I feel like an abject failure...

[Among the Sleep]

This is my first post in a few months (I forgot my password and the confirmation email thing wasn't working, lol). So I've been waiting to get some things off my chest, this is usually a good place for it. Anyway...

I'm 23 years old. Currently I'm still living at home and I'm delivering pizzas. I dropped out of college, really have no idea what I wanna do with my life and I feel kind of embarrassed to be in the position that I'm in at my (obviously still young) age. I mean, granted at least I have a job, it's enough to pay my cell phone, car insurance, and to pay my mom rent. But I have to dump a few hundred into my car this week, which is enough to remind me of how unlikely it is that I'm going to be able to move out any time soon. I need a better job, more money...I dunno.

A lack of confidence has always been a problem in my life. My fear of failure tends to paralyze me. I'm sincerely afraid that I'm never really going to be on my feet. Is it irrational for me to be this scared about all this? I mean, again, I'm 23 years old. I feel a hell of a lot older than I did like, 3 years ago even, but I know I'm still young and I know I have time to figure my **** out. But I'm afraid I won't. I don't think I'm really an intelligent person, I don't have he best work ethic you've ever seen, at least if my heart isn't really in to what I'm working on. I have very few interests, even. I just exist in this constant state of boredom and anxiety, I'm just like, uncomfortable in a human body, I mean, fundamentally.

I wanna find something I'm good at. I wanna find something I enjoy. But sometimes watching other people my age be successful just bums me out. I have trouble seeing a real future for myself. Again, maybe it's irrational. But I just wanted to write a post since I haven't in a while.

 

[kamya]

Are...are you me? :O Everything you posted is me and if it wasn't for my family moving away, I would still be living with them too.

I just turned 24 and it wasn't until maybe 8-10 months ago that I decided what I wanted to do and how I was going to accomplish it. I didn't do anything special, it just clicked one night. Hopefully you get lucky too. Just keep at it. You can only be bored for so long before you find at least one thing to enjoy.

 

[Toastedone]

I know you feel, I was that way at 20 now I'm 23 and I have a job, I did it through a program called Jobcorps its a government funded program its a trade school. and they teach a verity of subjects and allow you get certification that would normally cost you a bunch of money along with offering hands on training. Housing and Food are free. and there found all over the country. You get paid a small sum and they have WBL's (work base learning) that actually pay a good some of money. I got to go to Treasure Island in California for a competition and got to work at CraterLake.
Its a good a good start and you get out of the program what you put into it so it helps you to learn to be self motivated.
any ways food for thought.
Remember while its good to compare your self with others to judge progress its important to remember you cant concider your self a failure based on others accomplishments. Don't give up!

 

[duff]

we all can't have wonderfull exciting jobs. Some people have to be a dustman, window cleaner, road sweeper !

 

[Tinderleaf]

I just felt like I read the story of my life. Except, only I'm younger (21), hanging there in College (University in Australia) and still living with my parents without a clear future in mind. Over the years of study, my goal has been to achieve a future career somewhere in the IT sector but it has been a tough road getting there, dealing with plenty of frustration, failure and stress over my studies. Not to mention, suffering from the comparison syndrome towards others in your age group succeeding far more than you are but honestly, we're all unique individuals with different life experiences. As such, while some people may be more fortunate. intelligent and overall independent than others, the best thing we can do for ourselves is to not only learn from their success but also to learn from our mistakes and make the most out of turning the issues around, getting back on track to succeed. Also, don't let your past mistakes hinder you on your way to recovery, just as long as you've established that goal in mind and prepare to commit yourself to it. If you're finding that idea a bit overwhelming, just focus on one thing at a time but do that one thing really well and hopefully you'll make it. Of course, if you're still having trouble finding your way, seeing a counsellor or therapist would help a lot too.

Also, speaking more upon comparison syndrome, I just try not to worry about others too much and simply just try and be positive about myself. As such, being in the early to mid 20s, I feel there's still plenty of time to achieve my goals no matter what anyone says or achieves further and with that in mind, I'm happy to stick at my own pace and work as best I can bit by bit. Lastly, don't give up and don't put pressure on yourself especially if things aren't going your way as it's best to relax, learn and take it as a learning experience instead. And really, I wish you the best of luck to get back on track, as there's always light at the end of the tunnel, much like what I'm trying to do now.

 

[isthatso]

If it's any help, I am 54 years old and still unsure of my career. How long can I stand my current job and what I am going to do next?

So don't feel like you have to have all the answers at such an early age. For me it has been a gradual process of finding out what I am not suited too. Any work experience is valuable in my view, even if you hate a certain job, it gives you an insight or understanding into what people have to do to survive everyday. I never did pizza delivery but I bet you have some interesting stories to tell us about the job.
There's no such thing as a job for life anymore is there .....

 

[Misanthrope23]

This is my first post in a few months (I forgot my password and the confirmation email thing wasn't working, lol). So I've been waiting to get some things off my chest, this is usually a good place for it. Anyway...

I'm 23 years old. Currently I'm still living at home and I'm delivering pizzas. I dropped out of college, really have no idea what I wanna do with my life and I feel kind of embarrassed to be in the position that I'm in at my (obviously still young) age. I mean, granted at least I have a job, it's enough to pay my cell phone, car insurance, and to pay my mom rent. But I have to dump a few hundred into my car this week, which is enough to remind me of how unlikely it is that I'm going to be able to move out any time soon. I need a better job, more money...I dunno.

A lack of confidence has always been a problem in my life. My fear of failure tends to paralyze me. I'm sincerely afraid that I'm never really going to be on my feet. Is it irrational for me to be this scared about all this? I mean, again, I'm 23 years old. I feel a hell of a lot older than I did like, 3 years ago even, but I know I'm still young and I know I have time to figure my **** out. But I'm afraid I won't. I don't think I'm really an intelligent person, I don't have he best work ethic you've ever seen, at least if my heart isn't really in to what I'm working on. I have very few interests, even. I just exist in this constant state of boredom and anxiety, I'm just like, uncomfortable in a human body, I mean, fundamentally.

I wanna find something I'm good at. I wanna find something I enjoy. But sometimes watching other people my age be successful just bums me out. I have trouble seeing a real future for myself. Again, maybe it's irrational. But I just wanted to write a post since I haven't in a while.

ahh yes. abject failure. is this not the only kind of failure? (i want to say something witty but i'm too tired to think of anything.) but not tired enough to fall asleep. i feel like i'm in the same situation as you are. i mean i am taking college classes and i have a degree, but it's still very hard to find a job in this economy. i only have a volunteering job but that's only once a week. i'm going for my second degree so that i'll have a better chance at getting a job, but i have no idea how i'll be able to pay my student loan. i feel like i haven't a clue as to where to go from here. i know there are resources but i don't know how to use them.