Does having a conversation has value on its own for you?

[a person]

I'ts hard for me even to get myself to writing this here, it seems pointless, communication is something that I find harder as I get older. What is worth saying? I feel like nothing is, not even this, but I have to write something. Well, I don't have to, I don't have to write, or say or do anything, I don't even have to live, but I'm not dying anytime soon, and I wish I wasn't alone, and communicating with other people makes me feel less lonely, but is very hard, mainly because I feel there is nothing worth saying and I can't find value in it. I know it doesn't matter the topic (or I think so), two people chatting about the weather or meaningless gossip can be as productive as two people sharing ideas on life or philosophy, in the end the topic is just a medium, or an excuse. That's the way I see it. And I feel like I've already said so much, but I'm still alone, so it's hard for me to find it useful. Does that make sense to you? Or do you value a conversation even if nothing else came from it? I'm talking mainly about chatting with stranger on the internet, not friends or acquaintances.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

I don't think anything in particular, including socializing has to have, 'value.' The stars and the moon don't have value. Maybe some day some one will think of a way that the moon can have value; but, it's just the moon.

I don't think we have to live in a Universe of value, and purpose, and all that. We can value certain things, sure. I value manners, thoughtfulness, consideration, caring, understanding, compassion, and such; but, that just describes my feelings on such matters, or my inclinations...

I've known people, myself included, that go through extremely long bouts of social isolation, while pretty much carrying on with the same routine. It used to be that, back in the day, all we had was T.V. the telephone, and maybe dial-up internet. So we all had much more in common. Now, I could spend 10 years, watching and reading things on the internet, nobody would have any connection to at all, by having shared those experiences with me.

If I were to watch, "The Twilight Zone," in it's entirety, there are very few people, at all, much less in my near vicinity, that will be able to relate with me.

What you describe to me, sounds a bit like an experience I had long ago. It was a strange experience. I knew everything that was going to happen before it happened. There was nothing new. I knew X person would say X, and I'd respond in a predictable particular way. It went on for about 3 months that way. I think it ended, when I had this realization of some kind, about the point of all this, the everything, being to share in experiencing one another.

So, yeah, I think we can get into strange mental territory, where everything feels a bit of an echoless, empty void...

But, in my experience, everything is transitory, ephemeral, and temporary; even if those states tend to last for a long time, some times...

Internet conversation has had meaning for me, at different times over the years. The sad thing about it though, is the often temporary and ephemeral nature of it. You could share yourself, on a very intimate level with some one, who lives thousands of miles away, never meet them, and eventually move on from each other, without ever having any clue as to a great many details about their lived life, and where it went after you both parted... But, the same can happen to people we know in person as well, over time...

*shrugs* I dunno.

 

[user 188522]

I don't think anything in particular, including socializing has to have, 'value.' The stars and the moon don't have value. Maybe some day some one will think of a way that the moon can have value; but, it's just the moon.

I don't think we have to live in a Universe of value, and purpose, and all that. We can value certain things, sure. I value manners, thoughtfulness, consideration, caring, understanding, compassion, and such; but, that just describes my feelings on such matters, or my inclinations...

I've known people, myself included, that go through extremely long bouts of social isolation, while pretty much carrying on with the same routine. It used to be that, back in the day, all we had was T.V. the telephone, and maybe dial-up internet. So we all had much more in common. Now, I could spend 10 years, watching and reading things on the internet, nobody would have any connection to at all, by having shared those experiences with me.

If I were to watch, "The Twilight Zone," in it's entirety, there are very few people, at all, much less in my near vicinity, that will be able to relate with me.

What you describe to me, sounds a bit like an experience I had long ago. It was a strange experience. I knew everything that was going to happen before it happened. There was nothing new. I knew X person would say X, and I'd respond in a predictable particular way. It went on for about 3 months that way. I think it ended, when I had this realization of some kind, about the point of all this, the everything, being to share in experiencing one another.

So, yeah, I think we can get into strange mental territory, where everything feels a bit of an echoless, empty void...

But, in my experience, everything is transitory, ephemeral, and temporary; even if those states tend to last for a long time, some times...

