Is She Flirting? What do I do?

[Jesse]

Help me. I'm pretty clueless.

So I've been hanging out with this girl and I'm starting to wonder if she's flirting or..what.

Well I was with her one night and I guess my driving scared her or something and she said her heart was beating really fast and she was like feel my heart. She took my hand and put it under her shirt on her chest region. A few fingers definately landed on a ****. She was like, see how fast it's going? I was like...uh yeah it sure is beating fast...

Didn't think much about it. Well I was hanging out with her again recently and somehow we started talking about massages and she said when she goes to get one she takes her panties off. She was saying how she loved massages and wanted one really bad. I was just like yeah...there's probably places around here you could go get one...

I've always considered her my friend, not because I wouldn't want more, but just because I never would think she'd be into me or like me as more than that, but I am starting to wonder. Maybe she's just really friendly?

Oh and this one time we were hanging out and it was about midnight and the "hang out" was about over. She asked me over to her house and said she was going to make me some milk and cookies. I wasn't really that hungry for cookies so I turned her down.

What should I do?

 

[badaboom]

Lol she sounds like she wants action..
Just make sure you don't turn into a f*** buddy
unless u want that, I would not recommend it

 

[Jesse]

Lol she sounds like she wants action..
Just make sure you don't turn into a f*** buddy
unless u want that, I would not recommend it

You thinks she wants to hook up huh? Hmn. Idk. I'm not sure why she'd want that. She could get a way better looking guy than me who has a good bod or something. She's incredibly stunning. She's actually a model. Idk why she'd come after me

But yeah I don't think I want a F*** buddy. I think it could ruin our friendship maybe and I really like hanging out with her.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

I wouldn't get too attached to her though yet because putting your hand under her shirt is pretty forward. If a girl did that to me I would not be thinking girlfriend material. Plus the way she's talking to you about the massage makes me think she's looking for some fun. Just don't be buying her stuff! Girls who act like that also tend to use guys for things so you have to kind of figure that out first.

Anyways, a girl like that MIGHT be messing around with multiple guys at the same time, and if that's the case and you don't care, you're really good to go. Personally I'd assume she was messing around with multiple guys just judging by what you said- you're not actually taking her on dates and she's still sounding open to action.

If you're worried that casually messing around with a girl is going to ruin a friendship- it's totally not. I've had girls like that where I never ever gave the hint that I would take them out on a date, but I would occasionally call them up to drink and mess around- or if I ran into them at a party I'd make a move. I never considered those girls "mine" in any way, and didn't mess around with them everytime I saw them, and it never ruined a friendship, and we were all perfectly happy with what we were doing.

I have a feeling though that if she keeps making such forward moves on you and you don't bite eventually, she's going to stop wanting to hang out when she finds somebody else to do something about it. It's just a feeling though and I can't guarantee that's what would go down. I've seen something like that happen though with one of my friends who was in a similar situation. If I was you I would TOTALLY make a move if she's good looking.

 

[Jesse]

I wouldn't get too attached to her though yet because putting your hand under her shirt is pretty forward. If a girl did that to me I would not be thinking girlfriend material. Plus the way she's talking to you about the massage makes me think she's looking for some fun. Just don't be buying her stuff! Girls who act like that also tend to use guys for things so you have to kind of figure that out first.

Anyways, a girl like that MIGHT be messing around with multiple guys at the same time, and if that's the case and you don't care, you're really good to go. Personally I'd assume she was messing around with multiple guys just judging by what you said- you're not actually taking her on dates and she's still sounding open to action.

If you're worried that casually messing around with a girl is going to ruin a friendship- it's totally not. I've had girls like that where I never ever gave the hint that I would take them out on a date, but I would occasionally call them up to drink and mess around- or if I ran into them at a party I'd make a move. I never considered those girls "mine" in any way, and didn't mess around with them everytime I saw them, and it never ruined a friendship, and we were all perfectly happy with what we were doing.

