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lonelypanda said:
BeyondShy said:
After I read this I stopped reading.

That was a good idea. Readings not your thing.

Reading is not my thing? And how the hell would you know? You don't know a damned thing about me.
 
BeyondShy said:
lonelypanda said:
BeyondShy said:
After I read this I stopped reading.

That was a good idea. Readings not your thing.

Reading is not my thing? And how the hell would you know? You don't know a damned thing about me.

Heh, what you post tells me a little about you. You're sarcastic and you assume.
 
I'm done arguing with people like you. You ******* just got here and you are on my case already. ********. I don't need this!!
 
Triple Bogey said:
I don't really hear women going on about a man's personality much. . I see plenty of good looking people who have zero personality walking around with somebody on their arm.

I know a lot of women that talk about personalities.
How exactly do you know these guys have no personalty?

Solivagant said:
BeyondShy said:
It depends on the person and not the sex.

^ Yes.

I also agree with this, it's true for everything.
 
lonelypanda said:
BeyondShy said:
lonelypanda said:
BeyondShy said:
After I read this I stopped reading.

That was a good idea. Readings not your thing.

Reading is not my thing? And how the hell would you know? You don't know a damned thing about me.

Heh, what you post tells me a little about you. You're sarcastic and you assume.

I like your posts in this thread. Good work.

BeyondSays said:
I'm done arguing with people like you. You ******* just got here and you are on my case already. ********. I don't need this!!

lonelypanda didn't need your sarcastic responses, yet you couldn't resist mouthing off. Now what could we have done to prevent this? Take all the time you need in figuring it out.
 
ladyforsaken said:
Please, if anyone has issues or concerns to raise about the moderation on the forum can you please open a new discussion thread...

This isn't a bad idea, ladyforsaken, but would people actually be willing to discuss the issue rationally? Lest we forget, the last thread on the current state of the forum went down in flames.
 
BeyondShy said:
I'm done arguing with people like you. You ******* just got here and you are on my case already. ********. I don't need this!!

You wanna run that by me again ? Haha I'm pretty sure you quoted me first.


reynard_muldrake said:
I like your posts in this thread. Good work.

Thank you :D
 
I'll tell you all once, reynard_muldrake, lonelypanda, and BeyondShy. End it. The next person to continue gets a ban.
 
Solivagant said:
BeyondShy said:
It depends on the person and not the sex.

^ Yes.

I gotta agree with this. We can't surely say that men or women are mostly shallow. It really depends on personality.. I don't even think men and women are "equally shallow" cos who can really know that?

lifestream said:
ladyforsaken said:
Please, if anyone has issues or concerns to raise about the moderation on the forum can you please open a new discussion thread...

This isn't a bad idea, ladyforsaken, but would people actually be willing to discuss the issue rationally? Lest we forget, the last thread on the current state of the forum went down in flames.

I did think of that. But I think if people are able to discuss like adults and not start getting defensive at every point stated so that the discussion can continue in a civilised manner, it can happen. Unfortunately, people can be very sensitive beings who jump on every point stated that might offend them and use that against everyone who opposes their opinion or idea, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, on topic, I think what ardour initially suggested about how TB can improve his appearance makes a lot of sense in some parts. I can totally understand the hesitance in putting on wigs because when I was at my treatment center, I saw a few patients there who had wigs on and I don't know, I thought it was quite obvious and only drew more attention than not unless they find a way to make it look more naturally flowy or something like this. It would look more normal for TB to put on a nice hat so I think TB should consider that.
 
Hats are always good. All different styles and whatnot to pick from, too.
 
I think TB would find much more acceptance from wearing a hat than a wig. I feel people would criticize the wig much more, and actually be more receptive to his wearing a hat, especially if it's a nice one that compliments him. I've never really been a hat guy myself except in winter, I wear winter hats. But I don't know about much else to give him advice on it. I just think that if it's between a hat or a wig, I would guess that a hat would be the better option.
 
TheSkaFish said:
I think TB would find much more acceptance from wearing a hat than a wig. I feel people would criticize the wig much more, and actually be more receptive to his wearing a hat, especially if it's a nice one that compliments him. I've never really been a hat guy myself except in winter, I wear winter hats. But I don't know about much else to give him advice on it. I just think that if it's between a hat or a wig, I would guess that a hat would be the better option.

I can see what you mean with people criticising those who wear wigs. But in a way, I feel like some people think it's the lesser of the two evils, between wearing a wig and not wearing a wig, showing off their shaven head or a hat that still doesn't exactly hide their shaven head (even if a fully bald person wears a hat, you can still pretty much tell they're fully bald). I could understand these people though... they wear wigs for a lot of reasons and not many can accept how they look due to whatever the circumstances. I never told anyone this but a few people close to me, but I had a hard time when I had to shave my head off because of what chemo was doing to me. I've always had long, waist-length hair and the first day I decided to shave my head, I cried. As much as I don't care for appearance in anyone, it's still hard to be viewed as "damaged" or something like that. I still had a hard time going out with a scarf on, on top of the little beanie type of hat and I always thought it looked awful on me. No matter how much I covered up, it was still pretty obvious in the day light.