Internet conversation has had meaning for me, at different times over the years. The sad thing about it though, is the often temporary and ephemeral nature of it. You could share yourself, on a very intimate level with some one, who lives thousands of miles away, never meet them, and eventually move on from each other, without ever having any clue as to a great many details about their lived life, and where it went after you both parted... But, the same can happen to people we know in person as well, over time...

*shrugs* I dunno.

Writing and reading here help with my loneliness. A person try it more often, it might help.

 

[Butterfly 2]

I'ts hard for me even to get myself to writing this here, it seems pointless, communication is something that I find harder as I get older. What is worth saying? I feel like nothing is, not even this, but I have to write something. Well, I don't have to, I don't have to write, or say or do anything, I don't even have to live, but I'm not dying anytime soon, and I wish I wasn't alone, and communicating with other people makes me feel less lonely, but is very hard, mainly because I feel there is nothing worth saying and I can't find value in it. I know it doesn't matter the topic (or I think so), two people chatting about the weather or meaningless gossip can be as productive as two people sharing ideas on life or philosophy, in the end the topic is just a medium, or an excuse. That's the way I see it. And I feel like I've already said so much, but I'm still alone, so it's hard for me to find it useful. Does that make sense to you? Or do you value a conversation even if nothing else came from it? I'm talking mainly about chatting with stranger on the internet, not friends or acquaintances.

Welcome to the forum!

Having conversations can definitely cause tension or get you in trouble if they go down the wrong path. But yes, I don't feel as alone and I feel more supported and happier even if it is just a brief and casual conversation with someone. For me, it sometimes means more if it is actually in person, but I can also feel comforted by exchanging ideas online on a forum like this.

 

[Bam111]

I'ts hard for me even to get myself to writing this here, it seems pointless, communication is something that I find harder as I get older. What is worth saying? I feel like nothing is, not even this, but I have to write something. Well, I don't have to, I don't have to write, or say or do anything, I don't even have to live, but I'm not dying anytime soon, and I wish I wasn't alone, and communicating with other people makes me feel less lonely, but is very hard, mainly because I feel there is nothing worth saying and I can't find value in it. I know it doesn't matter the topic (or I think so), two people chatting about the weather or meaningless gossip can be as productive as two people sharing ideas on life or philosophy, in the end the topic is just a medium, or an excuse. That's the way I see it. And I feel like I've already said so much, but I'm still alone, so it's hard for me to find it useful. Does that make sense to you? Or do you value a conversation even if nothing else came from it? I'm talking mainly about chatting with stranger on the internet, not friends or acquaintances.

Were to begin:

A person: I'ts hard for me even to get myself to writing this here, it seems pointless, communication is something that I find harder as I get older. What is worth saying? I feel like nothing is, not even this, but I have to write something.

Response: You must have had it ruff to communicate with others growing up, from what I can't deduce from your post. I never was able to fit in a child I was never given the chance to my mother used to lock me up in my room and if she didn't do this she was beating the **** out of me one way or another it made me awkward growing up I had no friends no immediate family I could depend on to save me from her she was a great manipulator (don't get me wrong we reconciled later) but also I have a mental condition maybe if you send me a private message you can share up to you I always am here to listen. But again, you don't have to.

A person: but I'm not dying anytime soon, and I wish I wasn't alone, and communicating with other people makes me feel less lonely, but is very hard, mainly because I feel there is nothing worth saying and I can't find value in it. I know it doesn't matter the topic (or I think so), two people chatting about the weather or meaningless gossip can be as productive as two people sharing ideas on life or philosophy, in the end the topic is just a medium, or an excuse.

Response: Well at least you are fighting and not giving up you are here that's the important part, I wish I wasn't alone to I try to surround myself with others I crave conversation I care about others even though they don't care about me it's something I always felt was a weakness in me (not too much anymore.) At least you had immediate friends though that's good I didn't have anyone but my sister my brother and myself, and conversation can be productive btw just have to find the right person and not talk about things that are more meaningful to your situation I suppose.

A person: That's the way I see it. And I feel like I've already said so much, but I'm still alone, so it's hard for me to find it useful. Does that make sense to you? Or do you value a conversation even if nothing else came from it? I'm talking mainly about chatting with stranger on the internet, not friends or acquaintances.

