Death anyone?

[ladyforsaken]

^Well it came across as such to me. Apologies to have gotten it wrong, then.

 

[Lacrecia]

^Well it (has not come) across as such to me. Apologies to have gotten it wrong, then.

It's ok. It's good to correct each other's mistakes.

 

[cumulus.james]

Bloody helpline I speak to called the police thought I was gonna kill myself. I thought they would section me. My jumper had blood on it and I had a razor blade and blood soaked tissue on the desk.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Bloody helpline I speak to called the police thought I was gonna kill myself. I thought they would section me. My jumper had blood on it and I had a razor blade and blood soaked tissue on the desk.

What happened after the police were called?

 

[cumulus.james]

Just buzzes on the intercom on my appartment and I though oh ****! then they came in and said that the helpline called them and they were concerned about me. And I had cuts to my arm and razor blades and stuff and I thought "f***king hell their gonna section me".

They were nicer thant they should have been.

 

[SophiaGrace]

So they talked with you and then they left or?

 

[cumulus.james]

Yeh they talked and left. But triggerd me cos one of them had the kind of beard of some old guy I went with when I was a kid. So it was like I struggeld to see his face I sort of superimposed the other guys face on him and I could not concentrate. kind of felt confused like I was seeing some other face but recognising a real face or something. I dunno.

Was diagnosed with depersonalization when I first came to the mental health services. I don't really know what that is but I think its like what I just mentioned.

Don't mean to be mentally ill. Normal peopel think I do this **** on purpose.

 

[ringwood]

This is a description of depersonalization: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-...ization-disorder/basics/symptoms/con-20033401

I suffer from this, nowadays not nearly as often as earlier in my life, but in my case it was a symptom (among others) of extreme anxiety.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Would you say you had a flashback? Trauma related you think? or completely different?

 

[cumulus.james]

This is a description of depersonalization: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-...ization-disorder/basics/symptoms/con-20033401

I suffer from this, nowadays not nearly as often as earlier in my life, but in my case it was a symptom (among others) of extreme anxiety.

Hey thanks, but I don't like reading about it. makes me feel like I crossed the line from poor mental health to full on propper crazy

---

Would you say you had a flashback? Trauma related you think? or completely different?

I get flashbacks yeh

Invovling the blood after you know what.

 

[SophiaGrace]

No i meant superimposing your old bfs face on the cops face. was that a flashback?

 

[ringwood]

Derealization/depersonalization doesn't mean you're crazy, far from it. It's simply a symptom of anxiety, a way of your brain and body coping when you get overwhelmed. Reading about the issues that affect you is a very important way of understanding what is going on with yourself, learning how to cope when you do feel strange and most likely will alleviate some of the stress and worry you've placed on yourself.

 

[cumulus.james]

Derealization/depersonalization doesn't mean you're crazy, far from it. It's simply a symptom of anxiety, a way of your brain and body coping when you get overwhelmed. Reading about the issues that affect you is a very important way of understanding what is going on with yourself, learning how to cope when you do feel strange and most likely will alleviate some of the stress and worry you've placed on yourself.

I don't like the fact I am severely mentally ill. From that first time the list of diagnoses and symptoms keeps growing and I really don't like it. People think you are a danger or wierdo.

I just wan't to be normal.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Okay then we can focus and build on your strengths to build you up instead of focusing on your issues.

 

[beautiful loser]

I just lost my cat yesterday, maybe have a care for what you post and how it might affect others.

I'm sorry to hear about your cat, wormser

 

[SophiaGrace]

I just lost my cat yesterday, maybe have a care for what you post and how it might affect others.

I totally missed this.

((Ringwood))

 

[stb]

Was the only selfish thing I ever remember him doing. Been many years and I can't say I'll ever really forgive him.

Really? and you aren't selfish for wanting him to continue in pain? He probably suffered in silence if it's the only selfish thing you can think of that he did.

He had more close friends than anyone I know, and he never asked a one for help. He left behind a new born baby that will never know him.
I never said I wasn't selfish for what it's worth.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Was the only selfish thing I ever remember him doing. Been many years and I can't say I'll ever really forgive him.

Really? and you aren't selfish for wanting him to continue in pain? He probably suffered in silence if it's the only selfish thing you can think of that he did.

He had more close friends than anyone I know, and he never asked a one for help. He left behind a new born baby that will never know him.
I never said I wasn't selfish for what it's worth.

I wonder if they were really close friends if nobody knew what he was going through. To be able to put on an act like that...it probably required a lot of emotional energy.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Sorry this is off-topic.

^Well it came across as such to me. Apologies to have gotten it wrong, then.

^Well it (has not come) across as such to me. Apologies to have gotten it wrong, then.

It's ok. It's good to correct each other's mistakes.

There was no need for you to put words into my post that was not said by me. You didn't have to correct it, for whatever reason. I sincerely apologised for my misinterpretation of your post there and what I wrote in that post was not a mistake. It was the truth. Why did you do that?

 

[Erevetot]

Derealization/depersonalization doesn't mean you're crazy, far from it. It's simply a symptom of anxiety, a way of your brain and body coping when you get overwhelmed. Reading about the issues that affect you is a very important way of understanding what is going on with yourself, learning how to cope when you do feel strange and most likely will alleviate some of the stress and worry you've placed on yourself.

I don't like the fact I am severely mentally ill. From that first time the list of diagnoses and symptoms keeps growing and I really don't like it. People think you are a danger or wierdo.

I just wan't to be normal.

you ARE normal. You are a human, that's how humans are. We're not perfect. You had a bad past that hurt you and still haunts you, don't blame yourself for it. It's not your fault. Sadly, we don't get to choose fully what happens in our life.

While trying to find what troubles you and fighting it may help overcome it, sometimes focusing on that, and reaching the root of the problem may make things worse.
I'd say stop trying to find all your flaws, and focus on your good parts, get some confidence and try to stop disliking yourself so much. You are not alone, Im pretty sure the majority of us on these forums have issues too, and trust me, we dont see you as a weirdo or a freak. You're just a normal person that had a rough life, that's it, there is nothing wrong about it, other than the fact that it sucks that you dont feel good.