friend to do that is if the person I was being friends with was toxic. Kind of like your best friend, seems like she doesn't get along well with others.

 

[VanillaCreme]

You let a person dictate something to you one time, and they'll think they can always do it. Personally, I would tell her that I was sorry dude made her upset, but that's not my problem, and she can stop talking to him all she wants. Other people can talk to him if they want to though. Don't let her dictate who you can and can't talk to. I've known a few people like that, and I've just ignored them when they're like that.

 

[ajdass1]

She's being totally unreasonable. You should be friends with whoever you damn well want.

If you say to a reasonable person, "I understand that you don't like Murgatroid, and I respect your opinion, but Murgatroid has never done me wrong and I still enjoy hanging out with them." Then they should really say, "Well, that's fine, as long as you don't force me to hang out with Murgatroid." In fact, if you show that you can think for yourself and be reasonable, people will tend to have more respect for you regardless of whether they like your friends or not.

It just doesn't sound like she has any respect for you. If she did she'd respect that you have the right to choose your own friends.

 

[Ak5]

She wants to own you, don't let her.