Response: Somewhat makes sense maybe you can explain it more to me I do value others feedback I promise you I will listen. Me myself personally now (I value everyone's feedback) maybe its because of isolation that I had that I value what others say (does that mean they are right all the time, no) but I am able to evaluate that myself later I learn from everyone and I have more of a (you stop learning only in death attitude, but even this doesn't describe me cause I feel that you can also learn when you die because I was pronounced dead by a doctor before and I learn something way different from that changed my life.)

If you wish to talk though like I said I am always here for people, I value everyone I understand you (not completely because no one can) but I can listen and converse the choice is yours. Have a wonderful day hang in there.

 

[a person]

Tropical starfish, in this post I'm talking about the value in a subjective way, not inherent value. Socializing definitely has value for us, we are social beings, and chatting is a way to socialize and get to know someone. But I feel like I haven't gotten that from it, since I'm still alone, so it's hard to find value in it for me, and is hard for me to get myself to do it. I find it hard to get me to chat with someone, ask about them, what they like, share what I like and other stuff, etc etc, and in the end I'm still alone. So the effort I put in that conversation didn't produce anything of value for me. Sure, it's a minimal effort, is not that hard to speak, or move my fingers (when typing) but I'm talking about years of doing it. I've also been active in lots of forums before and used to like it. But now it feels hard for me.

Bam111 I've always been bad at making friends or meeting people. And I used to be very shy too. Now I don't feel like a shy person, I can easily speak with anyone if I have something to say, and if not, at least I don't feel awkward in silence. I don't mean it's hard as in "I don't know how to express myself" but in "I see no point in it"

Response: Somewhat makes sense maybe you can explain it more to me I do value others feedback I promise you I will listen.

I will give a more detailed and specific explanation of what I meant.

-Im a lonely person, I don't have friends or anyone to talk with.
-I go on the internet looking for social interactions, I start getting into forums and chats
-I like it, I get to interact with other people, share ideas and other stuff, debate, etc.
-I even start finding people "like me" (lonely), I share how I feel and my situation.
-I get lots of "I understand you, I'm the same way" type of responses, it makes me feel less lonely.
-Eventually for one reason or another, we stop communication (example of reasons: I get bored of people, they get bored of me, I don't feel any real connection, we just dont have anything more to talk about, for some reason we argue and stop talking to each other).
-I'm still lonely and have no-one to talk with so keep doing it.

And that for about ten years, and now I'm tired. And just that, I can open myself to people, I know how to do that, and I'm not hurt, or traumatized, I'm just tired.

 

[user 188685]

I find it very meaningful to talk to people,espically on here,on this forum site you can talk to people on here and they know exactly how you feel,because they know what it is like to be alone,on here,you are not alone,there is a lot of really great people on here you can talk to at anytime.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

I was just going to say something along the lines of, "Just because you don't find your rose bush beautiful and delightfully pleasing to the eyes, any longer, doesn't mean you should tear it from the ground, or stop watering it..."

 

[Bam111]

Tropical starfish, in this post I'm talking about the value in a subjective way, not inherent value. Socializing definitely has value for us, we are social beings, and chatting is a way to socialize and get to know someone. But I feel like I haven't gotten that from it, since I'm still alone, so it's hard to find value in it for me, and is hard for me to get myself to do it. I find it hard to get me to chat with someone, ask about them, what they like, share what I like and other stuff, etc etc, and in the end I'm still alone. So the effort I put in that conversation didn't produce anything of value for me. Sure, it's a minimal effort, is not that hard to speak, or move my fingers (when typing) but I'm talking about years of doing it. I've also been active in lots of forums before and used to like it. But now it feels hard for me.

Bam111 I've always been bad at making friends or meeting people. And I used to be very shy too. Now I don't feel like a shy person, I can easily speak with anyone if I have something to say, and if not, at least I don't feel awkward in silence. I don't mean it's hard as in "I don't know how to express myself" but in "I see no point in it"



I will give a more detailed and specific explanation of what I meant.

