I feel pathetic

[SophiaGrace]

Someone playing a board game with me, once every weekend for the past 3 weeks, has shown me more attention in person than anyone in the past 5 years.

I just realized that.

 

[dead]

dear, that does not make you pathetic though :/

 

[SophiaGrace]

dear, that does not make you pathetic though :/

I know this is a dumb question but why not?

 

[dead]

because **** happens to good people sometimes.

 

[theSmokingRabbit]

I'm jelly.

-_-


I receive no such attention.

 

[21acceptedbeingalone]

I am jelly as well. I am even more pathetic haha. At least you have someone to play board games with.

 

[Equinox]

You've been playing board games with someone every weekend for the past three weeks? Wow, I wish I had that much of a social life. If that makes you pathetic, what does it make me?

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Someone playing a board game with me, once every weekend for the past 3 weeks, has shown me more attention in person than anyone in the past 5 years.

I just realized that.

Yeah, I second the replies: why does that make you pathetic?

The worst thing it could possibly say about you is that you're not mixing with people much. That's a personal choice up to you, not inherently negative. And it's something you have the power to change.

Another equally realistic assessment would be that you're just unlucky and the people you've met are superficial and uncaring - quite possible given the number of people like that out there.

Anyway, I've offered to talk to you before if you would like. You only ever need to drop me a PM

 

[Zak]

Why would that make you pathetic? Am I missing something? I see an edit in your post.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I feel pathetic because it's just board games, and someone that wants to learn sign language in order to talk to me. It evoked memories of me being mostlly ignored by people, or people that were superficial (not that I ever really tried too hard with friendships because I had been conditioned by years of being alone and being stared at). It just made me realize how ignored i've felt for years.

5 years ago, i had a friend at college that actually wanted to hang out, she threw me my first suprise birthday party (during which i prompty was thrown out of her dorm because she left me unattended, it was a good joke), and we used to watch the TV show Heroes together every monday and we helped each other with our homework.

It's just simple things, only simple things, and yet the fact that it has made me aware of this deep psychological thirst within me that I feel tha tmost people can slake with ease just, I don't know. How would you feel?

 

[Zak]

*hugs*

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

5 years ago, i had a friend at college that actually wanted to hang out, she threw me my first suprise birthday party (during which i prompty was thrown out of her dorm because she left me unattended, it was a good joke), and we used to watch the TV show Heroes together every monday and we helped each other with our homework.

It's just simple things, only simple things, and yet the fact that it has made me aware of this deep psychological thirst within me that I feel tha tmost people can slake with ease just, I don't know. How would you feel?

Well, I think most of us feel it's tough to quench that thirst for interaction, so I suppose most of us are "pathetic" by that definition! Fortunately I disagree with that assessment, because I don't feel anyone here is pathetic

It's awful that those people did that to you. I'm sorry that happened, there's no excuse for it. The world seems to be full of cruel and idiotic types sometimes.

I don't have any social life at all off of these boards right now. I disappear from the radar whenever I'm not at work really. I appreciate things like hugs a lot more than most other people due to their rarity and I can feel that same emotion you describe of that deep...longing? I guess.

I even share the hearing problems, of course. I don't think mine are as bad perhaps, but I know the isolation that brings with it.

What you're feeling is entirely natural, this should remind you that it is far from pathetic. As human beings we have an innate need to be social and accepted, to denounce that need as a weakness or frailty is to deny being human at all.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you should be happy you're getting that attention and upbeat about the future if you can be. You're a very kind and interesting person, I have no doubt that friendships and relationships are out there waiting for you somewhere.

What people have or haven't done for you for the past 5 years is irrelevant. Many people are fickle, shallow beings at the best of times.

Instead turn the focus on what makes you feel fulfilled - and if that's something as innocent and wholesome as playing a board game with someone weekly, good for you

 

[Nolife Princess]

I feel pathetic because it's just board games, and someone that wants to learn sign language in order to talk to me. It evoked memories of me being mostlly ignored by people, or people that were superficial (not that I ever really tried too hard with friendships because I had been conditioned by years of being alone and being stared at). It just made me realize how ignored i've felt for years.

5 years ago, i had a friend at college that actually wanted to hang out, she threw me my first suprise birthday party (during which i prompty was thrown out of her dorm because she left me unattended, it was a good joke), and we used to watch the TV show Heroes together every monday and we helped each other with our homework.

It's just simple things, only simple things, and yet the fact that it has made me aware of this deep psychological thirst within me that I feel tha tmost people can slake with ease just, I don't know. How would you feel?

Sophie, Are you deaf too?

being deaf rocks! why? because we are unique in our own way!!

 

[In a lonely place]

Someone playing a board game with me, once every weekend for the past 3 weeks, has shown me more attention in person than anyone in the past 5 years.

I just realized that.

I'm amazed at that. Your posts are always kind and caring and I love your signature thing.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Someone playing a board game with me, once every weekend for the past 3 weeks, has shown me more attention in person than anyone in the past 5 years.

I just realized that.

I'm amazed at that. Your posts are always kind and caring and I love your signature thing.

I am not always kind and caring. you just haven't seen me "snap" at anyone on here. Which I have done before.

but thank you for the compliment.

I tend to isolate a lot more when my depression worsens/my hygiene worsens. And also i feel like people wouldn't want to be my friend because of how I look. Also i've gotten way too used to having friends online.

I don't know. Almost all my friends are online.

---

I feel pathetic because it's just board games, and someone that wants to learn sign language in order to talk to me. It evoked memories of me being mostlly ignored by people, or people that were superficial (not that I ever really tried too hard with friendships because I had been conditioned by years of being alone and being stared at). It just made me realize how ignored i've felt for years.

5 years ago, i had a friend at college that actually wanted to hang out, she threw me my first suprise birthday party (during which i prompty was thrown out of her dorm because she left me unattended, it was a good joke), and we used to watch the TV show Heroes together every monday and we helped each other with our homework.

It's just simple things, only simple things, and yet the fact that it has made me aware of this deep psychological thirst within me that I feel tha tmost people can slake with ease just, I don't know. How would you feel?

Sophie, Are you deaf too?

being deaf rocks! why? because we are unique in our own way!!

i'm hard of hearing. I have bilateral hearing aides.

 

[VanillaCreme]

That doesn't make you pathetic. Spending time with someone, regardless of who they are or what you're doing together, is something nice.

 

[roguewave]

Every once in a while I have these types of realizations and it hits me like a ton of bricks. I realize how alone I really am and for a moment I am paralyzed with horrible feelings.
In a few days the feeling usually fades because I become preoccupied with something else.
My brain has been trained pretty well not to let myself feel these feelings. Once I get close, I short circuit and then feel numbness which is better than feeling the pathetic aloneness...but it isn't fool proof.
You could take this route and train yourself not to take notice of certain feelings. It's not healthy, but it is a survival mechanism and I have not felt suicidal since.

 

[nerdygirl]

You're not pathetic. I'm pretty sure there are quite a few of us who would be happy to hang out with you if you lived nearby.

 

[SophiaGrace]

That doesn't make you pathetic. Spending time with someone, regardless of who they are or what you're doing together, is something nice.

thank you

 

[Tiina63]

I think it's really great that you have found someone to play boardgames with regularly. It's a big step forward and not pathetic at all. You should be feeling proud of yourself for making the effort to end your loneliness. Please don't put yourself down.