Failing To Meet Goals

[AFrozenSoul]

Funny how failure to meet a goal can throw you into depression. Especially when it is not like I have not accomplished anything. My goal was simple. A year ago I decided to get think. Now a year later I am still fat. I define fat as having a gut. Do not get me wrong I am nearly 30 lbs lighter. Yet my goal of being slim is not met.

I wonder... what can I do to keep my chin up. Telling myself sometimes things take longer is not working. I have been at this for a year. Telling myself I have made an accomplishment is not working.

Why is it that time magnifies my failure. Right now it is ruining everything I have worked for... I do not know... my mind is a clutter with stress... how do I rebuild my self-esteem so I can keep trying to better myself?

 

[Bread]

Sometimes we just can't meet our lofty goals. It's important to keep on trying, regardless of occasional backtracking and setbacks. You still have time, barring some odd and untimely death.

You did good progress- you just require a tad more of psyching yourself into the right state of mind, get out of the rut of procrastination and increase the tenacity of your training- train one more time a week, go for spontaneous bike or walking treks, anything that involves moving out and about.

Not much good at pep talks, myself, but I usually try and think of the two paths- trying and failure. On the other hand, we got varying chances of meeting our set goals, on the other, zero chance of achieving anything but an forgettable, shorter life.

You can also try to build up your confidence by setting smaller goals rather than long-term achievements, and meeting those small goals will bolster your sense of self-worth.

 

[I'm Fine]

I remember reading somewhere that it should take as long to lose the weight as it did to put on if it's to be effective. So, I guess, 30lbs in a year is about right. Maybe you should alter your perspective. Instead of aiming to reach a certain weight/thinness by a certain date - just aim to reach it and, as long as you're travelling in the right direction, you're doing fine.

Good luck *hugs*

 

[SophiaGrace]

you haven't failed, you're working towards meeting your goal and have made some progress.

Look at my thread here: http://alonelylife.com/showthread.php?tid=14317&page=1

Every day I post something I did to try and meet this over-all larger goal. I'm doing it in tiny little bites and someday I'll be done.

 

[Spare]

Everyone loses weight at different paces. The best I was ever able to do was 50 pounds in a year, and that's only because I had a psychopathic gym friend who was working out with me.

30 pounds in a year is very healthy weight loss, and when you lose weight in a healthy manner, it is more difficult to put it back on again. So you should try to focus on being proud of your accomplishment, because that's what it really is.

Congratulations on your weight loss success! Keep it up!

 

[Mooosic]

It's better to try and fail than to never try at all (I read this somewhere)!!! Your motivation should be... just think about how happy you'll be! And hey if you can't lose that gut then oh well! You never know...someone could be falling in love with it.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

@Mooosic: Yeah I have learned that I would rather try and fail over never trying at all. :| as for my gut... well... nevermind... I do not want to start trouble. I am definitely trying to think about how happy I will be... however... like I said I have been thinking that way for a year now... it gets harder the more time progresses.

@SophiaGrace: Hmmm I did not know we could do stuff like that hear. Maybe I will start up a thread of my own. I am doing my best to avoid a "Finish someday" attitude. Because the last time I did that I never finished and actually sort of stopped. I guess I need to put more effort into documenting my progress... there are just so few hours in the day.

@Bread: I have already trimmed down my goals... I do not know... like I said I am a year into this... I know I only have myself to blame.

I am definitly on the kick of trying over not doing anything. I am watching doing nothing slowly rot my roommate away.

@Spare: Yeah, I am trying to get back on the track of losing 2 lbs a week. Most everywhere I do research says that is the fastest you should lose weight.

I have a psychopathic gym partner. He is called my personal trainer... just I won't be able to afford him after July. I am definitely running out of weight to lose though. I am just being vain...

 

[Ivy]

Though it may not be of much help, I thought I'd offer what advice I could give.

It helps if you can find a friend, at least one good friend. they will give you confidence, support you, cheer you up. When you think "what's the point, honestly?", they'll give you plenty of points.
Even if its a dog, you can still snuggle when your down, that big happy fellow will always have your back. At least once hes house broken(o.0 lol)

Also, working out could help. Find a good program, fit it to your schedule, and just do it! Tell yourself you have to, make it a life or death thing in your mind so your body will follow through. And while your running, or whatever the workout is, just keep telling yourself your almost done. I'm almost there, just a few more minutes. I call it gut-push. Never give up and just keep goen!

 

[IgnoredOne]

For what it is worth: be careful of subjective goals like "lose my gut." Always use specific goals with numbers so you know how far you're getting and at what pace you are progressing. If you sought to lose 40 pds, for example, and lost 30, then you know that you are 75% to the way.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Slogons or saying from support group.
"Progress not perfections"

"dont leave 5 mins before the miracle happens"
This statement helps people to not give up...becuase success
is just right around the conner.

Be your own best friend or life coach...
What would you tell someone else that had accomplished a task or
havn't entirely met thier goals?.
You would give them all kinds of good advice...no?
Motivate ourself, courage yourself.

A reward system...reward yourself, praise yourself for losing the 30lb.
We all reponse better to rewards and praise.
This is the mechanics of being self supporting or happiness is an
inside job. Praising ourselve, rewarding ourselves, movitating ourselves. We becomess less and less dependent on others.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

@Ivy: ^_^ Well I have my kitty... >_> She is sitting on my legs and giving me cramps. ^_^ but she is my buddy. She is always sitting on my lap and legs... my face.... and attacking my couch <_<.... hiding from me when I give her meds.... ^_^ but she is my buddy.

I have also been working with a personal trainer for the past year. Do not get me wrong working out makes me feel a lot better when it is over. I think one of my problems is I am not tracking my progress... my trainer has been doing an average job of that.

@IgnoredOne: True, but my gut is something I can see though. However, I know what you mean. I am definitely trying to put more effort into tracking weight. My most recent goal for my last personal training sessions is to lose 20 lbs. 2 lbs a week.

@Lonesome Crow: Hmmm yeah... rewarding myself... >_> I have no money to do that.... stupid personal training broke me.... but I know what you mean. I am trying to believe that the weight loss and becoming sexier is its own reward.... <_< Maybe I need more intermittent rewards.

 

[Ivy]

thats good. I have a cat too, love him to death, even if he is a brat cat. ^.^

 

[AFrozenSoul]

thats good. I have a cat too, love him to death, even if he is a brat cat. ^.^

>_> yup my kitty is a brat too... she refuses to drink water from her bowl. But she is amusing me.. being freaked out by being in the new apartment.

 

[Ivy]

lol, thats always fun. Mine is terrified to death of storms. He huddles in the corner all fluffed up. I feel bad for him! 0.0

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Aww.... my kitty is freaked out by new people. I mean I am shy, but she takes it to a NEW level. If she so much as hears an unfamiliar voice she runs away to one of her hiding places. Right now her favorite is in my closet.

 

[laaal]

Don't lose your heart if you could't chase your target and goal..
try try try and try to chase your target..

 

[AFrozenSoul]

@laaal I know it is just hard not to lose heart after such a long period of time.

 

[laaal]

Don't lose your heart if you could't chase your target and goal..
try try try and try to chase your target..

Thanks for comment..
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