-Im a lonely person, I don't have friends or anyone to talk with.
-I go on the internet looking for social interactions, I start getting into forums and chats
-I like it, I get to interact with other people, share ideas and other stuff, debate, etc.
-I even start finding people "like me" (lonely), I share how I feel and my situation.
-I get lots of "I understand you, I'm the same way" type of responses, it makes me feel less lonely.
-Eventually for one reason or another, we stop communication (example of reasons: I get bored of people, they get bored of me, I don't feel any real connection, we just dont have anything more to talk about, for some reason we argue and stop talking to each other).
-I'm still lonely and have no-one to talk with so keep doing it.

And that for about ten years, and now I'm tired. And just that, I can open myself to people, I know how to do that, and I'm not hurt, or traumatized, I'm just tired.

Thank you for giving me a more detailed explanation now we can understand more about what you are meaning and how to better open the gate of communication to one another (if that's what you truly wish to do, if not no hard feelings.)

So, then I am sorry for this process but it's the only way I know how to operate my thoughts in an order in which is understandable to others by answering portions one by one.

-Im a lonely person, I don't have friends or anyone to talk with.
1. Do you wish to talk? I will listen to you genuinely, just I am a bit busy as of late can't promise it's going to be an instant message If you want to talk you can reach out to me via private message or here or If you wish to talk on a platform like (Discord for example) this option is the better one for me since it gives notification to me like popups which will be more likely for me to see when you post.

-I go on the internet looking for social interactions, I start getting into forums and chats
2. sorry if I haven't noticed this I will try and look on your thread I get consumed with research and work that sometimes I only interact with the person above or below me and not the entire thread chat.

-I like it, I get to interact with other people, share ideas and other stuff, debate, etc.
3. It is a good way to interact with others usually I just join someone else's thread to interact since most of my threads are very detailed and lengthy, I feel not many people enjoy that about my threads, so I am working hard to figure out how to connect but it feels like a losing battle sometimes, and others I just don't bother and amerce myself back into my research.

-I even start finding people "like me" (lonely), I share how I feel and my situation.
4, That's good are you getting any feedback from these people? For me it's about 50/50 I don't really take it personally just try to understand how I can better communicate my interest to others is genuine for some it's hard to believe I am interested though I show it (I feel like I do anyway.)

-I get lots of "I understand you, I'm the same way" type of responses, it makes me feel less lonely.
5. Thats good that it makes you feel that way, I kind of relate and I kind of don't the emotional side of me relates to this wanting someone else to understand my emotions. Then there's the Analytical side of me that feels that it wants more feedback than the simple acknowledgement of (I feel you, I relate to you, I understand you) If you do these things to this side of me it wants to know how and why you feel this way if that makes any sense.

-Eventually for one reason or another, we stop communication (example of reasons: I get bored of people, they get bored of me, I don't feel any real connection, we just don't have anything more to talk about, for some reason we argue and stop talking to each other).
6. Maybe it's for the same reason I said above maybe you feel that same way, you want the feedback and you're not getting it from that person, it sometimes becomes one sided and you regress or withdraw from them because you do not feel like you are getting anything out of the relationship (not saying that's how I feel when my analytical side takes over) for me I think everyone has something they can teach we are all masters at something whether it's something useful or useless is up to the beholder the one seeking the interaction.

-I'm still lonely and have no-one to talk with so keep doing it.
7. I see nothing wrong with this you seek companionship and to connect it's a good thing if you were not interested in seeking companionship why would you be here?

And that for about ten years, and now I'm tired. And just that, I can open myself to people, I know how to do that, and I'm not hurt, or traumatized, I'm just tired.
Lastly- I understand this feeling I have been seeking companions ship for 30 years mostly all my life I could not obtain it for one reason or another the only friend I had was my little brother who was like a son to me and for me that was enough, then he passed away 4 years ago, and I fell apart and had to rebuild myself and put myself back together (this isn't about me though I am just trying to show you a little of my understanding into your perspective of tired.)

Well anyways I always give such long speeches now you shared with me, I shared with you, I give you the choice: it's up to you if you wish to walk through that door I offer you my friendship, you can choose to accept or decline (no hard feelings taken.) if it is healthy for you in the long run keep it, if it is not you can walk away. Have a wonderful day take care.