So in a way I can understand what TB might feel, with or without a hat, with or without a wig, people are bound to criticise anyway cos he doesn't look "normal" to what society prefers. So what can you do? What did I do? I lived with it. There comes a point in time when you just realise it's not worth your time and energy worrying about what people might think of your appearance. I tried to be happy with how I look no matter how hard it was.. I think the most important thing is to realise that people will always be mean about it (I even had strangers tell me I was ugly), so I might as well live contentedly with my appearance the best way I can. If I'm not kind to myself, who can be?

Believe it or not, that doesn't mean it's all good. I still have issues with how I look. I still shy away from strangers who come knocking at the door... I still cover my head when we get visitors. You just have to learn to live with it... or work around it.

And I'm glad TB is still trying to improve his appearance to feel better about himself. I hope you'll find some peace with your appearance, TB. Good luck.
 
ladyforsaken said:
I did think of that. But I think if people are able to discuss like adults and not start getting defensive at every point stated so that the discussion can continue in a civilised manner, it can happen. Unfortunately, people can be very sensitive beings who jump on every point stated that might offend them and use that against everyone who opposes their opinion or idea, if you know what I mean.

I'm game if you are, lady. We should discuss it over PMs or something. :)
 
VanillaCreme said:
Don't start.

He already did and I am going to finish it. What the hell do these people want out of me that they have to keep pushing my buttons? There's one person who just joined two days ago that's already having fun getting in my face. What the hell did this guy expect me to do, swear at you and personally attack you? I said yes respectfully and that still wasn't good enough.


Let me try to get this thread out of the bunker and onto the green for TB.

I purchase a cologne from Amazon called Uomo by Ermenegildo Zegna that smells and works so good that even I get a lot of compliments.

This is a decent price for a big bottle and a small one.
 
lifestream said:
ladyforsaken said:
I did think of that. But I think if people are able to discuss like adults and not start getting defensive at every point stated so that the discussion can continue in a civilised manner, it can happen. Unfortunately, people can be very sensitive beings who jump on every point stated that might offend them and use that against everyone who opposes their opinion or idea, if you know what I mean.

I'm game if you are, lady. We should discuss it over PMs or something. :)

I think I alluded to this in the PM I sent you, lifestream :) I'm all for transparency and openness but some of my most meaningful conversations with members here have been in PMs. :)

-Teresa


Funnily enough, I thought of this thread this morning as I was shopping with my daughter. We walked by a store (Abercrombie & Fitch) that had a super-strong scent coming from it. I think I read somewhere that they are one of the companies that pump fragrance into their stores to influence shoppers' buying decisions. I didn't like the smell, though, so I didn't find the store so attractive :D

-Teresa
 
To answer my own question.
I would say how to look good when you aren't very attractive ?
Clothes for one thing. Smart, interesting clothes.
How many unattractive people wear rubbish clothes ? Loads !
I mean when you look at somebody, you don't just look at their face do you ?
You look at all of them ! And that includes what the person is wearing.
How many women look stunning simply because of how nice their dress is ?
Or their make up ? Or maybe some interesting rings etc ?

So I would say never ever become a slob. Don't ever drop your standards. Wear smart, interesting clothes, maybe something different, unusual and you are making yourself
look a lot better.

I haven't read most of this thread because it seems like people are just disagreeing with each other.


ladyforsaken said:
TheSkaFish said:
I think TB would find much more acceptance from wearing a hat than a wig. I feel people would criticize the wig much more, and actually be more receptive to his wearing a hat, especially if it's a nice one that compliments him. I've never really been a hat guy myself except in winter, I wear winter hats. But I don't know about much else to give him advice on it. I just think that if it's between a hat or a wig, I would guess that a hat would be the better option.

I can see what you mean with people criticising those who wear wigs. But in a way, I feel like some people think it's the lesser of the two evils, between wearing a wig and not wearing a wig, showing off their shaven head or a hat that still doesn't exactly hide their shaven head (even if a fully bald person wears a hat, you can still pretty much tell they're fully bald). I could understand these people though... they wear wigs for a lot of reasons and not many can accept how they look due to whatever the circumstances. I never told anyone this but a few people close to me, but I had a hard time when I had to shave my head off because of what chemo was doing to me. I've always had long, waist-length hair and the first day I decided to shave my head, I cried. As much as I don't care for appearance in anyone, it's still hard to be viewed as "damaged" or something like that. I still had a hard time going out with a scarf on, on top of the little beanie type of hat and I always thought it looked awful on me. No matter how much I covered up, it was still pretty obvious in the day light.

So in a way I can understand what TB might feel, with or without a hat, with or without a wig, people are bound to criticise anyway cos he doesn't look "normal" to what society prefers. So what can you do? What did I do? I lived with it. There comes a point in time when you just realise it's not worth your time and energy worrying about what people might think of your appearance. I tried to be happy with how I look no matter how hard it was.. I think the most important thing is to realise that people will always be mean about it (I even had strangers tell me I was ugly), so I might as well live contentedly with my appearance the best way I can. If I'm not kind to myself, who can be?

Believe it or not, that doesn't mean it's all good. I still have issues with how I look. I still shy away from strangers who come knocking at the door... I still cover my head when we get visitors. You just have to learn to live with it... or work around it.

And I'm glad TB is still trying to improve his appearance to feel better about himself. I hope you'll find some peace with your appearance, TB. Good luck.

Hey thanks. I would never wear a wig. I like my hats though !
 
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