I have a feeling though that if she keeps making such forward moves on you and you don't bite eventually, she's going to stop wanting to hang out when she finds somebody else to do something about it. It's just a feeling though and I can't guarantee that's what would go down. I've seen something like that happen though with one of my friends who was in a similar situation. If I was you I would TOTALLY make a move if she's good looking.

She's very good looking actually. She does a lot of modeling. I guess I should add more information. I used to go to school with her and we've been friends for a while. It's not like I just met her, so maybe that changes perspective a little?

I certainly hope she doesn't want to hang out anymore if I don't make a move. For one thing I don't know how to make a move so it likely wouldn't happen. Even if I did know how to make a move, I'd be so scared I'd be paralyzed with fear.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

She's very good looking actually. She does a lot of modeling. I guess I should add more information. I used to go to school with her and we've been friends for a while. It's not like I just met her, so maybe that changes perspective a little?

I certainly hope she doesn't want to hang out anymore if I don't make a move. For one thing I don't know how to make a move so it likely wouldn't happen. Even if I did know how to make a move, I'd be so scared I'd be paralyzed with fear.

Did you just start hanging out though by yourselves recently? If so, then I'd really think she wanted you to make a move in the near future. If you have been hanging out together for a long time and she just started acting like this, I wouldn't be able to be as sure.

And this situation totally calls for alcohol if you drink at all. That would fix everything and give you an excuse if she didn't take to your advances.

 

[Jesse]

She's very good looking actually. She does a lot of modeling. I guess I should add more information. I used to go to school with her and we've been friends for a while. It's not like I just met her, so maybe that changes perspective a little?

I certainly hope she doesn't want to hang out anymore if I don't make a move. For one thing I don't know how to make a move so it likely wouldn't happen. Even if I did know how to make a move, I'd be so scared I'd be paralyzed with fear.

Did you just start hanging out though by yourselves recently? If so, then I'd really think she wanted you to make a move in the near future. If you have been hanging out together for a long time and she just started acting like this, I wouldn't be able to be as sure.

And this situation totally calls for alcohol if you drink at all. That would fix everything and give you an excuse if she didn't take to your advances.

Yeah we just started hanging out by ourselves recently. So you're sure she's flirting then? How do I make a move? What are moves exactly?

And yeah I drink every so often. We actually went to a strip club together and we both had a couple beers.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

Dude, you're going to strip clubs with her? You are so in.

Here's a couple examples of how to make a move- take her out to do something a bit physical like maybe playing pool at a bar. When you walk past her for your turn, put your hand on her arm for a second or two and say something flirty about the game. Also, try to mess up one of her shots by touching her arms or something and saying you're destracting her and she has no chance- or something. If she does that back to you, that's a great sign.

Or if you go somewhere where you're walking, bump into her every once in a while lightly, and see if she leans into you or bumps back. If so, you're good to go.

You probably want to be establishing a little bit of back and forth like that with the touching earlier in the night before you try for a kiss. If she's acting cold and not responsive, I'd abort the mission. But if she's bumping into you, or touching you, or leaning on you in responce- and judging by what you're saying she will- you're good to go.

Now where you kiss her would be up to you. You could go to one of your places and sit next to eachother and turn on a movie or TV show, and then just put your hand behind her head, turn slightly, and then lean in for a kiss, or you could find somewhere secluded at a bar or outside and slightly turn her body towards yours and lean in for a kiss. Or put your arm around her and lean her against the car when you're leaving and try that way. That's some of the things I'd be thinking about doing. After that just go with the flow.

 

[Jesse]

Thanks for the advice. Yeah I think I'm just gonna pass. It's just too scary and nervous for me.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

Or, you know, you could go to the strip club again and be like "I bet you're jealous that these girls give such great lapdances" or something, and try to get her to give you one. Then of course making a move would require zero effort from there.

Seriously, from the sound of things, you have a very easy shot here. Let alcohol give you your courage at least the first time and you'll do fine.