 

[Claudia1794]

Hello person, so up until about 2 months ago I was basically in the same mindset. What's the point? I have noticed a slight shift in that since I've been on this forum but its mainly due to one person that I talk to regularly and privately. I do enjoy reading and responding to the different topics. But my goal was to see if I could find 'value' in what another person said and felt. This started out as an experiment type thing. I was curious if I could even connect with someone since it has been so long for me. Here's the thing though, I've never talked to anyone on the internet, no social media, hell I only use the internet to buy books and occasionally stream a show or movie. This may very well end up like what you were describing, useless, but for the moment it has been a useful and successful experiment.

 

[a person]

Bam111, it seems that it wasn't clear that that list of events was sort of a sequence and a cycle. Because you seem to have taken each by itself and give it its own reply. For example

-I'm still lonely and have no-one to talk with so keep doing it.
7. I see nothing wrong with this you seek companionship and to connect it's a good thing if you were not interested in seeking companionship why would you be here?

Yea, there is nothing wrong with it, I'm just pointing out that after some time of having people to chat with and feeling less lonely, I was still lonely, or lonely again, maybe I should have said again instead of still.

-Eventually for one reason or another, we stop communication (example of reasons: I get bored of people, they get bored of me, I don't feel any real connection, we just don't have anything more to talk about, for some reason we argue and stop talking to each other).
6. Maybe it's for the same reason I said above maybe you feel that same way, you want the feedback and you're not getting it from that person, it sometimes becomes one sided and you regress or withdraw from them because you do not feel like you are getting anything out of the relationship (not saying that's how I feel when my analytical side takes over) for me I think everyone has something they can teach we are all masters at something whether it's something useful or useless is up to the beholder the one seeking the interaction.

As it is something that has been happening for some years and with many people, I said for one reason or another, I think the reasons could be a separate topic, because each person is its own world, so each interaction is different too. The one you said probably has been a reason why I stopped talking to some people, but also the ones I mentioned, that's why I only said "example of reasons".

Sorry about your brother, I really don't know what it's like to lose a loved one. Glad you put yourself back together.

 

[Bam111]

Bam111, it seems that it wasn't clear that that list of events was sort of a sequence and a cycle. Because you seem to have taken each by itself and give it its own reply. For example


Yea, there is nothing wrong with it, I'm just pointing out that after some time of having people to chat with and feeling less lonely, I was still lonely, or lonely again, maybe I should have said again instead of still.


As it is something that has been happening for some years and with many people, I said for one reason or another, I think the reasons could be a separate topic, because each person is its own world, so each interaction is different too. The one you said probably has been a reason why I stopped talking to some people, but also the ones I mentioned, that's why I only said "example of reasons".

Sorry about your brother, I really don't know what it's like to lose a loved one. Glad you put yourself back together.

thanks, well I won't hijack your thread after this I will allow others to talk to you because yes, it is important to get feedback and everyone's world is different for better or worse I already think I covered some of the things I felt. So have a wonderful day and keep posting (if you like) don't stop trying unless that's what you feel is best for you my offer still stands (no hard feelings if not, take care.)

 

[Sfgiantslover]

I'ts hard for me even to get myself to writing this here, it seems pointless, communication is something that I find harder as I get older. What is worth saying? I feel like nothing is, not even this, but I have to write something. Well, I don't have to, I don't have to write, or say or do anything, I don't even have to live, but I'm not dying anytime soon, and I wish I wasn't alone, and communicating with other people makes me feel less lonely, but is very hard, mainly because I feel there is nothing worth saying and I can't find value in it. I know it doesn't matter the topic (or I think so), two people chatting about the weather or meaningless gossip can be as productive as two people sharing ideas on life or philosophy, in the end the topic is just a medium, or an excuse. That's the way I see it. And I feel like I've already said so much, but I'm still alone, so it's hard for me to find it useful. Does that make sense to you? Or do you value a conversation even if nothing else came from it? I'm talking mainly about chatting with stranger on the internet, not friends or acquaintances.

Having a conversation really helps me.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Actually, yeah.
The older that I get the more a regular conversation either online or offline becomes something I value.
Because I've learned A LOT of stuff just from talking to people and making small notes out of some of the stuff that they say so I can go do my own R&D later and get a bit experimental with some of my own ideas.

