I've Gone Missing

[Jesse]

Who am I?
I am you when you are near.
I am her when she is here.
I am who I need to be-
yet every time, I am not me.

When alone I am nothing,
I am no one, Im as a stone.
Something isnt right.
Something is wrong.
I..dont know who I am.
I dont know where I belong.
I..I'm afraid. Someone help me.
Help me. Help me.

I search for what I believe...
at the moment it is this.
But suddenly it changes..
I anger and clench my fist.
I fall on my knees- tears on my face.
I look for friends- I find only space.

I wonder while I wander-
will I find what was lost?
I try but why do I bother?
My mind is at a loss.
A cross? He cant save me.
Go home lady. Leave me be.

Hope and faith..belief.
Trust. Can they get me through?
They must! I rise to find
Im empty still. I've lost that faith
and lost my will- the will to
carry on, the will to fight.
My mouth is bitter and Im filled
with spite.

Emotions and feelings suddenly drain..
All that's left is writhing pain.
And then it's gone, the memory of the day.
I rise once more and find my way.
My way? Where am i going?
What am i doing?
Who left me here all alone?
I've gone...long ago...then came back
with friends. Lot's of friends
are here with we. We are here,
we are all me.

Who am I? I am many and I am none.
I am several, once the day is done.

 

[luciddisconnect]

First stanza is nearly flawless. If "who am I" was the title then the nursery-rhyme scheme of the stanza would be perfectly measured and the meaning is perfectly legible.

Clarity of thought in the rest of the poem isn't quite as sharp but I'd consider it still to be a worthy attempt and your handling of language has improved. Good job.

 

[Jesse]

Hey thanks man. I should let people know that I usually write all of these in about 5 minutes or less on a whim and hardly ever edit. Also that most of these I've posted aren't new, but stuff I've written in the past. I havn't been posting them in order of creation.

 

[Zak]

Nice poem Jesse

 

[Jesse]

Thanks Sanal

I don't usually explain what my poems are about, but this one has quite a lot of meaning behind it and I think I'll share.


It's about identity problems.

"Who am I?
I am you when you are near.
I am her when she is here.
I am who I need to be-
yet every time, I am not me."


This is about how when I'm around people, I tend to pick up on their personality type or interests. It's like I change just a little bit to become a little like them. Not permanently, just while I'm around them.


When alone I am nothing,
I am no one, Im as a stone.
Something isnt right.
Something is wrong.
I..dont know who I am.
I dont know where I belong.
I..I'm afraid. Someone help me.
Help me. Help me.

I search for what I believe...
at the moment it is this.
But suddenly it changes..


This is about how when I'm alone I feel like I don't know who I am or what I'm about or what I believe in. I think I feel this way about something, but later it could be different. It's about instability. The rest covers different emotions and how they change quickly from anger, nothingness, several things at once, sadness, etc. It's about how I'm ready to give up, but know that I must go on at the same time.


I rise once more and find my way.
My way? Where am i going?
What am i doing?
Who left me here all alone?
I've gone...long ago...then came back
with friends. Lot's of friends
are here with we. We are here,
we are all me


This is about feeling like that little kid again who was scared. It's as if the little kid has woken up from being sealed off for years. It's about feeling alone and not knowing where to go or what to do. The friends who are with me are almost like different personalities that I tend to show. I'm not DID, but I have some identity issues sometimes.


Who am I? I am many and I am none.
I am several, once the day is done


Throughout the day I may feel nothingness or emptiness. I may feel confident, intelligent, scared, angry.. My emotions are so strong and change so often that it feels like being different people and nobody at the same time.