I Don't Want To Marry Or have Kids.. Does It Worry You Hearin That If Your A Female?

[Retrospective81]

Evenin all,

Well after sometime reconsidering things etc I discovered that Im not really interested in marriage or having any kids. In fact, Ive completely ruled it out. It just wouldn't suit my lifestyle in the long run. I just want to ahve a bit of a realtionship, not too serious with absolutely NO COMMITMENTS. How do you think I'd Fair? would it worry the majority of you ladies if you was to date me? (hypothetically of course!)

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Can't say that it would be a problem. A lot of women don't want to marry or have kids.

 

[Bei]

Personally, I would not continue dating a man who wasn't looking for any serious commitments but that's just me. You would really just have to find someone who was looking for the same thing as you. So yes, it would worry some ladies but not all.

 

[Sigma]

This is all entirely dependent on the woman in question, however it's probably a good idea to make this known relatively soon in a relationship that's not short term, saves a lot of trouble later.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I'm female, and I'm not interested in marriage either. Just a personal choice. I wouldn't mind having kids though, either having biological kids or adoption - if I ever get the chance to do either.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I don't see the point in dating without commitment.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I don't see the point in dating without commitment.

Personally, I don't either. But some people just see it as something fun to do. They have their group or people's they hang with. They see a guy or girl they like, who I would assume has mutual interest in just being with them as well, and they think nothing more of it. Not everyone's relationship has to be serious though. I wouldn't exactly call them flings, but some people just aren't serious about it.

 

[Retrospective81]

Thanks for the answers folks Yeah I guess Im just after a fling nowadays after what Ive been through. By heck, one life..might aswell live it as less seriously as you can . I guess really im jsut a man's man (not in a homosexual way) just prefer drinking, smoking, playin pool, general guys stuff and a few hours slap and tickle with a woman then Im happy as larry!

 

[Moe'sTavern]

Thanks for the answers folks Yeah I guess Im just after a fling nowadays after what Ive been through. By heck, one life..might aswell live it as less seriously as you can . I guess really im jsut a man's man (not in a homosexual way) just prefer drinking, smoking, playin pool, general guys stuff and a few hours slap and tickle with a woman then Im happy as larry!

I find it hilarious that you had to point this out. As far as the post, there are women out there who want neither marriage or kids. It'll just be a bit more difficult to find them I suppose.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

I probably will be the same way. Here is why:

1. I am probably incapable of being a good parent. I didn't have a good parent growing up, and I am barely able to be a capable adult, so I don't see myself being able to care for another human being for 18 years.

2. I am terrified of getting up in front of people, so a wedding would scare the hell out of me. Unless I eloped, I wouldn't want to get married.

Also cue in that the only way I could possibly have sex is if I wasn't committed, because I would make a terrible boyfriend...and I probably would be best off with one night stands.

 

[Shipster0958]

I'm sure there are women out there who want the same thing in theory. I have a feeling though a woman may change her opinion as the relationship naturally progressed. Women are just wired a bit differently.

 

[ladyforsaken]

I'm sure there are women out there who want the same thing in theory. I have a feeling though a woman may change her opinion as the relationship naturally progressed. Women are just wired a bit differently.

This .. out of experience, this.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Depends on whether they like kids or not. Some people don't.

Marriage may be a dealbreaker, though. Many relationships have ended because one partner couldn't commit.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Commitment doesn't mean marriage, to some anyway, myself included. And being married doesn't necessarily mean one is committed.

But I would also have to agree with what Lady agreed with and what Ship said. Thoughts may change. Mine kind of have on the kids things. Two years ago, I would have said, "Absolutely would love to have some with him." But now, it's a bit faded, for the simple fact of his actions - or lack thereof.

 

[Lilith]

Damn, this makes me respect you A LOT even though I don't know you XD

 

[Ignis]

If we're talking from a relationship perspective, and if it was a woman who told me she didn't wanna marry or have kids... If I loved her enough it wouldn't matter.

Her opinion could very well change, but relationships are about sacrifice. If she doesn't want it, she doesn't want it. Who am I to force it on her?
If I love her enough, I respect her choice; and see if her mind changes over the years.

Then again, if we're talking about a casual, fun relationship... I doubt either of you want to marry OR have kids, so you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

 

[Sarah_Lbnz]

Commitment doesn't mean marriage, to some anyway, myself included. And being married doesn't necessarily mean one is committed.

But I would also have to agree with what Lady agreed with and what Ship said. Thoughts may change. Mine kind of have on the kids things. Two years ago, I would have said, "Absolutely would love to have some with him." But now, it's a bit faded, for the simple fact of his actions - or lack thereof.

Even though I think I do not want kids or want to marry, if my partner said that, I wouldn't take the relationship seriously. My default mode is to be involved in deep intimate relationships, and I carefully examine the actions of the other person to see if they are worth the emotional investment. If they tell me they don't want children or marriage (signs of potential commitment), all bets are off. I totally have a double standard, I know.

 

[painter's radio]

Personally I think marriage is idiotic and kids are smelly little *******s, but hey when I commit to a woman I give it 110%

 

[Waffle]

Personally I think marriage is idiotic and kids are smelly little *******s, but hey when I commit to a woman I give it 110%

Somewhat similar feelings and I am a female so as you can see there are girls who don't look for marriage or kids. On the other hand commitment is something that majority will ask for even without the marriage in question.
I would personally only look for a serious long term commitment with a partner since I prefer meaningful life contributing relationships.
Just make sure to be up front that you are looking for a fling to avoid hurting anyone's feelings.

One must also think about the fact that females are looked down at if they are only looking for hook ups or flings thus most will be very quiet about it.

 

[blackdot]

Evenin all,

Well after sometime reconsidering things etc I discovered that Im not really interested in marriage or having any kids. In fact, Ive completely ruled it out. It just wouldn't suit my lifestyle in the long run. I just want to ahve a bit of a realtionship, not too serious with absolutely NO COMMITMENTS. How do you think I'd Fair? would it worry the majority of you ladies if you was to date me? (hypothetically of course!)

You'd fit in with most of the women on dating websites if you aren't looking to marry or have kids.