Trinkets and gadgets kinda wane over time to me.
I think that's because of cost, but also because of the redundancy factor beyond what I find to be satisfactory for me.
For example, phones.
While I can't knock the idea of a quad camera phone because certainly some people do need a quad camera phone, I have absolutely no use for it. Best use I could think of is, idk, a panorama of something in the forest, I guess.
Or gaming, I don't need the highest graphics, I'm good with that now.
Same with cars. Luxury cars are pretty, the science is interesting, but I'm cool with like a Honda Civic, I don't need all that excess for no real reason.

I feel like the older that I get the more I have to prepare to have absolutely no help whatsoever, which is one of the few things that genuinely terrifies me. So because of that, I've learned to find meaning and value in every casual conversation I have. Plus it, actually kind of makes my day better.

 

[KimP]

Do what makes you happy and healthy. In my case I find myself stuck with a very select few people to converse with IRL, so chatting online gives me new insight and perspectives. On the flip side, sometimes I’ve found chatting online can cause me anxiety if things are contentious or intense, but at least it’s easier to avoid these things online than it is IRL

 

[charlotte craig]

I prefer private 1 2 1 chats. Anyone is welcome to private message me and see how it goes.

 

[charlotte craig]

I don't think anything in particular, including socializing has to have, 'value.' The stars and the moon don't have value. Maybe some day some one will think of a way that the moon can have value; but, it's just the moon.

I don't think we have to live in a Universe of value, and purpose, and all that. We can value certain things, sure. I value manners, thoughtfulness, consideration, caring, understanding, compassion, and such; but, that just describes my feelings on such matters, or my inclinations...

I've known people, myself included, that go through extremely long bouts of social isolation, while pretty much carrying on with the same routine. It used to be that, back in the day, all we had was T.V. the telephone, and maybe dial-up internet. So we all had much more in common. Now, I could spend 10 years, watching and reading things on the internet, nobody would have any connection to at all, by having shared those experiences with me.

If I were to watch, "The Twilight Zone," in it's entirety, there are very few people, at all, much less in my near vicinity, that will be able to relate with me.

What you describe to me, sounds a bit like an experience I had long ago. It was a strange experience. I knew everything that was going to happen before it happened. There was nothing new. I knew X person would say X, and I'd respond in a predictable particular way. It went on for about 3 months that way. I think it ended, when I had this realization of some kind, about the point of all this, the everything, being to share in experiencing one another.

So, yeah, I think we can get into strange mental territory, where everything feels a bit of an echoless, empty void...

But, in my experience, everything is transitory, ephemeral, and temporary; even if those states tend to last for a long time, some times...

Internet conversation has had meaning for me, at different times over the years. The sad thing about it though, is the often temporary and ephemeral nature of it. You could share yourself, on a very intimate level with some one, who lives thousands of miles away, never meet them, and eventually move on from each other, without ever having any clue as to a great many details about their lived life, and where it went after you both parted... But, the same can happen to people we know in person as well, over time...

*shrugs* I dunno.

I think a lot of people who are happy to share intimate details for ages with a total stranger online do it for their own benefit - to fill an empty day - kill time - be heard and listened to - get sympathy or whatever. That in itself is valuable. But it soon passes. They also forget that the other person could be lying about who and what they are or what they are after. They never really know this other person at all, only what they choose to tell them.
Different people look for different things, depending on what is missing from their lives already. Some want it all to come from the other person and cannot offer anything worth having in return. Eventually it all evens out only to start all over again.

I once had a very old man who was disabled and in a wheelchair, stuck at home alone a lot, message me nagging me to chat to him all day every day! He assumed everyone else online had no life and nothing else to do, and he would become their number one priority if it suited him. He only wanted to chat to younger women so he had high hopes. In the end he chatted to someone who claimed to be a young, gorgeous woman. It turned out this was a man who he was sending money to. Because, of course, no young vital woman of 20ish would spend all day every day chatting to an old man. Was she supposed to give up her studies, job, getting an income, going out, having fun, having a boyfriend? He expected her to. Totally unrealistic and very selfish.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

I think a lot of people who are happy to share intimate details for ages with a total stranger online do it for their own benefit - to fill an empty day - kill time - be heard and listened to - get sympathy or whatever. That in itself is valuable. But it soon passes. They also forget that the other person could be lying about who and what they are or what they are after. They never really know this other person at all, only what they choose to tell them.
Different people look for different things, depending on what is missing from their lives already. Some want it all to come from the other person and cannot offer anything worth having in return. Eventually it all evens out only to start all over again.

