In need of some other opinions..

[cjk19]

Okay, so it's a long story but I promise to sum it up as best I can..

I'm 19, I live with my 28 yr old boyfriend and his four best friends. My mother and I don't speak, and my father passed away five years ago. I have been dating my boyfriend for more than a year.
Everything was great until recently, everything has hit such a low, I'm having trouble staying positive.
I have bought my boyfriend two cars, paid numerous bills for him, and helped him out when he was in need, so I figured when I lost my job two months ago, he could help me out in return....
About the same time I lost my job, one of his closest friends (also one of our roommates) lost his job as well. My boyfriend has been shelling out money to his friend (to buy things like a paint job for his car, money for bills, etc.) like he has millions to spare, when he really doesnt, and has yet to help me pay my part of the rent, when clearly I am unable to provide it at this moment.
He is starting to get frustrated with my not having money, and I can see where he has been treating me differently because of it...(he did nothing for me on valentines day, didnt care about our one year anniversay, he doesn't touch me as much, and he's just not being as kind as he once was.)
I buy all the groceries for the house, do all the cooking, all the cleaning, try to always do nice things for my boyfriend, and still pay my share of the rent. I even gave him my virginity, which is not something I planned on doing until I was married.
Some how this guy has got me blinded, and I am left feeling hurt and used.
Maybe it's just wierd between us because I don't see him very often? He works nights, and during the day I am cleaning, running errands, or trying to find a job.
I'm just not sure what to think anymore..

 

[Badjedidude]

Here's a hint:

DUMP HIS LAZY ******* *****-***. Seriously. He's 28 and can't even support himself or treat you right? What kind of loser is he? Come on...you're too young to get fouled up in the **** that this lame ******* is trying to push on you.

This guy is controlling you, and you can SEE that he's controlling you. Don't accept the shackles!! FIGHT BACK AND GET THE HELL OUT OF THIS SITUATION!! Drop the guy, find somewhere else to live, and move on with your life! *HUGS*

That might sound harsh, but really....this is your LIFE we're talking about. Do you want to end up being 40 years old and look back and see that you just sat by and let this all happen to you? Do something right NOW while you still can, and get away from scum like the guy you're with. *HUGS*

I hope this helped a bit. -_-

 

[mintymint]

The only sure way to judge people is by their actions. Look at what you've done for him and what he's done for you. Is there trust and respect? Do you like the way he treats you? From what you described it doesn't sound like a fair relationship.

 

[Brian]

I'm gonna be blunt here. He's a lazy, user sack of **** and he probably only likes you for two reasons:

A. You were buying him things/giving him money, ie a sugar mama
B. You're a nice, young piece of *** to him. He feels proud that at 28 he can still hook a pretty young thing like yourself.


Anything else is a lie to keep those benefits going.


Your boyfriend and his pals sound like the grungy-looking, go-nowhere scrotes I see around here and look down on all the time because their ability to fail at being decent people or hold a decent job makes me feel good about my own life.

 

[Badjedidude]

Honestly, cjk19, I think you're smart enough to recognize the situation you're in. If you could step back and look at it fresh, you'd see this for what it is.

This guy doesn't love you. He doesn't care about you at all. Brian's right. He lies for *** and money. That's all this ever meant to that guy. DUMP HIM and get the **** out of that house, for your own good.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Doesn't sound like he cares about you if you can't care for him. If you can't dish him money, he's not willing to do anything for you. And that's a bad way to be with anyone. Almost like, you're no longer of any use to him, other than sleeping with him, and usually that even goes away if he goes ahead and finds someone else. Don't allow yourself to be used. If I were you, I'd talk to my mom. Get a little job, and move back in with her if possible. I wouldn't want to be with someone who's like that. Someone nearly 10 years older than you and can't support himself by himself? There's better fish in the sea.

 

[cheaptrickfan]

Yep. He's a user and a taker. Dump his lazy, useless ***. You deserve better.

 

[Minus]

Lets see you have bought him cars and paid bills for him. Helping you with the rent, now that you need it, has no priority to him. You do all the shopping, cooking and cleaning for a house of six. He disregarded valentines day and your one year anniversary.

By any chance is he older than his friends because it really sounds like he needs to grow up. From what you describe it sounds like he uses you as a mother as much as anything.

Some how this guy has got me blinded...

It sure sounds that way and i would agree with cheaptrickfan that you deserve better.

 

[Steel]

I agree with the previous posters on this thread. I don't think I have anything additional to add however.

 

[Danielle]

2 words... DUMP HIM.

thats it... hes not good enough for you.

 

[Only Illusion]

A 19 year old sugar mama?? Sweet! If you ever decide to split and get out of where you are now let me know...I can make some room here

 

[shells]

OP, you know what you need to do.

The question is, are you fed up enough to do it?

 

[coricopat]

Sounds like you know exactly what the problem is, and just want some validation before you take action.

Consider yourself validated. DTMFA

 

[shells]

LOL, coricopat, I like that acronym.