I can't Believe I Stuffed My Chance

[jb5799]

Hi all
Don't know if this is posted in the right place but here goes
feeling really down and lonely right now. Ive had feelings for
a Girl Ive seen around for about 9 years. And recently I had the
chance to go and speak to her and tell her how I feel only problem is my Shyness Im 32 and a Virgin I have difficulty in approaching Girls. She knew that I liked her and we often made eye contact when in a Nightclub but I could not find the courage to go and say Hi. Now Ive found out someone else has and I feel Gutted
How could I be so stupid as to not go over and tell her.I find myself waiting and hoping for another chance to let her know. All my Friends have Girlfriends and Families and I feel so left behind and its starting to worry me. Any advice on How im supposed to move forward and stop thinking about this Girl ?

 

[Unacceptance]

1 of two possibilities will happen logically.

The other relationship will fail, giving you a second chance which you now know to take. The other relationship will work out, leaving you to meet someone else, not get involved in her life not worry about it and now you also know to take the chance when it comes again.

In either case you've learned and applying it for the future is really what matters.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Work on your selfesteem..

Work out your fears. Identify them.

Get in touch with your emotions or feelings...identify them

Get some self help books. Plenty of data on how to improve yourself
and understanding yourself.

Get rid of your guilt or shame.

Identy your assests and liablities.

Learn how to meditate...learn how to let go.
learn how to be in the moment
learn how to go with the flow.

Too many possiblites...Open up your mind or yourself... Be creative.

Get rid of your internal conflicts or work on them.
Learn how to be in the moment and not in your head.

Take up excercise...wieght lifting , jogging....etc
Take baby steps...in process you'll learn how to disciplne
yourself. Actions...actions....actions.
Run an extra mile , do an extra rep of wieght lifting.
You learn how to move forward inspite of want your (feelings)
mind or body tells you...you'll learn how to master your mind
and body. I'll establish goals and know and take actions.
You learn how to beliving in yourself.

Learn how to interact with people. Put yourself out there.
Flirt...learn how to flirt..put yourself out there.
Flirt with all of them...you found out...you're not going to
see her again...

So wont worry so damn much if you flirt
wrong...you'll get better as you go.
You have everything to gain and nothing to lose.
F-it get a book on how to seduce a woman and apply the instructions.
Don't worry so god much what others morals values are..or what is right or wrong for them.
Do what is right for you. You havn't had a girl friend...that's all wrong, evidently.

If you have good self esteem...you'll learn not to worry so
damn much what other people think or do.

You learn how to accept rejections...and sometimes if you
get rejected...you know it has nothing to do with you.
Rejection might effect you...but it's not going to stop
you in your tracks...you'll learn how to move forward inspite
of your feelings or pains.

Other times...you'll just attract certain people anyway if you're
happy and have good self esteem. You 'll be in a natural state
of being happy. Youll interact with so many people...a bueatiful
girl will just be another person

Surround yourself by possitive people.
Ignore negative people , places and things.

 

[Arnaert]

Just tell her the truth! Tell her! Tell her! Tell her! You're already 32, take a risk, this is your life, do you really want to waste it? You have to take risks, or you'll never be truly happy.

 

[jb5799]

Just tell her the truth! Tell her! Tell her! Tell her! You're already 32, take a risk, this is your life, do you really want to waste it? You have to take risks, or you'll never be truly happy.

Is there any point now that she has met someone else Don't think she would be interested in what I have to say

 

[Arnaert]

Just tell her the truth! Tell her! Tell her! Tell her! You're already 32, take a risk, this is your life, do you really want to waste it? You have to take risks, or you'll never be truly happy.

Is there any point now that she has met someone else Don't think she would be interested in what I have to say

What if its not that serious? Or what if you know you'd love her more than anyone else. Whomever this person is, you've gone through more cos of how much you love her.

 

[SenjiiDragon]

Hi all
Don't know if this is posted in the right place but here goes
feeling really down and lonely right now. Ive had feelings for
a Girl Ive seen around for about 9 years. And recently I had the
chance to go and speak to her and tell her how I feel only problem is my Shyness Im 32 and a Virgin I have difficulty in approaching Girls. She knew that I liked her and we often made eye contact when in a Nightclub but I could not find the courage to go and say Hi. Now Ive found out someone else has and I feel Gutted
How could I be so stupid as to not go over and tell her.I find myself waiting and hoping for another chance to let her know. All my Friends have Girlfriends and Families and I feel so left behind and its starting to worry me. Any advice on How im supposed to move forward and stop thinking about this Girl ?

Lets say she breaks up with this guy sometime soon. Will you have the guts to say hi to her then? Be honest. Maybe not.

In meantime, why not get some practice? Google how to approach women, learn about body language, etc. And then get some practice actually approaching women.

That way, if and when this girl becomes available, you'll be ready. Besides, you might find someone else between now and then!

 

[Spare]

I've been there, brother. In my case the guy who beat me to it was my best friend (he was unaware of my feelings for her). I knew with a cold certainty that they would be together for as long as I knew them. And they were. And it was brutally hard. But in the end I decided it was better to have her in my life then not, even if she was my best friend's girlfriend. This, by proxy, made her one of my best friends, one of the best friends I've ever had.

Accepting her as a friend made it a little easier to move on. Hope I helped.

 

[imagineer]

Just tell her the truth! Tell her! Tell her! Tell her! You're already 32, take a risk, this is your life, do you really want to waste it? You have to take risks, or you'll never be truly happy.

Is there any point now that she has met someone else Don't think she would be interested in what I have to say

Hate to say this; but Arnaert's right.

I don't know of anyone who has had strong feelings for the same person for 9 years without getting up the courage once to tell them what's going on. How many more 9 year periods do you think that you will have in your life, and what are the chances that you would have such affections for a girl as significant and enduring as this.

Part of showing your love for someone is to be open about your thoughts and feelings, and be vulnerable and not be concerned about how foolish it may seem to some. Sometimes there is no way in life around this, than to bite the bullet; since she's already in a relationship, be prepared for a rejection and don't expect any positive response; but you never know what would happen.

Either way, in the long run, you will be much better off.