I once had a very old man who was disabled and in a wheelchair, stuck at home alone a lot, message me nagging me to chat to him all day every day! He assumed everyone else online had no life and nothing else to do, and he would become their number one priority if it suited him. He only wanted to chat to younger women so he had high hopes. In the end he chatted to someone who claimed to be a young, gorgeous woman. It turned out this was a man who he was sending money to. Because, of course, no young vital woman of 20ish would spend all day every day chatting to an old man. Was she supposed to give up her studies, job, getting an income, going out, having fun, having a boyfriend? He expected her to. Totally unrealistic and very selfish.

I don't see what my post has anything to do with what seems to be a common theme of yours, that: people are selfish, have ulterior motives, and are not to be trusted.

I don't particularly care to live in a world, where, everyone except me and perhaps people I care about, are selfish, ulterior motive driven peach pickers, who aren't to be trusted.

Maybe that's the world you live in, and if that's your experience, that's too bad. I prefer not to dwell on the ugliness of life too much. Yes, it sure is ugly sometimes, and so are the people, sometimes. But, not always.

I really don't see why you have to reply to my post, with yet another story about how people are selfish, stupid, and have ulterior motives.

I don't really need the reminder, I am aware, thank-you though.

Anyone who thinks there arsehole doesn't stink, is probably misinformed; and it's enough trouble for me to look after my own arse, thank-you.

The world is what we make of it. And if that's an ideal, in a world ruled by practicality; then how practical is practicality really?

--My response to the OP is below, and back several posts, for context--
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and by the by, IF conversation is to matter, context is usually an important contributing factor.
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I don't think anything in particular, including socializing has to have, 'value.' The stars and the moon don't have value. Maybe some day some one will think of a way that the moon can have value; but, it's just the moon.
I don't think we have to live in a Universe of value, and purpose, and all that. We can value certain things, sure. I value manners, thoughtfulness, consideration, caring, understanding, compassion, and such; but, that just describes my feelings on such matters, or my inclinations...
I've known people, myself included, that go through extremely long bouts of social isolation, while pretty much carrying on with the same routine. It used to be that, back in the day, all we had was T.V. the telephone, and maybe dial-up internet. So we all had much more in common. Now, I could spend 10 years, watching and reading things on the internet, nobody would have any connection to at all, by having shared those experiences with me.
If I were to watch, "The Twilight Zone," in it's entirety, there are very few people, at all, much less in my near vicinity, that will be able to relate with me.
What you describe to me, sounds a bit like an experience I had long ago. It was a strange experience. I knew everything that was going to happen before it happened. There was nothing new. I knew X person would say X, and I'd respond in a predictable particular way. It went on for about 3 months that way. I think it ended, when I had this realization of some kind, about the point of all this, the everything, being to share in experiencing one another.
So, yeah, I think we can get into strange mental territory, where everything feels a bit of an echoless, empty void...
But, in my experience, everything is transitory, ephemeral, and temporary; even if those states tend to last for a long time, some times...
Internet conversation has had meaning for me, at different times over the years. The sad thing about it though, is the often temporary and ephemeral nature of it. You could share yourself, on a very intimate level with some one, who lives thousands of miles away, never meet them, and eventually move on from each other, without ever having any clue as to a great many details about their lived life, and where it went after you both parted... But, the same can happen to people we know in person as well, over time...
*shrugs* I dunno.
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[TheRealCallie]

Sometimes people stuck in their homes just want someone to talk to. That's not selfish, that's HUMAN.

 

[TheRealCallie]

But to answer the original question.....if a conversation helps someone, even just as a "someone noticed me" kind of thing, it has value. Doesn't matter what the topic is, it only matters what you (or someone else) gets from it. Everything has value if you let it.