 

[Jesse]

lol. Yeah I think I'm just gonna pass. Too much for me to handle.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

Well you only live once. You can either take opportunities or sit back and say to yourself that you never get any. I'd see this as a good way to get some experience at the very least.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Help me. I'm pretty clueless.

Oh and this one time we were hanging out and it was about midnight and the "hang out" was about over. She asked me over to her house and said she was going to make me some milk and cookies. I wasn't really that hungry for cookies so I turned her down.

What should I do?

ROFLMAO....

Wtf dude...she invite you to her house...:club:

For MIKE and COOKIES !!!!!

That's the CODE for *** my ex-gf used to used in front of our children if she wanted to have *** with me...

geeezz wheez man...
Milk = ****ies
cookies= *****

You don't have to be hungery to eat the cookie..

Tell her...you'll like to have her bake you some milk and cookies someday or you changed your mind.

 

[PoWer2tHePeOpLE]

dude.. dont pass.. youll regret it.. well maybe you wont it is possible that in 5/10 yrs time you will look back and think how chivalrous you were or how you stood by loftier principles and protected a friendship that could have been destroyed if you got 'amorous' .. but i doubt it..

..simple.. nothing ventured - nothing gained...

when i was 14/15 i went to a movie night with a gorgeous girl i had a crush on and knew was attracted to me.. we spent the whole night sitting on the couch and i didnt even have the guts to put my arm around her.. even though i knew she wanted me to.. somehow i just couldnt get my arm up that high..felt like it was set in concrete and wouldnt move..hehe

..i regret it.. i remember it.. and if you dont want to make a move because you are scared/nervouse.. you'll remember it even more.. trust me.. its because you make a decision based on fear.. fear-based decisions linger.. like a bad smell..

she put your hand under her shirt! she went to a strip club with you! she invited you over for cookies and suggested a massage! and your asking if she is flirting!! she couldnt be more clear if she got a bullhorn and proclaimed it in the town centre!

you dont know what the future holds.. if you are worried it may mess up your friendship.. yeah it might.. but it might open the doors to something wonderful.. no point not doing it because of imagined negative consequences .. especially with something fundamentally uncertain as human relationships..

dvd.. couch.. at home.. alone.. perfect ...if you can make her laugh.. all the better.. turn to her.. look at her... take a breath to calm your nerves and DO IT

..kissing someone is not a commitment to marriage, a mortgage and children.. take it easy.. dont think too much..

and if it goes further.. BE SAFE... the beast creates consequences/complications..

good luck

 

[Jesse]

Ah well I guess she's definately been flirting then. I'm hoping she'll want to keep hanging out as friends because she's fun to hang out with.

I don't really know what flirting is, which is why I asked you guys. Pretty much a girl would have to say, hey, I like you! or I wouldnt know.

It's not a big deal really, I'm not out trying to get laid. It's more scary to me than pleasurable so it's really fine with me to not do it.

Unless I'm drunk... and then I'm freakin making moves left and right.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

But she's obviously hanging out with you because she wants to get some. I mean, you guys went to a strip club! She's trying to get you to do something and is going to probably be annoyed if you don't.

 

[Jesse]

But she's obviously hanging out with you because she wants to get some. I mean, you guys went to a strip club! She's trying to get you to do something and is going to probably be annoyed if you don't.

Man I don't want to be used for my man-stuff though. I had a girl like that once before. All she wanted was nothing but *** all the time. She'd come over 5 days a week wanting *** and sure she was great looking but I wanted more than that.

Or I could get really drunk and wooop there it is.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

Well here's the thing: you can have a girl to just mess around with no strings attatched, AND be looking for a girlfriend at the same time. AND this will build confidence and give you experience. Like if you're worried about how to make a move, you need to be practicing even with girls you're not going to get married to.

 

[Jack Kerouac]

Plus- who knows- maybe she would agree to be your girlfriend eventually.

 

[Jesse]

Hmn well I guess that's true. She wants to go to another strip club. Maybe I'll go again and drink a lot.