TheSkaFish said:
I think TB would find much more acceptance from wearing a hat than a wig. I feel people would criticize the wig much more, and actually be more receptive to his wearing a hat, especially if it's a nice one that compliments him. I've never really been a hat guy myself except in winter, I wear winter hats. But I don't know about much else to give him advice on it. I just think that if it's between a hat or a wig, I would guess that a hat would be the better option.
I can see what you mean with people criticising those who wear wigs. But in a way, I feel like some people think it's the lesser of the two evils, between wearing a wig and not wearing a wig, showing off their shaven head or a hat that still doesn't exactly hide their shaven head (even if a fully bald person wears a hat, you can still pretty much tell they're fully bald). I could understand these people though... they wear wigs for a lot of reasons and not many can accept how they look due to whatever the circumstances. I never told anyone this but a few people close to me, but I had a hard time when I had to shave my head off because of what chemo was doing to me. I've always had long, waist-length hair and the first day I decided to shave my head, I cried. As much as I don't care for appearance in anyone, it's still hard to be viewed as "damaged" or something like that. I still had a hard time going out with a scarf on, on top of the little beanie type of hat and I always thought it looked awful on me. No matter how much I covered up, it was still pretty obvious in the day light.
So in a way I can understand what TB might feel, with or without a hat, with or without a wig, people are bound to criticise anyway cos he doesn't look "normal" to what society prefers. So what can you do? What did I do? I lived with it. There comes a point in time when you just realise it's not worth your time and energy worrying about what people might think of your appearance. I tried to be happy with how I look no matter how hard it was.. I think the most important thing is to realise that people will always be mean about it (I even had strangers tell me I was ugly), so I might as well live contentedly with my appearance the best way I can. If I'm not kind to myself, who can be?
Believe it or not, that doesn't mean it's all good. I still have issues with how I look. I still shy away from strangers who come knocking at the door... I still cover my head when we get visitors. You just have to learn to live with it... or work around it.
And I'm glad TB is still trying to improve his appearance to feel better about himself. I hope you'll find some peace with your appearance, TB. Good luck.