Cleaning my life up starting a year ago

[MandyJ]

Cleaning my life up a year ago has been going well.I hung around the bad crowd getting arrested a few times including tickets issued.Was arrested for an assaulting a police officer and got probation for it.Includes stealing a car which I did time for.Tickets,minor in possession for alcohol and Marijuana.This all started when I was 13.I did not care and my parents were right,was going to end up in prison.One night,an ex boyfriend wanted to rob a house and he brought a shot gun that was stolen.Home owner came our,threw the shot to me and pressured me to shoot him.I did and I was 17 when it happened.I decided to tell the truth and confessed to shooting the home owner whom passed.Charged with murder as an adult,took a plea deal doing 25 years.Luckily his family forgave me,shown remorse.The ex boyfriend,testified against him and he is doing a life sentence without parole.Was released last year and knew to clean my life up.Got my GED first and then an owner of a transmission repair shop gave me a job offer.Also worked things out with my parents which has gone very well.

 

[Adamridge79]

Here, you do 2/3 of a sentence then the rest on Parole. States and countries vary. Just personal curiosity on the amount of time you actually served.

 

[MandyJ]

Here, you do 2/3 of a sentence then the rest on Parole. States and countries vary. Just personal curiosity on the amount of time you actually served.

I did all 25 years

 

[Forgottendanfan]

You seem to be quite keen on broadcasting the crimes you've committed. I hope you're not wearing them as some kind of "badge of honour". I think if I'd killed someone, I wouldn't particularly want to announce it to a community of strangers on the internet.

 

[MandyJ]

You seem to be quite keen on broadcasting the crimes you've committed. I hope you're not wearing them as some kind of "badge of honour". I think if I'd killed someone, I wouldn't particularly want to announce it to a community of strangers on the internet.

I do not let out the name of the guy.I also did get involved in a program for troubled teens telling them my story.Still do this and changed 90% of their lives

 

[Forgottendanfan]

I do not let out the name of the guy.I also did get involved in a program for troubled teens telling them my story.Still do this and changed 90% of their lives

While it's good for you that you've turned your life around, as far as I'm concerned, if you break into someone's home and kill them in cold blood, no amount of getting involved in programmes, doing talks about it etc. can even begin to compensate for it.

 

[Abstamyous]

First off, thanks for sharing your story. I got chills reading it, as I cannot imagine being on either side of the murder.

Obviously, I know nothing other than what you've said here. But I do know theres people in the world who truly would need to hear this story, whether they are on the brink of making the same kind of choices or because they've served their time and feel alone.

It's easy to say people don't deserve the second chance or can never change the way things are..but service is about the people you are reaching out to, not yourself. So I applaud you for putting yourself out there and allowing yourself to see the impact you are having as well.

I can have personal feelings for all criminals, but you served your time. And if the family has forgiven you, that's huge. Cherish that gift. That was certainly brave on their part as well.

Also, welcome to the forum!

 

[kaetic]

Whatever happened, you did your time and the victims family even saw fit to forgive you.

I wish you the best of luck in turning your life around. It sounds like you've already made a great start.
I work in a factory that doesn't shy away from hiring ex cons and rehabilitated addicts. (I think the govt gives them incentives to hire them) Many times it doesn't work out, they slip back into their old patterns and leave. Sometimes they get arrested and fired, but usually they just quit.
However, there's at least one person I know who has been to prison and turned her life around. I never asked her what she did, but she was also in rehab, so I imagine it has something to do with that. She is a hard worker and has the sort of determination that I wish I had. She helps her cousin with her foster kids. And, she goes to therapy and group meetings regularly. She said something to me once about self care being really important. So, she used to go get her nails done as her self care. They were pretty but unfortunately impractical for factory work. She's worked with me for about... 6 years now?

I guess my point is, stay determined because change is possible. But, don't forget to do something for yourself as well.

Keep doing those programs. You can't change that someone was killed, and there's no such thing as balancing the scales, but if telling your story helps keep young kids from making the same mistake then it's well worth the work.

 

[user 135067]

Crime only pays when you are already rich. I'm glad you are following the straight and narrow. You are now helping kids to not mess their lives up? That's great. People, kids especially aren't normally bad people. They get to where they see no place to go and desperation drives their thinking. If you help them find a path they might make something of themselves.

Sorry for your past. It sounds like you were dragged down by the crowd you were with. I narrowly avoid that myself. Did some dumb stuff. Nearly got caught. That was enough to scare myself straight. Funny thing... during my crime years I was almost always broke... hence the crimes. I got myself turned around and while I never got to a point of opulence I kept the bills paid.

The hardest thing to accept is that life is about building it brick by brick. Few can walk right into success. It takes time. Patience and a goal are the best tools for young people to learn. Help them find those and they might stand a chance.

Best of luck.