I don't belong anywhere?

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sicaKAWAII said:
Lost Soul said:
Don't feel bad. You stand a much better chance than I do! Stay strong. You have the music in you! :)

I have faith in you.

Nah, why would you say that? I'm hopeless, I know it. How about you? I wasn't able to make certain of this but are you in the same situation as I have?

It's not hopeless for either of you. (It's not hopeless for anyone, really) Just keep trying and don't give up.
 
rollingtrouble said:
Yes, I definately do. It didn't used to be that way for me earlier in life, but after a bad accident nine years ago that left me in a wheelchair as a quadriplegic, I am now left with social issues. I can't go out in public without being stared at like some kinda freak. I can't do many things for myself anymore that I used to take for granted. Simple things like going out to eat and having to have someone else cut my food for me, opening doors for me, helping me navigate obsticles wheeling in public, etc. is so embarassing for me. I lost friends because I was no longer able to particpate in most activities I used to enjoy doing, and that loss of common interest and ability made the friendships grow not only far apart, but lost altogether. I feel so vulnerable, and am not physically able to defend myself personally. I can't remove myself from any dangerous or bad situations very quickly at all. So I find myself avoiding even going anywhere or meeting anyone. Even when I go out, to the store or any kind of events with people, I feel so out of place and stick out like a sore thumb. People stare, and I hate that so bad. I don't fit in anymore anywhere, I am a stranger inside my broken unresponsive body that does not move or feel anymore. I am truly an outcast, a prisoner condemned for life in this broken body with no chance of parole, no pardon, no chance of escape.

I don't really know what to say in this kind of circumstance but I just want you to know that you are a strong person. Eventhough it's really been hard for you, you still faced your life head on. Just continue believing in on God. He's always there for us. There were times that I felt like giving up but whenever I think that he is just there beside me, all the negative emotions I feel just disappear.


Callie said:
sicaKAWAII said:
Lost Soul said:
Don't feel bad. You stand a much better chance than I do! Stay strong. You have the music in you! :)

I have faith in you.

Nah, why would you say that? I'm hopeless, I know it. How about you? I wasn't able to make certain of this but are you in the same situation as I have?

It's not hopeless for either of you. (It's not hopeless for anyone, really) Just keep trying and don't give up.

i've been like this for almost 8 years already and nothing has changed. but you're right, i'll have try again.
 
The problem with feeling like you don't belong is that it can make you desperate to belong. I've never felt wanted in my life, by anyone. Over the past 18 months, I generated friendships with two lads. You know, just to have me around they have lent/given me money just so they could have my company. In return, I have gone out with them even when I wanted to be alone because after a 'No thanks', they continue to persist in asking me. My mum says I cave in to them to easily, but she doesn't understand that it's just nice to feel wanted.

Now, I've learnt that one of my friends has started taking cocaine, again. He knows my feelings on it, but he will continue to take it. For the sake of my career, I feel I can't be associated with him, anymore, but I also fear losing that sense of being wanted.

You may not feel you fit in, and perhaps you don't, but there will be a group where you do fit in. A group that shares a hobby, perhaps. There is something for you, out there, where likeminded people gather and socialise. You just need to try and find it, and not become desperate and make decisions that could lead down a bad path.
 
Callie said:
sicaKAWAII said:
Lost Soul said:
Don't feel bad. You stand a much better chance than I do! Stay strong. You have the music in you! :)

I have faith in you.

Nah, why would you say that? I'm hopeless, I know it. How about you? I wasn't able to make certain of this but are you in the same situation as I have?

It's not hopeless for either of you. (It's not hopeless for anyone, really) Just keep trying and don't give up.

You are a girl, girls stand a better chance at finding someone than lonely, insecure guys. Trust me on this one. I'm sure you're good looking. You can find a guy to like you, just be yourself. Don't wait for the guy to make the first move, because honestly, Usually, guys are more nervous then girls are. Guys just stand there and hope a girl makes the first move.
 
I have always been an outcast, never had friends except for one brief period. I think the secret is to find something you are really interested in and devote your time to that.

Just because you don’t fit in doesn’t mean your not a worthwhile person, your just different. It always sounds silly to say love yourself, but I believe this is the first step to taking control of your life in a positive way.
 
Ricky6 said:
I have always been an outcast, never had friends except for one brief period. I think the secret is to find something you are really interested in and devote your time to that.

Just because you don’t fit in doesn’t mean your not a worthwhile person, your just different. It always sounds silly to say love yourself, but I believe this is the first step to taking control of your life in a positive way.

Yes.
 
I have often thought about why I feel alone in social settings. I am always the person sitting in the shadows hoping someone will notice me. But I think deep down that is just who I am. I have come to realize that I enjoy my loneliness on most days because without it I would have to give up a certain amount of freedom that naturally comes when maintaining a friendship. But don't get me wrong, I like talking to people, I just find too many like myself that can truly understand me. I use to think I was a unique person and would never find others like me, but one day I stated writing stories and posted them on the net, and all of a sudden I started finding others who shared a similar thought. So I do know there are other.
 
Seems like alot of people here recognice my feelings. It makes me feel less lonely but also sad. I mean no one should have to feel like this. There's billions of us on this rock, I mean, wtf there should be at least someone for everyone. Right?
 
I find that I feel I belong in groups where a) others may not feel they belong, or b) I'm so focused on my interest in being there that I don't worry about "belonging": I've felt welcomed at self help groups of people who identify as shy or depressed, or even when I go out by myself (which is a A LOT), I feel content in certain cafe's, museums/galleries, theatres. Honestly, when I listen to the conversations of people around me I'm so glad I have the ability to walk away from them! :-D Of course, there are some people where I really do think, "wow, they seem really smart, interesting and kind.", and then I just take a deep breath, do the courageous thing and .... pine. Or say something, and they smile and comment, and then... that's it, and I have to be content with that sweet moment with a stranger.

There are very few people with whom I feel I don't have to hide or dumb myself down, or shut myself off to.
 
I feel unwelcome even on a Naturist site, but I have less problems there then any other forum I've been on.
 
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